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sit Francis about.] here's buckram and canvas to scrub you to repentance.
Sir Fran. Sirrah, my cane shall teach you repentance presently.
Mar. No, faith, I have felt its twin brother from just such a wither'd hand too lately.
Miran. One thing more ; advise him to keep from the garden-gate on the left hand, for if he dare to saunter there, about the hour of eight, as he us’d to do, he shall be saluted with a pistol or a blunderbuss.
Sir Fran. Oh, monstrous! Why, Chargy, did he use to come to the garden-gate?
Miran. The gard'her described just such another man that always watch'd his coming out, and faini wou'd have brib'd him for his entrance-Tell him he shall find a warm reception if he comes this night.
Mar. Pistols and blunderbusses ! Egad a warm re„ception indeed! I shall take care to inform him of your kindness, and advise him to keep farther off.
Miran. I hope he will understand my meaning better than to follow your advice.
[ Aside. Sir Fran. Thou hast sign'd, seal’d, and ta'en pos. session of my heart for ever, Chargy, ha, ha, ha! and
for you, Mr. Saucebox, let me have no more of your
Sure I shall be out of your clutches one day-Well, Guardian, I say no more: but if you be not as arrant a cuckold as e'er drove bargain upon the Exchange, or paid attend.
ance to a court, I am the son of a whetstone; and so your humble servant.
[Exit. Miran. Mr. Marplot, don't forget the message : ha, ha, ha, ha! Mar. Nang, nang, nang!
[Exit. Sir Fran. I am so provok'd—'tis well he's gone.
Miran. Oh, mind him not, Gardy, but let's sign articles, and then
Sir Fran. And then-Adad I believe I am metamorphos’d, my pulse beats high, and my blood boils, methinks
[Kissing and hugging her. Miran. Oh, fie, Gardy! be not so violent: consider the market lasts all the year.-Well; I'll in, and see if the lawyer be come: you'll follow?
[Exit. Sir Fran. Ay, to the world's end, my dear! Well, Frank, thou art a lucky fellow in thy old age to have such a delicate morsel, and thirty thousand pounds, in love with thee. I shall be the envy of bachelors, the glory of married men, and the wonder of the town. some guardians would be glad to compound for part of the estate at dispatching an heiress, but I engross the whole. 01 mihi præteritos referet si Jupiter annos.
Changes to a tavern, discovers Sir George and CHARLIS
with wine before them, and Whisper waiting. Sir Geo. Nay, pr’ythee, don't be grave, Charles :
misfortunes will happen. Ha, ha, ha! 'tis some comfort to have a companion in our sufferings.
Cha. I am only apprehensive for Isabinda; her father's humour is implacable; and how far his jealousy may transport him to her undoing, shocks my soul to think
Sir Geo. But since you escap'd undiscover'd by him, his rage will quickly lash into a calm, never fear it.
Cha. But who knows what that unlucky dog, Marplot, told him, nor can I imagine what brought him hither: that fellow is ever doing mischief; and yet, to give him his due, he never designs it. This is some blundering adventure wherein he thought to shew his friendship, as he calls it! a curse on him!
Sir Geo. Then you must forgive him. What said he?
Cha. Said I nay, I had more mind to cut his throat, than to hear his excuses.
Sir Geo. Where is he?
Whisp. Sir, I saw him go into sir Francis Gripe's ? just now.
Cha. Oh! then he's upon your business, sir George: a thousand to one but he makes some mistake there
Sir Geo. Impossible, without he huffs the lady and makes love to Sir Francis.
Enter Drawer. Draw. Mr. Marplot is below, gentlemen, and desires to know if he may have leave to wait upon ye.
Cha. How civil the rogue is when he has done a fault!
Sir Geo. Ho! desire him to walk up. Pr’ythee, Charles, throw off this chagrin, and be good company.
Cha. Nay, hang him, I'm not angry with him. Whisper, fetch me pen, ink, and paper. Whisp. Yes, sir.
Enter. MARPLOT. Cha. Do but mark his sheepish look, sir George.
Mar. Dear Charles ! don't overwhelm a man already under insupportable affliction. I'ın sure I always intend to serve my friends, but if my malicious stars deny the happiness, is the fault mine ?
Sir Geo. Never mind him, Mr. Marplot; he's eat up with spleen. But tell me, what says Miranda?
Mar. Says !-nay, we are all undone there too.
Cha. I told you so ; nothing prospers that he un. dertakes.
Mar. Why, can I help her having chose your fa. ther for better for worse ?
Cha. So; there's another of Fortune's strokes. I suppose I shall be edged out of my estate with twins every year, let who will get 'em.
Sir Geo. What! is the woman really possess’d?
Mar. Yes, with the spirit of contradiction : she rail'd at you most prodigiously.
Sir Geo. That's no ill sign.
Enter Whisper with pen, ink, and paper. Mar. You'd say it was no good sign if you knew all. Sir Geo. Why, pr’ythee?
Mar. Hark ’e, sir George, let me warn you; pursue your old haunt no more; it may be dangerous.
[Charles sits down to write. Sir Geo. My old haunt! what do you mean?
Mar. Why in short then, since you will have it, Miranda vows if you dare approach the garden-gate at eight o'clock, as you us’d, you shall meet with a warm reception.
Sir Geo. A warm reception !
Mar. Ay, a very warm reception-you shall be saJuted with a blunderbuss, sir. These were her very words: nay, she bid me tell you so too.
Sir Geo. Hal the garden-gate at eight, as I us’d to do! There must be meaning in this. Is there such a gate, Charles ?
Mar. Is there such a gate, Charles?
Cha. Yes, yes, it opens into the Park: I suppose her ladyship has made many a scamper thro' it.
Sir Geo. It must be an assignation then. heart springs for joy; 'tis a propitious omen. My dear Marplot! let me embrace thee; thou art my friend, my better angel.
Mar. What do you mean, sir George ?
Sir Geo. No matter what I mean. Here, take a bumper to the garden-gate, you dear rogue you!