Mar. Ay, Sir, I have them at my finger's ends:
I
go, am barren.

hand your

marry, now I let [Exit Maria. Sir To. O Knight, thou lack'ft a cup of canary: when did I fee thee fo put down?

Sir And. Never in your life, I think, unless you fee canary put me down: methinks, fometimes I have no more wit than a chriftian, or an ordinary man has; but I am a great eater of beef, and, I believe, that does harm to my wit.

Sir To. No question.

Sir And. An I thought that, I'd forfwear it. I'll ride home to-morrow, Sir Toby.

Sir To. Pourquoy, my dear Knight.

Sir And. What is pourquoy? do, or not do? I would, I had bestowed that time in the tongues that I have in fencing, dancing, and bear-beating. O, had I but follow'd the arts!

Sir To. Then hadft thou had an excellent head of hair.

t

Sir And. Why, would that have mended my hair? Sir To. Paft question; for * thou feeft, it will not curl by nature.

Sir And. But it becomes me well enough, does't

Sir To. Excellent! it hangs like flax on a distaff; › and I hope to fee a houfe-wife take thee between her legs, and spin it off.

Sir And. Faith, I'll home to-morrow, Sir Toby ;' your niece will not be seen, or, if fhe be, it's four to one fhe'll none of me: the Duke himfelf here, hard by, wooes her.

Sir To. She'll none o'th' Duke, fhe'll not match above her degree, neither in eftate, years, nor wit; I have heard her fwear it. Tut, there's life in't, man..

Sir And. I'll ftay a month longer, I'm a fellow o'th' *thou feeft, it will not cool my nature.] We fhould read, it will not curl by nature. The Joke is evident.

N4

ftrangeft

ftrangeft mind i'th' world: I delight in masks and revels fometimes altogether.

Sir To. Art thou good at thefe kick-fhaws, Knight? Sir And. As any man in Illyria, whatsoever he be, under the degree of my betters; and yet I will not compare with an old man,

J

Sir To. What is thy excellence in a galliard, Knight? Sir And. Faith, I can cut a caper.

Sir To. And I can cut the mutton to't.

Sir And. And, I think, I have the back-trick, fimply as ftrong as any man in Illyria.

E

Sir To. Wherefore are these things hid? wherefore have these gifts a curtain before them? are they like to take duft, like miftrefs Mall's picture? why doft thou not go to church in a galliard, and come home in a coranto? my very walk fhould be a jig! I would not fo much as make water, but in a fink-a-pace : what doft thou mean? is it a world to hide virtues in? I did think, by the excellent conftitution of thy leg, it was form'd under the ftar of a galliard.

Sir And. Ay, 'tis ftrong, and it does indifferent well in flame-colour'd ftocking. Shall we fet about fome revels?

Sir. To. What fhall we do elfe? were we not born under Taurus?

Sir And. Taurus? that's fides and heart.

Sir To. No. Sir, it is legs and thighs. Let me fee thee caper; ha! higher: ha! ha!

Val.

SCENE V.

Changes to the Palace.

-excellent.

[Exeunt.

Enter Valentine, and Viola in man's attire.

IF

F the Duke continue these favours towards you, Cefario, you are like to be much advanc'd; he hath known you but three days, and already you are no stranger.

Vio. You either fear his humour, or my negligence, that you call in queftion the continuance of his love. Is he inconftant, Sir, in his favours?

Val. No, believe me.

Enter Duke, Curio, and Attendants. Vio. I thank you: here comes the Duke. Duke. Who faw Cefario, hoa?

Vio. On your attendance, my Lord, here. Duke. Stand you a-while aloof.-Cefario, Thou know'ft no lefs, but all: I have unclafp'd To thee the book even of my secret soul. Therefore, good youth, addrefs thy gait unto her; Be not deny'd accefs, ftand at her doors, And tell them, there thy fixed foot shall grow, "Till thou have audience.

Vio. Sure, my noble Lord,

If fhe be fo abandon'd to her forrow
As it is spoke, she never will admit me.

Duke. Be clamorous, and leap all civil bounds,
Rather than make unprofited return.

Vio. Say, I do fpeak with her, my Lord; what then? Duke. Ó, then, unfold the paffion of my love, Surprize her with discourse of my dear faith; It fhall become thee well to act my woes; She will attend it better in thy youth, Than in a nuncio of more grave aspect. Vio. I think not fo, my Lord.

Duke. Dear lad, believe it:

For they shall yet belie thy happy years,
That fay, thou art a man: Diana's lip

Is not more smooth and rubious; thy fmall pipe
Is as the maiden's organs, fhrill, and found,
And all is femblative a woman's part.

I know, thy Conftellation is right apt
For this affair: fome four or five attend him;
All, if you will; for I myself am best
When least in company. Profper well in this,
N 5

And

And thou shalt live as freely as thy Lord,
To call his fortunes thine.

> Vio. I'll do. my best

To woo your Lady; yet, a barful strife!
Who-e'er I woo, myself would be his wife. [Exeunt.

SCENE VI. S

Changes to Olivia's House.

Enter Maria and Clown.

AY, either tell me where thou hast been,

Mar or I will not open my lips fo wide as a

briftle may enter, in way of thy excufe; my Lady will hang thee for thy abfence.

Clo. Let her hang me; he, that is well hang'd in this world, needs fear no colours.

Mar. Make That good.

Clo. He fhall fee none to fear..

Mar. A good lenten answer: I can tell thee where that faying was born, of, I fear no colours. Clo. Where, good mistress Mary?

Mar. In the wars; and that may you be bold to fay in your foolery.

Clo. Well, God give them wisdom that have it; and those that are fools, let them use their talents.

Mar. Yet you will be hang'd for being so long abfent, or be turn'd away; is not that as good as a hanging to you?

Clo. Marry, a good hanging prevents a bad marriage; and for turning away, let fummer bear it out. Mar. You are refolute then?

Clo. Not fo neither, but I am refolv'd on two points.

Mar. That if one break, the other will hold; or, if Both break, your gaskins fall.

Clo. Apt, in good faith; very apt: well, go thy

way,

way, if Sir Toby would leave drinking, thou wert as witty a piece of Eve's flesh as any in Illyria.

Mar. Peace, you rogue, no more o' that: here comes my Lady; make your excute wifely, you were beft.

[Exit.

SCENE

VII.

Clo.

WT

Enter Olivia, and Malvolio.

IT, and't be thy will, put me into a good fooling those wits, that think they have thee, do very oft prove fools; and I, that am sure I lack thee, may pafs for a wife man. For what fays Quinapalus, Better be a witty fool than a foolish wit. God bless thee, Lady!

Oli. Take the fool away.

Clo. Do you not hear, fellows? take away the Lady. Oli. Go to, y'are a dry fool; I'll no more of you; befides, you grow dishonest.

Clo. Two faults, Madona, that drink and good counsel will amend; for give the dry fool drink, then is the fool not dry: Bid the dishonest man mend himfelf; if he mend, he is no longer dishonest; if he cannot, let the botcher mend him. Any thing, that's mended, is but patch'd; virtue, that tranfgreffes, is but patch'd with fin; and fin, that amends, is but patch'd with virtue. If that this fimple fyllogifm will ferve, fo; if it will not, what remedy? as there is no true cuckold but calamity, fo beauty's a flower: the Lady bade take away the fool, therefore, I say again, take her away.

Oli. Sir, I bade them take away you.

Clo. Mifprifion in the highest degree.-Lady, Cucullus non facit monachum; that's as much as to fay, I wear not motley in my brain: good Madona, give me leave to prove you a fool.

Oli. Can you do it?