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Prin Why, will shall break it; will, and no- Mean time, receive such welcome at my hand, thing else.
As honour, without breach of honour, may King. Your ladyship is ignorant what it is. Make tender of to thy true worthiness : Prin Were my lord so, his ignorance were wise, You may not come, fair princess, in my gates; Where now his knowledge must prove igporance. But here without you shall be so receiv'd, I hear your grace hath sworn-out house-keeping: As you shall deem yourself lodg'd in my heart, 'Tis deadly sin to keep that oath, my lord, Though so denied fair harbour in my house. And sin to break it :
Your own good thoughts excuse me, and fareBut pardon me, I am too sudden-bold;
well ; To teach a teacher ill beseemeth me.
To-morrow shall we visit you again. Vouchsafe to read the purpose of my coming, Prin. Sweet health and fair desires consort And suddenly resolve me in my suit.
(Gives a Paper. King Thy own wish wish I thee in every place! King. Madam, I will, if suddenly I may.
[Ereunt King and his l'rain. Prin. You will the sooner, that I were away; Biron. Lady, I will commend you to my own For you'll prove perjur'd, if you make me stay. heart. Biron. Did not I dance with you in Brabant Ros. 'Pray, you, do my commendations; I once ?
would be glad to see it. Ros. Did not I dance with you in Brabant Biron. I would, you heard it groan.
Ros. Is the fool 'sick ? Biron. I know you did.
Biron. Sick at heart. Ros.
How needless was it then Ros. Alack, let it blood. To ask the question!
Biron. Would that do it good ? Biron.
You must not be so quick. Ros. My Physick says, I. Ros. 'Tis 'long of you that spur me with such Biron. Will you prick’t with your eye? questions.
Ros. No point, with my knife. Biron. Your wit's too hot, it speeds too fast, Biron. Now, God save thy life! 'twill tire.
Ros. And yours from long living! Ros. Not till it leave the rider in the mire. Biron. I cannot stay thanksgiving: [Retiring. Biron. What time o' day?
Dum. Sir, I pray you, a word: What lady is Ros. The hour that fools should ask.
that same ? Biron. Now fair befall your mask !
Boyet. The heir of Alencon, Rosaline her name. Ros. Fair fall the face it covers!
Dum. A gallant lady! Monsieur, fare you well. Biron. And send you many loyers!
(Erit. Ros. Amen, so you be none.
Long. I beseech you a word; What is she in Biron. Nay, then will I be gone.
the white ? King. Madam, your father here doth intimate Boyet. A woman sometimes, an you saw her The payment of a hundred thousand crowns;
in the light. Being but the one half of an entire sum, Long. Perchance, light in the light : I desire Disbursed by my father in his wars.
her name. But say, that he, or we (as neither have,) Boyet. She hath but one for herself; to desire Receiv'd that sum; yet there remains unpaid that were a shame. A hundred thousand more; in surety of the Long: 'Pray you, sir, whose daughter ? which,
mother's, I have heard. One part of Aquitain is bound to us,
Long. God's blessing on your beard !
Long. Nay, my choler is ended.
She is a most sweet lady.
Boyet. To her will, sir, or so.
Boyet. Farewell to me, sir, and welcome to Than Aquitain so gelded as it is.
you. [Erit Biron. -Ladies unmask. Dear princess, were not his requests so far Mar. That last is Biron, the merry mad-cap From reason's yielding, your fair self should lord; make
Not a word with him but a jest. A yielding 'gainst some reason, in my breast, Boyet.
And every jest but a word. And go well satisfied to France again.
Prin. It was well done of you to take him at Prin. You do the king my father too much his word. wrong,
Boyet. I was as willing to grapple, as he was And wrong the repntation of your name,
to board. In so unseeming to confess receipt
Mar. Two hot sheeps, marry! Of that which hath so faithfully been paid. Boyet.
And wherefore not ships ? King. I do protest, I never heard of it; No sheep, sweet lamb, unless
we feed on your lips. And, if you prove it, i'll repay it back,
Mar. You sheep, and I pasture; shall that Or yield up Aquitain.
finish the jest ? Prin.
We arrest your word :
-Boyet. So you grant pasture for me. Boyet, you can produce acquittances,
[ Offering to kiss her. For such a sum, from special officers
Not so, gentle beast : Of Charles his father.
My lips are no common, though several they be King. Satisfy me so.
Boyet. Belonging to whom ? Boyet. So please your grace, the packet is not Mar.
To my fortunes and me. come,
Prin. Good wits will be jangling; but, gentles, Where that and other specialties are bound;
agree: Tomorrow you shall have a sight of them. The civil war of wits were much better used King. It shall suffice me: at which interview, On Navarre and his book-men ; for here ris All liberal reason I will yield unto.
Boyet. If my observation (which very seldom Moth. By my penny of observation.
Arm. But 0,-but 0,-
Moth. No, master; the hobby-horse is bnt a Boyet. With that which we lovers entitle, af- colt, and your love perhaps a hackney. But fected.
have you forgot your love 1 Prin. Your reason ?
Arm. Almost I had.
Arm. By heart, and in heart, boy.
Arm. What wilt thou prove?
with her; and out of heart you love her, being
nothing at all.
Moth. Marry, sir, you must send the ass upon
Moth. As swift as lead, sir.
Arm. Thy meaning, pretty ingenions ?
You are too swift, sir, to say so:
Arm. Sweet smoke of rhetorick!
What then, do you see? | I shoot thee at the swain. Ros. Ay, our way to be gone.
Thump then, and I flee.
Most rude melancholy, valour gives thee place. SCENE I. Another part of the same.
My herald is return'd.
Re-enter Moth and Costard.
Moth. A wonder, master; here's a Costard
Arm. Some enigma, some riddle ;-come,-thy Moth. Concoline
[Singing l'envoy ;-begin. Arm. Sweet air! Go tenderness of years; take. Cost. No egina, no riddle, no l'enroy: no salve this key, give enlargement to the swain, bring in the mail, sir : 0, sir, plantain, a plain planhim festinately hither; I must employ him in a tain: no l'envoy, nó l'envoy, no'salve, sir, bus letter to my love.
a plantain ! Moth. Master, will you win your love with a Arm. By virtue, thou enforcest langhter ; thy French brawl?
silly thought, my spleen ; the heaving of my Arm. How mean'st thou ? brawling in French? lungs provokes me to ridiculous smiling : 0, Moth. No, my complete master : but to jig off pardon me, my stars! Doth the inconsiderate a tune at the tongue's end, canary to it with your take salve for l'envoy, and the word, l'envoy, feet, humour it with turning up your eyelids; for a salve ? sigh a note, and sing a note; sometime through Moth. Do the wise think them other ? is net the throat, as if you swallowed love with sing. l'envoy a salve ? ing love ! 'sometime through the nose, as if you Arm. No, page; it is an epilogue or discourse, snuffed up love by smelling love; with your hat to make plain penthouselike o'er the shop of your eyes; with Some obscure precedence that hath tofore been your arms crossed on your thin belly-doublet, sain. like a rabbit on a spit; or your hands in your I will example it : pocket, like a man after the old painting; and The fox, the ape, and the bumblebee, keep not too long in one tune, but a snip and Were still at odds, being but three. away: These are complements, these are hu- There's the moral: Now the l'envoy. mours; these betray nice wenches--that would Moth. I will add the l'envoy: Say the moral be betrayed without these; and make them men again. of note, (do you note, men ?) that most are af Arm. The fox, the ape, and the humblebee fected to these.
Were still at odds, being but three : Arm. How hast thou purchased this experi-)Moth. Until the goose came out of door, ence ?
And stay'd the odds by adding four.
Now will I begin your moral, and do you follow Biron. It must be done this afternoon. Hark, with my l'envoy.
slave, it is but this ;The fox, the ape, and the humblebee, The princess comes to hunt here in the park,
Were still at odds, being but three : And in her train there is a gentle lady ; Arm. Until the goose came out of door, When tongues speak sweetly, then they name Staying the odds by adding four.
her name, Moth. A good l'envoy, ending in the goose, And Rosaline they call her : ask for her ; Would you desire more ?
And to her white hand see thou do commend Cost. The boy hath sold him a bargain, a This seald-up counsel. There's thy guerdon; go. goose ; that's flat:
[Gives him money. Sir, your pennyworth is good, an your goose be Cost. Guerdon,--Osweet guerdon! better than fat.
remuneration ; eleven-pence farthing better : To sell a bargain well, is as cunning as fast and Most sweet guerdon ;-I will do it, sir, in print. loose : -Guerdon-remuneration.
Erit. Let me see a fat l'endoy: ay, that's a fat goose. Biron. O!- And I, forsooth, in love! I, that Arm. Come hither, come hither : How did this have been love's whip; argument begin ?
A very beadle to a humorous sigh; Moth By saying that a Costard was broken in A critick; nay, a night-watch constable ; a sbio.
A domineering pedant o'er the boy, Then call'd you for the l'envoy:
Than whom no mortal so magnificent! Cost. True, and I for a plantain ; Thus came This wimpled, whining, purblind wayward your argument in;
boy: Then the boy's fat l'envoy, the goose that you This senior-junior, giant-dwarf, Dan Cupid; bought;
Regent of love-rhymes, lord of folded arms, And he ended the market.
The anointed sovereign of sighs and groans, Arm. But tell me ; how was there a Costard Liege of all loiterers and malcontents, broken in a shin ?
Dread prince of plackets, king of codpieces, Moth. I will tell you sensibly.
Sole imperator, and great general Cost. Thou hast no feeling of it, Moth; I will of trotting paritors--O my little heart! speak that l'entoy.
And I to be a corporal of his field, 1 Costard, running out, that was safely within, And wear his colours like a tumbler's hoop! Fell over the threshold, and broke my shin. What? I! I love! I sue! I seek a wife ! Arm. We will talk no more of this matter. A woman, that is like a German clock, Cost. Till there be more matter in the shin. Still a repairing ; ever out of frame; Arm. Sirrah Costard, I will enfranchise thee. And never going aright, being a watch, Cost. O, marry me to one Frances :- I smell But being watch'd, that it may still go right ? some l'envoy, some goose, in this.
Nay, to be perjur'd, which is worst of all; Arm. By my sweet soul, I mean, setting thee And, among three, to love the worst of all; At liberty, enfreedoming thy person; thou wert A whitely wanton with a velvet brow, immured, restrained, captivated, bound. With two pitch balls stuck in her face for eyes :
Cost True, true: and now you will be in my Ay, and, by heaven, one that will do the deed, purgation, and let me loose.
Though 'Argus were her eunuch and her guard; Armin I give thee thy liberty, set thee from And I to sigh for her! to watch for her! durance; and, in lieu thereof, impose on thee To pray for her! Go to; it is a plague nothing but this : Bear this significant to the That Cupid will impose for my neglect country maid Jaquenetta : there is remunera of his almighty dreadful little might. tion (Giving him money.) for the best ward Well, I will love, write, sigh, pray, sue, and of mine honour, is, rewarding my dependents. groan: Moth, follow.
[Erit. Some men must love my lady, and some Joan. Moth. Like the sequel, J.-Signior Costard,
[Erit. adieu. Cost. My sweet ounce of man's flesh ! my incony Jew!
[Erit Moth. Now will I look to his remuneration. Remu
ACT IV. peration ! O, that's the Latin word for three far
SCENE I. Another part of the same. things: three farthings-remuneration.-What's the price of this inkle ? a penny :-No, I'll give Enter the Princess, Rosaline, Maria, Katharine, you a remuneration: why, it carries' it.-Be. Boyet, Lords, Attendants, and a Forester. muneration !-why, it is a fairer name than
Prin. Was that the king, that spurr'd his horse French crown. I will never buy and sell out of
so hard this word.
Against the steep uprising of the hill ?
Boyet. I know not; but, I think, it was not he. Biron. O, my good knave Costard I exceed- Prin. Whoe'er he was, he showed a mounting ingly well met.
mind. Cost 'Pray you, sir, how much carnation rib- Well, lords, to-day we shall have our despatch ; bon may a man buy for a remuneration ? On Saturday we will return to France. Biron. What is a remuneration ?
Then, forester, my friend, where is the bush, Cost. Marry, sir, half-penny farthing. That we must stand and play the murderer in?
Biron. o, why then, three-farthings-worth of For. Ilere by, upon the edge of yonder coppice; milk.
A stand, where you may make the tairest shoot. Cost. I thank your worship: God be with you! Prin. I thank my beauty, I am fair that shoot, Biron. O, stay, slave; I must employ thee : And therenpon thou speak'st, the fairest shoot. As thou wilt win my favour, good my knave, For. Pardon me, madam, for I meant not so. Do one thing for me that I shall entreat.
Prin. What, what? first praise me, and again Cost. When would you have it done, sir ? Biron. O, this afternoon.
O short-liv'd pride! Not fair ? alack for wo! Cost. Well, I will do it, sir: Fare you well. For. Yes, madam, fair. Biron. O, thou knowest not what it is.
Nay, never paint me now; Cost. I shall know, sir, when I have done it. Where fair is not, praise cannot mend the brow. Biron Why, villain, thou must know first. Here, good my glass, take this for telling true; Cost. I will come to your worship to-morrow
[Giving him money. morning.
|Fair payment for fout words is more than due.
For. Nothing but fair is that which you inherit treat thy love? I will. What shalt thou ez. Prin. See, see, my beauty will be sav'd by change for rags ?_robes; For tittles, titles; merit.
For thyself, me. Thus, especting thy reply, 1 O heresy in fair, fit for these days!
profane my lips on thy foot, my eyes on thy A giving hand, though foul, shall have fair picture, and my heart on thy every part. praise.
Thine in the deurest design of industry,
DON ADRIANO DE ARMÅbo.
'Gainst thee, thou lamb, that standest as his Not wounding, pity would not let me do't ;
Food for his rage, repasture for his den.
this letter? We bend to that the working of the heart; What vane? what weathercock 3 did you ever As I, for praise alone, now seek to spill
hear better? The poor deer's blood, that my heart means Boyet. I am much deceived, but I remember
the style. Boyet. Do not curst wives hold that self-sove Prin. Else your memory is bad, going o'er it reignty
erewhile. Only for praise sake, when they strive to be Boyet. This Armado is a Spaniard, that keeps Lords o'er their lords?
here in court; Prin. Only for praise : and praise we may A phantasm, a Monarcho, and one that makes afford
sport To any lady that subdues a lord.
To the prince, and his book-mates.
Thou, fellow, a word :
Who gave thee this letter ? Here comes a member of the commonwealth. Cost.
I told you,
my lord Cost. God dig-you-den all ! 'Pray you, which Prin. To whom shonldst thou give it? is the head lady?
From my lord to my lady. Prin. Thou shalt know her, fellow, by the rest Prin. From which lord, to which lady 1 that have no heads.
Cost. From my lord Biron, a good master of Cost. Which is the greatest lady, the highest ?
mine, Prin. The thickest, and the tallest.
To a lady of France, that he call'd Rosaline. Cost. The thickest, and the tallest ! it is so ;) Prin. 'Thou hast mistaken his letter. Come, truth is truth.
lords, away. An your waist, mistress, were as slender as my Here, sweet, put up this ; 'will be thine another wit,
[Exit Princess and train. One of these maids' girdles for your waist should Boyet. Who is the suitor ? who is the suitor ? be fit.
Shall I teach you to know 3
Why, she that bears the bow.
Finely put on!
And who is your deer? Boyet.
I am bound to serve. Ros. If we choose by the horns, yourself: come This letter is mistook, it importeth none here;
near. It is writ to Jaquenetta..
Finely put on, indeed! Prin.
We will read it, I swear: Mar. You still wrangle with her, Boyet, and Break the neck of the wax, and every one give she strikes at the brow. ear.
Boyet. But she herself is hit lower: Have I hit Boyet. [Reads:) By heaven, that thou art her now? fair, is most infallible; true, that thou art Ros. Shall I come upon thee with an old saybeauteous; truth itself, that thou art lorely: ing, that was a man when king Pepin of France More fairer than fair, beautiful than beau- was a little boy, as touching the hit it? teous; truer than truth itself, have commise- Boyet. So I may answer thee with one as old, ration on thy heroical vassal! The mag. that was a woman when queen Guinever of Brinanimous and most illustrate king Cophetua tain was a little wench, as touching the hit it. set eye upon the pernicious and indubitate beg- Ros. Thou canst not hit it, hit it, hit it, gar Zenelophon; and he it was that might right
[Singing ly say, veni, vidi, vici; which to anatomize in Thou canst not hit it, my good man. the vulgar, (O base and obscure vulgar!) vide-Boyet. An I cannot, cannot, cannot, licet, he came, saw, and overcame: he came,
An I cannot, another can one saw, two; overcame, three. Who came ?
[Exeunt Ros. and Kath. the king; Why did he come? to see; Why did Cost. By my troth, most pleasant ! how both he see? to overcome ; To whom came he? to did fit it! the beggar; What saw he? the beggar; Who Mar. A mark marvellous well shot; for they overcame he? the beggar: The conclusion is both did hit it. victory; On whose side? the king's: The cap- Boyet. A mark! O, mark but that mark; A tive is enriched; On whose side? The beggar's; mark, says my lady! The catastrophe is a nuptial; On whose side? Let the mark have a prick in't, to mete at, if r the king's ?- no, on both in one, or one in both. may be. I am the king; for so stands the comparison; Mar. Wide o' the bow hand I l' faith your hand thou the beggar; for 80 witnesseth thy lowli is ont. ness. Shall I command thy love? I may: Cost. Indeed, a' must shoot nearer, or ben Shall I enforce thy love? I could : Shall I en ne'er hit the clout
Boyet. An if my hand be out, then, belike your) Hol. The moon was a month old, when Adam hand is in.
was no more ; Cost. Then will she get the upshot by cleaving And ranght not to five weeks, when he came to the pin
fivescore. Mar. Come, come, you talk greasily, your lips The allusion holds in the exchange. grow foul.
Dull. 'Tis true, indeed; the collusion holds in Cost. She's too hard for you at pricks, sir; the exchange. challenge her to bowl.
Hol. God comfort thy capacity! I say, the Boyet. I fear too much, rubbing; Good night, allusion holds in the exchange.
my good owl. [Ereunt Boyet and Maria Dull. And I say the pollution holds in the exCost. By my soul, a swain! a most simple change; for the moon is never but a month old: clown!
and I say beside, that 'twas a pricket that the Lord, lord! how the ladies and I have put him princess killpu. down!
Ilol. Sir Nathaniel, will you hear an extemO my troth, most sweel jests! most incony vul- poral epitaph on the death of the deer? and, to
humour the ignorant, I have called the deer the When it comes so smoothly off, so obscenely, as princess kill'd, a pricket. it were, so fit.
Nath. Perge, good master Holofernes, perge; Armatho o' the one side,-0, a most dainty man! so it shall please you to abrogate scurrility. To see him walk before a lady, and to bear her Hol. I will something affect the letter for it fan!
argues facility. To see him kiss his hand! and how most sweetly The praisefül princess pierc'd and prick'd a a' will swear!
pretty pleasing pricket : And his page o' t'other side, that handful of wit! Some say, a sore; but not a sore, till noro Ah, heavens, it is a most pathetical nit!
made sore with shooting. Sola, sola!
The dogs did yell! put l to sore, then sorel (Shouting within. Erit Cost. running. jumps from thicket; SCENE II. The same.
Or, pricket, sore, or else sorel; the people
fall a hooting Enter Holofernes, Sir Nathaniel, and Dull. If sore be sore, then L to sore makes fifty sores; Nath. Very reverent sport, truly; and done O sore L! in the testimony of a good conscience.
of one sore I a hundred make, by adding but Hol. The deer was, as you know, in sanguis,
one more L. blood ; ripe as a pomewater, who now hangeth Nath. A rare talent! like a jewel in the ear of cælo,--the sky, the wel. Dull. If a talent be a claw, look how he claws kin, the heaven; and anon falleth like a crab, him with a talent. on the face of terra, -the soil, the land, the Hol. This is a gift that I have, simple, simple; earth.
a foolish extravagant spirit, full of forms, figures, Nath Truly, master Holofernes, the epithets shapes, objects, ideas, apprehensions, motions, are sweetly varied, like a scholar at the least; revolutions: these are begot in the ventricle of But, sir, I assure ye, it was a buck of the first memory, nonrished in the womb of pia mater; head.
and deliver'd upon the mellowing of occasion: Hol. Sir Nathaniel, haud credo.
But the gift is good in those in whom it is acute, Dull. 'Twas not a haud credo, 'twas a pricket. and I am thankful for it.
Hol. Most barbarous intimation! yet a kind Nath. Sir, I praise the Lord for you; and so of insinuation, as it were, in via, in way, of ex- may my parishioners; for their sons are well plication; facere, a it were, replication, or, ra- tutord by you; and their daughters profit very ther, ostentare, to show, as it were, his inclina- greatly under you: you are a good inember of tion,--after his undressed, unpolished, uned.. the commonwealth. cated, inpruned, untrained, or rather unlettered, Hol. Mchercle, if their sons be ingenious, they or, ratherest, unconfirmed fashion,--to insert shall want no instruction: if their daughters be again my haud credo for a deer.
ciepable, I will put it to them: But, vir sapit, Dull. I said, the deer was not a haud credo ; qui pauca loquitur: a soul feminine saluteth us. 'twas a pricket. Hol Twire sod simplicity, bis coctus !- thou
Enter Jaquenetta. and Costard. monster, ignorance, how deformed dost thou Jaq. God give you good morrow, master person. look! Nath. Sir, he hath never fed of the dainties one shonld be pierced, which is the one ?
Hol. Master person,-quasi pers-on. And if that are bred in a book; he hath not eat paper, Cost. Marry, master schoolmaster, he that is as it were: he hath not drunk ink: his intellect likest to a hogshead. is not replenished; he is only an animal, only Hol. of piercing a hogshead! a good lustre sensible in the duller parts;
of conceit in a turf of earth ; fire enough for a And such barren plants are set before us, that we flint, pearl enough for a swine: 'lis pretty; it is thankful should be
well! (Which we of taste and feeling are) for those Jan. Good master parson, be so good as read
parts that do fructify in us more than he. me this letter; it was given me by Costard, and For as it would ill become me to be vain, indis- sent me from Don Armatho : I beseech you, creet, or a fool,
read it. o, were there a patch set on learning, to see Hol. Fauste, precor gelida quando pecus omne him in a school:
sub umbra But, omne bene, say I; being of an old father's Ruminat,--and so forth. Ah, good old Mantuap! mind,
I may speak of thee as the traveller doth of Many can brook the weather that love not the
Venice: wind. Dull. You two are book-men: Can you tell by
Chi non te vede, ei non te pregia. What was a month old at Cain's birth, that's Old Mantuan! old Mantuan! Who understan.l. not five weeks old as yet?
eth thee not, loves thee not. - Ut, re, sol, la, mi, Hol. Dictynna, good man Dull; Dictynna, fa.-Under pardon, sir, what are the contests good man Dull.
or, rather, as Horace says in his-What my Dill. What is Dictynna ?
soul, verses? Nath. A title to Phæbe, to Luna, to the moon. Nath. Ay, sir, and very learncil.