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The ship is in her trim; the merry wind

Blows fair from land: they stay for nought at all,
But for their owner, master, and yourself.

Ant. E. How now! a madman! Why thou peevish* sheep, What ship of Epidamnum stays for me?

Dro. S. A ship you sent me to, to hire waftage.

Ant. E. Thou drunken slave, I sent thee for a rope;

And told thee to what purpose and what end.

Dro. S. You sent me, Sir, for a rope's end as soon:

You sent me to the bay, Sir, for a bark.

Ant. E. I will debate this matter at more leisure,
And teach your ears to listen with more heed.
To Adriana, villain, hie thee straight:
Give her this key, and tell her, in the desk
That's covered o'er with Turkish tapestry,
There is a purse of ducats: let her send it;
Tell her, I am arrested in the street,

And that shall bail me: hie thee, slave; begone.
On, officer, to prison till it come.


Dro. S. To Adriana! that is where he dined,

Where Dowsabel did claim me for her husband:
She is too big, I hope, for me to compass.
Thither I must, although against my will,

For servants must their masters' minds fulfil.

SCENE II-The same.


Adr. Ah, Luciana, did he tempt thee so?
Mightst thou perceive austerely in his eye
That he did plead in earnest, yea or no?
Look'd he or red, or pale; or sad, or merrily?
What observation mad'st thou in this case,

Of his heart's meteors tilting in his face?

Luc. First, he denied you had in him no right.

Adr. He meant he did me none; the more my spite.
Luc. Then swore he that he was a stranger here.

Adr. And true he swore, though yet forsworn he were.
Luc. Then pleaded I for you.

Adr. And what said he?

Luc. That love I begg'd for you, he begg'd of me.

Adr. With what persuasion did he tempt thy love?
Luc. With words, that in an honest suit might move.

First he did praise my beauty; then, my speech.

Adr. Didst speak him fair?

Luc. Have patience, I beseech.

Adr. I cannot, nor I will not, hold me still;

My tongue, though not my heart, shall have his will.
He is deform'd, crooked, old, and sere,t

Ill-faced, worse-bodied, shapeless everywhere;

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Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind;
Stigmatical in making,* worse in mind.

Luc. Who would be jealous, then, of such a one?
No evil lost is wail'd when it is gone.

Adr. Ah! but I think him better than I say,
And yet would herein others' eyes were worse:

Far from her nest the lapwing cries away;

My heart prays for him, though my tongue do curse.

Enter DROMIO of Syracuse.

Dro. S. Here, go; the desk, the purse; sweet now, make haste. Luc. How hast thou lost thy breath?

Dro. S. By running fast.

Adr. Where is thy master, Dromio? is he well?

Dro. S. No, he's in Tartar limbo, worse than hell:

A devil in an everlasting garment hath him,

One, whose hard heart is button'd up with steel;
A fiend, a fairy, pitiless and rough;

A wolf, nay, worse, a fellow all in buff;

A back-friend, a shoulder-clapper, one that countermands
The passages of alleys, creeks, and narrow lands;

A hound that runs counter, and yet draws dry-foot well;
One that, before the judgment, carries poor souls to hell.+
Adr. Why, man, what is the matter?

Dro. S. I do not know the matter? he is 'rested on the case.
Adr. What, is he arrested? tell me, at whose suit.

Dro. S. I know not at whose suit he is arrested, well;

But he's in a suit of buff which 'rested him, that can I tell :

Will you send him, mistress, redemption, the money in the desk ?. Adr. Go fetch it, sister.-This I wonder at, [Exit LUCIANA. That he, unknown to me, should be in debt:

Tell me, was he arrested on a band?§

Dro. S. Not on a band, but on a stronger thing;

A chain, a chain; do you not hear it ring?

Adr. What, the chain ?

Dro. S. No, no, the bell: 'tis time that I were gone.

It was two ere I left him, and now the clock strikes one.
Adr. The hours come back! that did I never hear.

Dro. S. O yes, If any hour meet a sergeant, a' turns back for very fear.

Adr. As if time were in debt! how fondly dost thou reason? Dro. S. Time is a very bankrupt, and owes more than he's worth to season.

Nay, he's a thief, too: Have you not heard men say,
That time comes stealing on by night and day?
If he be in debt, and theft, and a sergeant in the way,
Hath he not reason to turn back an hour in a day?

* Marked by nature with deformity.

+ The sheriff's officers of those days were clad in buff, which was also a cant expression for a man's skin.

+ Hell was the cant term for prison.

§ Bond.

Re-enter LUCIANA.

Adr. Go, Dromio; there's the money, bear it straight;
And bring thy master home immediately.-

Come, sister; I am press'd down with conceit ;*
Conceit, my comfort and my injury.

SCENE III.-The same.

Enter ANTIPHOLUS of Syracuse.

Ant. S. There's not a man I meet but doth salute me

As if I were their well-acquainted friend;

And every one doth call me by my name.
Some tender money to me, some invite me;
Some other give me thanks for kindnesses;
Some offer me commodities to buy:

Even now a tailor call'd me in his shop,

And show'd me silks that he had bought for me,
And, therewithal took measure of my body.

Sure, these are but imaginary wiles,

And Lapland sorcerers inhabit here.

Enter DROMIO of Syracuse.


Dro. S. Master, here's the gold you sent me for: What, have you got the picture of old Adam new apparelled?

Ant. S. What gold is this? what Adam dost thou mean?

Dro. S. Not that Adam that kept the paradise, but that Adam that keeps the prison: he that goes in the calf's skin that was killed for the prodigal; he that came behind you, Sir, like an evil angel, and bid you forsake your liberty.

Ant. S. I understand thee not.

Dro. S. No? why, 'tis a plain case: he that went like a bassviol, in a case of leather; the man, Sir, that, when gentlemen are tired, gives them a fob, and 'rests them; he, Sir, that takes pity on decayed men, and gives them suits of durance; he that sets up his rest† to do more exploits with his mace, than a morrispike.

Ant. S. What! thou mean'st an officer?

Dro. S. Ay, Sir, the sergeant of the band; he, that brings any man to answer it, that breaks his band: one that thinks a man always going to bed, and says, God give you good rest.

Ant. S. Well, Sir, there rest in your foolery. Is there any ship puts forth to-night? may we be gone?

Dro. S. Why, Sir, I brought you word, an hour since, that the bark Expedition put forth to-night; and then were you hindered by the sergeant, to tarry for the hoy, Delay: Here are the angels that you sent for, to deliver you.

Ant. S. The fellow is distract, and so am I;

And here we wander in illusions :

Some blessed power deliver us from hence!

*Fanciful conception.

Is confident.

+ Moorish spear.


Cour. Well met, well met, master Antipholus,
I see, Sir, you have found the goldsmith now;
Is that the chain you promised me to-day?

Ant. S. Satan, avoid! I charge thee, tempt me not!
Dro. S. Master, is this Mistress Satan?

Ant. S. It is the devil.

Dro. S. Nay, she is worse, she is the devil's dam; and here she comes in the habit of a light wench; and thereof comes, that the wenches say, God damn me, that's as much as to say, God make me a light wench. It is written, they appear to men like angels of light: light is an effect of fire, and fire will burn; ergo, light wenches will burn; Come not near her.

Cour. Your man and you are marvellous merry, Sir. Will you go with me? We'll mend our dinner here.

Dro. S. Master, if you do expect spoon-meat, or bespeak a long spoon.

Ant. S. Why, Dromio ?

Dro. S. Marry, he must have a long spoon, that must eat with the devil.

Ant. S. Avoid then, fiend, why tell'st thou me of supping? Thou art, as you are all, a sorceress:

I conjure thee to leave me, and be gone.

Cour. Give me the ring of mine you had at dinner,

Or, for my diamond, the chain you promised;

And I'll be gone, Sir, and not trouble you.

Dro. S. Some devils ask but the paring of one's nail,

A rush, a hair, a drop of blood, a pin,

A nut, a cherrystone: but she, more covetous,
Would have a chain.

Master, be wise; and if you give it her,

The devil will shake her chain and fright us with it.
Cour. I pray you, Sir, the ring, or else the chain;

I hope you do not mean to cheat me so.

Ant. S. Avaunt, thou witch! Come, Dromio, let us go.

Dro. S. Fly pride, says the peacock: Mistress, that you know. [Exeunt ANT. and DRO. Cour. Now, out of doubt, Antipholus is mad,

Else would he never so demean himself:
A ring he hath of mine worth forty ducats,
And for the same he promised me a chain !
Both one and other he denies me now.
The reason that I gather he is mad
(Besides this present instance of his rage),
Is a mad tale, he told to-day at dinner,

Of his own doors being shut against his entrance.
Belike, his wife, acquainted with his fits,
On purpose shut the doors against his way.
My way is now to hie home to his house,
And tell his wife, that, being lunatic,
He rushed into my house and took perforce

My ring away: This course I fittest choose;
For forty ducats is too much to lose.

SCENE IV-The same.

Enter ANTIPHOLUS of Ephesus and an OFFICER.
Ant. E. Fear me not, man, I will not break away;
I'll give thee, ere I leave thee, so much money
To warrant thee, as I am 'rested for.
My wife is in a wayward mood to day:
And will not lightly trust the messenger,
That I should be attach'd in Ephesus:

I tell you, 'twill sound harshly in her ears.—

Enter DROMIO of Ephesus with a rope's end.

Here comes my man; I think he brings the money.
How now, Sir? have you that I sent you for?

Dro. E. Here's that, I warrant you, will pay them all.
Ant. E. But where's the money?


Dro. E. Why, Sir, I gave the money for the rope.
Ant. E. Five hundred ducats, villain, for a rope?
Dro. E. I'll serve you, Sir, five hundred at the rate.
Ant. E. To what end did I bid thee hie thee home?
Dro. E. To a rope's end, Sir; and to that end am I return'd.
Ant. E. And to that end, Sir, I will welcome you.

Off. Good Sir, be patient.

[Beating him.

Dro. E. Nay, 'tis for me to be patient; I am in adversity.

Offi. Good now, hold thy tongue.

Dro. E. Nay, rather persuade him to hold his hands.

Ant. E. Thou whoreson, senseless villain!

Dro. E. I would I were senseless, Sir, that I might not feel your blows.


Ant. E. Thou art sensible in nothing but blows, and so is an

Dro. E. I am an ass, indeed; you may prove it by my long* ears. I have served him from the hour of nativity to this instant, and have nothing at his hands for my service, but blows: when I am cold, he heats me with beating: when I am warm, he cools me with beating: I am waked with it, when I sleep; raised with it, when I sit; driven out of doors with it, when I go from home; welcomed home with it, when I return nay, I bear it on my shoulders, as a beggar wont her brat; and, I think, when he hath lamed me, I shall beg with it from door to door.

Enter ADRIANA, LUCIANA, and the COURTEZAN, with PINCII, and others.

Ant. E. Come, go along; my wife is coming yonder.

Dro. E. Mistress, respice finem, respect your end; or rather the prophecy, like the parrot, Beware the rope's end.

* I. e. lengthened by pulling.

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