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gift of God! and a true feeler ulways brings half the entertainment along with trim," or
"A jest's prosperity lies in the ear
Of him that makes it."
THE COQUETTES. A DIALOGUE: A dedicat gentleman, distinguished not only for
I love, and am beloved again,
Strephon no more shall sigh in vain ; his professional ability, but likewise for his attach I've try'd his faith, and found him true, meni to literature, being in a very debilitated con
And all my coyness bid adieu. dition fron the effects of long illness, engaged a 2. I love, and am belov'd again, Foung man to read to him. It happened that the
Yet still my Thyrsis shall complaio ; person who was recomended to the doctor for
I'm sure he's mine while I refuse him, this purpose had not exactly received wliat is
But when I yield I fear to lose him. termed a liberal education ; in faet, he had been
1. Men will grow faint with tedious fasting. accustomed to dispense other than literary sweets, 2. And both will tire with often tasting, having tabia his degrees in a magazine of spices When they find the bliss not lasting. and groceries. It will, therefore, not appear sur 1. Love is complete in kind possessing. prising, that on being installed in his lectureship, 2. Ah no ! ah no! that ends the blessing. several lapsis lingua oceurred in the execution of his office, which not a little astonished as well as
Chorus of both.
Then let us beware how far we consent annoyed the sensitive ear of his learned auditor. At length the unfortunate reader, inecting with
Too soon when we yield, too late we repent;
"Tis ignorance makes men admire ; one of those exquisite polysyllables of Greck derivation, equally the delight of the pedant and the
And granting desire
We feed not the fire, terror of the uninitiated, fairly broke down. Disconcerted at the circumstance, the doctor inquired
But make it more quickly expire. of him whether he had ever learned Greek or La
UNPALATABLE IMPROVEMENT. in; not receiving an immediate answer to his Wilkes attended a city dinner, not long after his question, “ Do you mean, sir," said the sick gen- promotion to city honours. Among the guests was tleman," to tell me that you know any language a noisy vulgar depnty, a great glutton, who, on but English ?"' 'The unfortunate catechumen, tlius his entering the dinner room, always with great completely screwed to the sticking-place, reluc- deliberation took off his wig, suspended it on a pin, tantly acknowledged that he did not, but gravely and with due solemnity put on a white cotton assured the interrogator that he had a brother who night-cap. Wilkes, who was a high bred nian, was perfectly acquainted with French.
and never accustomed to sinuilar exhibitions, could
not take his eyes from so strange and novel a pic- been highly amuscd with the scene, called to the ture. At length the deputy walked up to Wilkes, negro, and observed that though the wager had and asked him whether he did not think that his been laid, he did not see how payment could be night-cap became him? “Oh! yes, sir," replied obtained from the mule. “Oh yes," replied the Wilkes, “ but it would look much better if it was black, “ Massa give ine tenpenny for corn for him; pulled quite over your face."
he lose the bct, and me only give him fivepenny."
XONSENSE V. SENSE.
RECOLLECTION. When Wilkes was confined in the King's
False tho' she be to me and love, Bench, he was waited upon by a deputation from
I'll ne'er pursue revenge ;
For still the charmer I approve, some ward in the city, when the office of alderman was vacant. As there had already been great fer
Tho' I deplore her chauge. mentation on his account, and much more ap
In hours of bliss we oft bare met, prehended, they who were deputed undertook to
They could not always last ; remonstrate with Wilkes on the danger to the public
And tho' the present I regret, peace which would result from his offering him
l'in grateful for the past. self as a candidate on the present occasion, and
DR. JOHNSON AND THE SCOTCH. cxpressed the hope that he would at least wait till some more suitable opportunity presented itself.
On Johnson's return from his tour to the HeBut they mistook their man ; this was with him an brides, he expressed, not:vith:standing the hospitaadditional motive for persevering in his first inten- lity he had experienced on his progress through tions. After much useless conversation, one of the Scotland, the strongest antipathy to cvery thing deputies at length exclaimed, “ Well, Mr. Wilkes, connected with that country. A Scotch gentleman if you are thus determined, we must take the sense who had been informed of this, being in company of the ward." “With all my heart,” replied with the doctor, addressed him with “ Well, docWilkes, “I will take the non-sense, and beat you tor, so I learn you are just arrived from Scotland : ten to one."
pray what do you think of my country?” “Think,
sir," replied Johnson, “why, it is a detestable liis attention arrested by a singular contest between could only answer, “Well, doctor, such as it is, An English gentleroan, travelling in America, had country, to be sure.” Disconcerted by a reply so
unpalatable and unceremonious, the North Briton negro and the mule on which he was mounted.
God made it." The indocile animal had thought proper to take Johnson,“ but you will recollect that he only made
“ True, very true, sir,” rejoined exception to the carriage of the gentleman, which it for Scotchmen; and were not comparisons justly preceded him, and evinced a decided disinclination to pass it; his rider, on the other hand, was as deemed odious, I might remind you, sir, that God
made Hell." resolute in his determination to effect a change in the conduct of his beast. At length the gentleman
TOI. H. W~N, ON HIS SPECIMENS OF A heard Blackey exclaim to the mule, " l'll bet you a fivepenny I make you go by this time ;" then, nodding his head, he added, “Do you bet ?" After O thou! whom poetry abhors, which, by means of some very pressing arguments Whom angry prose kick'd out of doors, of whip and spur, he succeeded in making the ani. Hear'st thou that groan ? proceed no further, mal pass the carriage. The gentlemai, who had Translated Tasso roar; out, MURDER!
TRANSLATION OF TASSO.
PROGRESS OF LUXCRY.
CARDS AND KISSES.
he was exhibiting his imitations at one of the Theatres Ja an old Cambridge comedy of the Returne from Royal, that he would, on a stated evening, take uff Parnassus, we find this indignant description of the Quin : who, being desirous of seeing his own picture, progress of luxury in those days, put into the mouth took a place in the stage box, and when the audience of one of the speakers.
had ceased applauding Foote for the jusiness of the “ Why is't not strange to see a ragged clerkę,
representation, Quin bawled out, “I am glad on't, Some stammell weaver, or some butcher's sonne,
the poor fellow will get a clean shirt by it.” When That scrubb'd a late within a sleeveless gowne,
Foote immediately retorted from the stage, “A clean When the commencement, like a morrice dance,
shirt, Master Quin !--a shirt of any kind was a very Hath put a bell or two about his legges,
novel thing in your family some few years ago.” Created him a sweet cleane gentleman :
QUEEN ELIZABETH AT COVENTRY.
In a second tour through England, soon after the Must take tobacco, and must wear a locke. defeat of the Spanish Armada, queen Elizabeth paid the His thirsty dad driokes in a wooden bowle, city of Coventry another visit. The mayor, on her But bis sweet self is served in silver plate. majesty's departure, among other particulars, said, His hungry sire will scrape you twenty legges
“ When the King of Spain attacked your majesty, For one good Christmas meal on new year's day,
egad, he took the wrong sow by the ear.” The queen But his mawe must be capon cramm'd each day.” could not help smiling at the man's simplicity, which
was further beightened, when he begged to have the
honour to attend the queen as far as the gallows ; Cupid and my Campaspe play'd
which stood at that time about a mile out of the At cards for kisses, Cupid paid ; He stakes his quiver, bow, and arrows; His mother's doves, and team of sparrows.
At another time when the queen, in her progress Loses them too, then down he throws
through the kingdom, called at Coventry, the mayor, The coral of his lip, the rose
attended by the aldermen, addressed her majesty in Growing on's cheek (but none knows how)
rhyme, in the following words :With these the crystal of his brow,
“We men of Coventry And then the dimple of his chin;
Are very glad to see All these did my Campaspe win..
Your royal majesty : At last he set her both his eyes,
Good Lord, how fair you be !" She won, and Cupid blind did rise.
To which her majesty returned the following gra0, Love! has she done this to thee?
cious answer : What shall, alas ! become of mo?
“My royal majesty WIT WITHOUT KNOWLEDGE.
Is very glad to see Wit without knowledge is a sort of cream which
Ye men of Coventry: gathers in a niglit to the top, and by a skilful hand
Good Lord, what fools ye be!" may be soon whipped into froth : but once scum
CLERICAL CIATTERING. med away, what appears underneath will be fit for
the Rev. S. S., sitting by a bronothing but to be thrown to the logs.
ther clergyman at dinner, observed afterwards, that SHIRT AND NO SHIRT.
bis dull neighbour had a “twelve parson power" of Foote having siguifed in his advertisement, while conversation.
PICTURE OF TARTARUS.
A FAIR FROLIC.
known by the sign of the Bagpipes One morning, In an old play, called the Four P's, by John Hey- after the rehearsal of a comedy which was to be perwood, the epigrammatist, is the following ludicrous formed for the first time that evening, he asked one of portraiture of the infernal regions, as described by his daughters, not ten years of age, how she liked the an adventurer who went thither to recover his lost piece. "Ah, papa, said the girl, you will go to night love :
and sup at the sign of the Bagpipes,” “ This devil and I walked arm in arm So far, 'till be had brought me thither, Where all the devils of hell together
In a letter from Mr. Hensbaw to Sir Robert Paston, Stood in array in such apparel,
afterwards earl of Yarmouth, dated October 13, 1670, As for that day there meetly fell.
we have the following account : "Last week, there Their horns were gilt, their claws full clean, being a faire neare Audley-end, the queen, the Their tails were kempt, and as I ween, duchess of Richmond, and the duchess of BuckingWith sothery butter their bodies anointed ; ham, had a frolick to disguise themselves like country I never saw devils so well appointed.
lasses, in red petticoats, wastcotes, &c. and, so goe The master-devil sat in his jacket,
see the faire. Sir Bernard Gossoign, on a cart jade, And all the souls were playing at racket. rode before the queen; another stranger before the None other rackets they had in hand,
duchess of Buckingham, and Mr. Roper before Save every soul a good fire brand ;
Richmond. They had all so overdone it in their Wherewith they play'd so prettily,
disguise, and looked so much more like antiques than That Lucifer laugh'd merrily.
country volk, that as soon as they came to the faire, And all the residue of the fiends
the people began to goe after them: but the queen Did laugh thereat full well like friends.
going to a booth to buy a pair of yellow stockings for But of my friend I saw no whit,
her sweethart, and Sir Bernard asking for a pair of Nor durst not ask for her as yet.
gloves stitched with blue for his sweethart, they Anon all this rout was brought in silence, were soon, by their gebrish, found to be strangers, And I by an usher brought to presence
which drew a bigger Bock about them; one amongst Of Lucifer; then low, as well I could, them had seen the queen at dinner, and knew her, I kneeled, which he so well allow'd
and was proud of his knowledge. This soon brought That thus he beck'd, and by St. Antony all the faire into a crowd to stare at the queeu. He smiled on me well-favour'dly,
Being thus discovered, they, as soon as they could, got Bending his brows as broad as barn-doors; to their horses ; but, as many of the faire that had Shaking his ears as rugged as burrs ;
horses, got up with their wives and children, sweetRolling his eyes as round as two bushels ; harts or neighbours, behind them, to get as much Flashing the fire out of his nostrils;
gape as they could, till they brought them to the Gnashing his teeth so vain-gloriously,
court gate. Thus, by ill conduct, was a merry frolick That methought time to fall to flattery, turned into pennance." Wherewith I told, as I shall tell ; Oh pleasant picture ! O prince of hell !" &c.
Lord Camden, when chief justice, was upon a visit
to Lord Dacre, at Alveley, in Essex, and had walked When Daucourt, the playwright, gave a new piece, out with a gentleman, a very absent man, to a hill if it were unsuccessful, to console himself
, he was ac- at no great distance from the honse, upon ihe top of customer to sup with two or three friends, at a tavern which stood the stocks of the village : he sat dowo
PUNISHMENT OF THE STOCKS.