Wolf. He'll make a flat of himself in this barrister, he may, perhaps, take a trip to the ACT IV. SCENE I.-An apartment at BELVILLE'S. Enter MRS BELVILLE, and CAPTAIN SAVAGE. Mrs Bel. DON'T argue with me, captain Savage; but consider that I am a wife, and pity my distraction. Capt. Sav. Dear madam, there is no occasion to be so much alarmed. Mr Belville has very properly determined not to fight; he told me so himself, and should have been effectually prevented, if I hadn't known his resolution. Mrs Bel. There is no knowing to what extremities be may be provoked, if he meets Mr Leeson. I have sent for you, therefore, to beg, that you will save him from the possibility, either of exposing himself to any danger, or of doing an injury to his adversary. Capt. Sav. What would you have me do, madam? Mrs Bel. Fly to Hyde Park, and prevent, if yet possible, his meeting with Mr Leeson: do it, I conjure you, if you'd save me from desperation. Capt. Sav. Though you have no reason whatever to be apprehensive for his safety, madam, yet, since you are so very much affected, I'll immediately execute your commands. [Exeunt. her so! for, if she was not greatly distressed, it would be monstrously unnatural! Mrs Bel. O, Matilda !—my husband! my busband! my children! my children! Miss Wal. Don't weep, my dear! don't weep! pray, be comforted; all may end happily! Lady Rachel, beg of her not to cry so. Lady Rach. Why, you are crying yourself, Miss Walsingham; and, though I think it out of character to encourage her tears, I can't help keeping you company. Mrs Bel. O, why is not some effectual method contrived to prevent this horrible practice of duelling! Lady Rach. I'll expose it on the stage, since the law, now-a-days, kindly leaves the whole cognizance of it to the theatre. Miss Wal. And yet, if the laws against it were as well enforced as the laws against destroying the game, perhaps, it would be equally for the benefit of the kingdom. Mrs Bel. No law will ever be effectual till the custom is rendered infamous.-Wives must shriek !-mothers must agonize!-orphans must multiply! unless some blessed hand strips the fascinating glare from honourable murder, and bravely exposes the idol who is worshipped thus in blood! While it is disreputable to obcy the laws, we cannot look for reformation:- But, if the duelist is once banished from the presence of his sovereign;-if he is for life excluded the confidence of his country;-if a mark of indelible disgrace is stamped upon him, the sword of public justice will be the sole chastiser of wrongs; trifles will not be punished with death; and offences, really meriting such a punishment, will be reserved for the only proper avenger, the common executioner. [Exit CAPTAIN SAVAGE. Mrs Bel. Merciful Heaven! where is the generosity, where is the sense, where is the shame of men, to find a pleasure in pursuits, which they cannot remember without the deepest horror, which they cannot follow without the meanest fraud, and which they cannot effect, without consequences the most dreadful? The single word, Pleasure, in a masculine sense, comprehends every thing that is cruel! every thing that is base! and every thing that is desperate! Yet men, in other respects, the noblest of their species, make it the principal business of their lives, and do not hesitate to break in upon the peace of the happiest families, though their own must be necessarily exposed to destruction-> Bel- Miss Wal. Yes; and butcher each other like ville! Belville!-my life! my love!-The great-madmen, for fear their courage should be susest crime which a libertine can ever experience, pected by fools. is too despicable to be envied-'tis at best nothing but a victory over his own humanity; and, if he is a husband, he must be dead, indeed, if he is not doubly tortured upon the wheel of recollection. Lady Rach. I could not have expressed myself better on the subject, my dear: but, till such a hand as you talk of is found, the best will fall into the error of the times. Mrs Bel. No news yet from captain Savage? Lady Rach. He can't have reached Hyde-park yet, my dear. Miss Wal. Let us lead you to your chamber, my dear; you'll be better there. Enter MISS WALSINGHAM and LADY RACHEL where; but I'll attend you. Mrs Bel. Matilda, I must be wretched any MILDEW. Miss Wal. My dear Mrs Belville, I am extremely unhappy to see you so distressed! Lady Rach. Now, I am extremely glad to see Lady Rach. Thank Heaven I have no husband to plunge me into such a situation! Miss Wal. And, if I thought I could keep my resolution, I'd determine this moment on living single all the days of my life. Pray, don't spare my arm, my dear. [Exeunt. SCENE II.-Hyde-park. Enter BELVILLE. Bel. I fancy I am rather before the time of appointment; engagements of this kind are the only ones, in which, now-a-days, people pretend to any punctuality :-a man is allowed half an hour's law to dinner; but a thrust through the body must be given within a second of the clock. Enter LEESON. Lee. Your servant, sir.-Your name, I pose, is Belville? is too palpable to disarm my resentment; though I held you to be a man of profligate principles, I nevertheless considered you as a man of courage; but, if you hesitate a moment longer, by Heaven I'll chastise you on the spot! [Draws.] Bel. I must defend my life; though, if it did not look like timidity, I would inform you-[They fight; LEESON is disarmed.]--Mr Leeson, there is your sword again. Lee. Srike it through my bosom, sir!—I don't desire to out-live this instant! Bel. I hope, my dear sir, that you will long live happy!-as -as your sister, though, to my shame, I can claim no merit on that account, is recoversup-ed, unpolluted, by her family: but, let me beg, that you will now see the folly of decisions by the sword, when success is not fortunately chained to the side of justice. Before I leave you, receive my sincerest apologies for the injuries I have done you; and, be assured, no occurrence will ever give me greater pleasure, than an opportunity of serving you, if, after what is past, you shall, at any time, condescend to use me as a friend. Bel. Your supposition is very right, sir; and, I fancy, I am not much in the wrong, when I suppose your name to be Leeson. Lee. It is, sir: I am sorry I should keep you here a moment. Bel. I am very sorry, sir, you should bring me here at all! Lee. I regret the occasion, be assured, sir; but, 'tis not now a time for talking; we must proceed to action. Bel. And yet, talking is all the action I shall proceed to, depend upon it. Lee. What do you mean, sir? Where are your pistols? Bel. Where I intend they shall remain, till my next journey into the country; very quietly over the chimney in my dressing-room. Lee. You treat this matter with too much levity, Mr Belville; take your choice of mine, sir. Bel. I'd rather take them both, if you please; for, then, no mischief shall be done with either of them. Lee. Sir, this trifling is adding insult to injury; and shall be resented accordingly. Did not you come here to give me satisfaction? Bel. Yes; every satisfaction in my power. · Lee. Take one of these pistols, then. Bel. Come, Mr Leeson, your bravery will not at all be lessened by the exercise of a little understanding: If nothing less than my life can atone for the injury I have unconsciously done you, fire at me instantly, but don't be offended because I decline to do you an additional wrong. Lee. 'Sdeath, sir, do you think I come here with an intention to murder? Bel. You come to arm the guilty against the innocent, sir; and that, in my opinion, is the most atrocious intention of murder! Lee. How's this!-- Bel. Look'e, Mr Leeson, there's your pistol[Throws it on the ground.] I have already acted very wrongly with respect to your sister; but, sir, I have some character (though, perhaps, little enough) to maintain, and I will not do a still worse action, in raising my hand against your life. Lee. This hypocritical cant of cowardice, sir, [Exit BEL. Lee. Very well-very well-very well.Enter CONNOLLY. What! you have been within hearing, I suppose? Con. You may say that. Lee. And is not this very fine? Con. Why, I can't say much as to the finery of it, sir; but it is very foolish. Lee. And so this is my satisfaction, after all! Con. Yes; and pretty satisfaction it is! When Mr Belville did you but one injury, he was the greatest villain in the world; but, now, that he has done you two, in drawing his sword upon you, suppose he is a very worthy gentleman. Lee. To be foiled, baffled, disappointed in my revenge!-What though my sister is by accident unstained, his intentions are as criminal as if her ruin was actually perpetrated; there is no possibility of enduring this reflection!--I wish not for the blood of my enemy, but I would, at least, have the credit of giving him life. Con. Arrah, my dear, if you have any regard for the life of your enemy, you should not put him in the way of death. Lee. No more of these reflections, my dear Connolly; my own feelings are painful enough, Will you be so good as to take these damned pistols, and go with ine to the coach? Con. Troth, and that I will! but don't make yourself uneasy; consider that you have done every thing which honour required at your hands, Lee. I hope so. Con. Why, you know so: you have broke the laws of Heaven and earth, as nobly as the first lord in the land; and you have convinced the world, that when any body has done your family one injury, you have courage enough to do it another yourself, by hazarding your life. Lee. Those, Conolly, who would live reputas Enter Miss WALSINGHAM. Miss Wal. Gentlemen, your most obedient; bly in any country, must regulate their conduct, in many cases, by its very prejudices.—Custom, with respect to duelling, is a tyrant, whose des potism no body ventures to attack, though every-general, I intended writing to you about a body detests its cruelty. Con. I did not imagine that a tyrant of any kind would be tolerated in England. But where do you think of going now? For chambers, you know, will be most delightfully dangerous, till you have come to an explanation with Mr Torrington. Lee. I shall go to Mrs Crayons. Con. What the gentlewoman that paints all manner of colours in red chalk? Lee, Yes; where I first became acquainted with Emily. Con. And where the sweet creature has met you two or three times, under pretence of sitting for her picture? Lee. Mrs Crayons will, I dare say, oblige me, in this exigency, with an apartment for a few days. I shall write, from her house, a full explanation of my conduct to Mr Torrington, and let him know where I am; for the honest old man must not be the smallest sufferer, though a thousand prisons were to stare me in the face.But come, Connolly, we have no time to lose -Yet, if you had any prudence, you would abandon me in my present situation. Con. Ah, sir, is this your opinion of my friendship? Do you think that any thing can ever give me half so much pleasure in serving you, as seeing you surrounded by misfortunes? [Exeunt. SCENE III.-Changes to an apartment at BEL VILLE'S. Spruce. Miss Walsingham will wait on you immediately, gentlemen. trifling mistake; but, poor Mrs Belville has been so very ill, that I could not find an opportunity. Gen. Sav. I am very sorry for Mrs Belville's illness; but I am happy, madan, to be personally in the way of receiving your commands; and I wait upon you with Mr Torrington, to talk about a marriage-settlement. Miss Wal. Heavens, how shall I undeceive him! [Aside. Tor. 'Tis rather an aukward business, Miss Walsingham, to trouble you upon; but as the general wishes that the affair may be as private as possible, he thought it better to speak to yourself, than to treat with any other person. Gen. Sav. Yes, my lovely girl; and, to convince you that I intended to carry on an honourable war, not to pillage like a free-booter, Mr Torrington will be a trustee. Miss Wal. I am infinitely obliged to your intention, but there's no necessity to talk about my settlement-for Gen. Sav. Pardon, me, madam!-pardon me, there is-besides, I have determined that there shall be one, and what I once determine, is absolute.-A tolerable hint for her own behaviour, when I have married her, Torrington. [Aside to TOR. Miss Wal. I must not shock him before Mr Torrington. [Aside.] General Savage, will you give me leave to speak a few words in private to you? Gen. Sav. There's no occasion for sounding a retreat, madam. Mr Torrington is acquainted with the whole business; and I am determined, for your sake, that nothing shall be done without him. Tor. I can have no objection to your hearing the lady ex parte, general. Miss Wal. What I have to say, sir, is of a very particular nature. Gen. Sav. Very well. Spruce. [Aside.] What can old Holofernes want so continually with Miss Walsingham? [Exit SPRUCE. Gen. Sav. When I bring this sweet mild creature home, I shall be able to break her spirit to my own wishes-I'll inure her to proper discipline from the first moment, and make her trem-is ble at the very thought of mutiny. Tor. Ah, general, you are wonderfully brave, when you know the meekness of your adversary. Gen. Sav. Envy, Torrington-stark, staring envy:Few fellows, on the borders of fifty, have so much reason as myself, to boast of a blooming young woman's partiality. Tor. On the borders of fifty, man!-beyond the confines of threescore. Gen. Sav. The more reason I have to boast of my victory, then; but don't grumble at my triumph: you shall have a kiss of the bride: let that content you, Torrington, Tor. [Rising.] I'll leave the room, then. Gen. Sav. Opposing him.] You shan't leave the room, Torrington. Miss Walsingham shall have a specimen of my command, even before marriage; and you shall see, that every woman not to bully me out of my determination. [Aside to Tor. Miss Wal. Well, general, you must have your own way. Gen Sav. [To TOR.] Don't you see that 'tis only fighting the battle stoutly at first, with one of these gentle creatures? Tor. [Significantly.] Ah, general! Gen. Sav. I own, madam, your situation is a distressing one; let us sit down-let us sit downMiss Wal. It is unspeakably distressing, indeed, sir. Tor. Distressing, however, as it may be, we must proceed to issue, madam; the general pro poses your jointure to be one thousand pounds a-year. Miss Wal. General Savage! Gen. Sav. You think this too little, perhaps? Miss Wal. I can't think of any jointure, sir. Tor. Why, to be sure, a jointure is, at best, but a melancholy possession, for it must be purchased by the loss of the husband you love! Miss Wal. Pray, don't name it, Mr Torrington! Gen. Sav. [Kissing her hand.] A thousand thanks to you, my lovely girl! Miss Wal. For Heaven's sake, let go my hand! Gen. Sav. I shall be mad 'till it gives me legal possession of the town! Miss Wal. Gentlemen-general-Mr Torrington, I-beg you'll hear me? Gen. Sav. By all means, my adorable creature! I can never have too many proofs of your disinterested affection. Miss Wal. There is a capital mistake in this whole affair I am sinking under a load of distress! Gen. Sav. Your confusion makes you look charmingly, though. Miss Wal. There is no occasion to talk of jointure, or marriages to me; I am not going to be married. Tor. What's this? Miss Wal. Nor have I an idea in nature, however enviable I think the honour, of being your wife, sir. Gen. Sav. Madam! Tor. Why, here's a demur! Miss Wal. I am afraid, sir, that, in our conversation this morning, my confusion, arising from the particularity of the subject, has led you into a material misconception. Gen. Sav. I am thunder-struck, madam! I could not mistake my ground. Tor. As clear a nol. pros. as ever was issued by an attorney-general. Gen. Sav. Surely you can't forget, that, at the first word, you hung out a flag of truce; told me even, that I had a previous friend in the fort; and did not so much as hint a single article of capitulation? Tor. Now for the rejoinder to this replication! Miss Wal. All this is unquestionably true, general, and perhaps a good deal more; but in reality, my confusion before you on this subject to-day was such, that I scarcely knew what I said; I was dying with distress, and at this moment am very little better. Permit me to retire, general Savage, and only suffer me to add, that though I think myself highly flattered by your addresses, it is impossible for me ever to receive them. Lord! Lord! I am glad 'tis over in [Exit. Tor. Why, we are a little out of this matter, general; the judge has decided against us, when we imagined ourselves sure of the cause. any manner. Gen. Sav. The gates shut in my teeth, just as I expected the keys from the governor! Tor. I am disappointed myself, man; I shan't have a kiss of the bride. Gen. Sav. At my time of life, too! Tor. I said, from the first, you were too old for her. Gen. Sav. Zounds! to fancy myself sure of her, and to triumph upon a certainty of victory! Tor. Ay, and to kiss her hand in a rapturous return for her tenderness to you :-let me advise you never to kiss before folks, as long as you live again. Gen. Sav. Don't distract me, Torrington! a joke, where a friend has the misfortune to lose the battle, is a downright inhumanity. Tor. You told me, that your son had accused her of something that you would not bear; suppose we call at his lodgings? he, perhaps, as an amicus curia, may be able to give us a little information. Gen. Sav. Thank you for the thought-But keep your finger more than ever upon your lips, dear Torrington. You know how I dread the danger of ridicule; and it would be too much, not only to be thrashed out of the field, but to be laughed at into the bargain. Tor. I thought, when you made a presentment of your sweet person to Miss Walsinghamn, that the bill would be returned ignoramus. [Exeunt, SCENE IV.-BELVILLE'S. MRS BELVILLE, and LADY RACHEL MILDEW, discovered on a sopha. Lady Rach. You heard what captain Savage said? Mrs Bel. I would flatter myself, but my heart will not suffer it; the Park might be too fuil for the horrid purpose, and perhaps they are gone to decide the quarrel in some other place. Lady Rach. The captain inquired of numbers in the Park, without hearing a syllable of them, and is therefore positive, that they are parted without doing any mischief. Mrs Bel. I am, nevertheless, torn by a thousand apprehensions; and my fancy, with a gloomy kind of fondness, fastens on the most deadly. This very morning, I exultingly numbered myself in the catalogue of the happiest wives. Perhaps I am a wife no longer-perhaps, my little innocents, your unhappy father is this moment breathing his last sigh, and wishing, O, how vainly! that he had not preferred a guilty pleasure to his own life, to my eternal peace of mind, and your felicity! Enter SPRUCE. Spruce. Madam! madam! my master! my master! Mrs Be. Is he safe? Enter BELVILLE, Bel. My love! Mrs Bel. O, Mr Belville! Lady Rach. There she revives. [Faints. Bel. The angel softens! how this rends my heart! Mrs Bel. O, Mr Belville, if you could conceive the agonies I have endured, you would avoid the possibility of another quarrel as long as you lived, out of common humanity. Bel. My dearest creature, spare these tender reproaches! you know not how sufficiently I am punished to see you thus miserable. Lady Rach. That's pleasant indeed, when you have yourself deliberately loaded her with affiliction. Bel. Pray, pray, lady Rachel, have a little mercy! Your poor humble servant has been a very naughty boy-but if you only forgive him this single time, he will never more deserve the rod of correction. Mrs Bel. Since you are returned safe, I am happy. Excuse these foolish tears; they gush in spite of me. Bel. How contemptible do they render me, my love! Lady Rach. Come, my dear, you must turn your mind from this gloomy subject. Suppose we step up stairs, and communicate our pleasure to Miss Walsingham? Mrs Bel. With all my heart! Adieu, recreant! [Ereunt MRS BEL. and LADY RACH. Bel. I don't deserve such a woman, I don't deserve her. Yet, I believe, I am the first husband that ever found fault with a wife for having too much goodness. Enter SPRUCE. What's the matter? Spruce. Your sister Bel. What of my sister? Spruce. There is a letter left, sir, in which she says, that her motive was dislike to a match with captain Savage, as she has placed her affections unalterably on another gentleman. Bel. Death and damnation! Spruce. Mrs Moreland, your mother, is in the greatest distress, sir, and begs you will immediately go with the servant that brought the message; for he, observing the young lady's maid carrying some bundles out, a little suspiciously, thought there must be some scheme going on, and dogged a hackney coach, in which Miss Moreland went off, to the very house where it set her down. Bel. Bring me to the servant, instantly-but don't let a syllable of this matter reach my wife's ears her spirits are already too much agitated. [Erit. Spruce, Zounds! we shall be paid home for the tricks we have played in other families. [Exit. SCENE II.-Changes to CAPTAIN SAVAGE'S lodgings. Enter CAPTAIN SAVAGE, Capt. Sav. The vehemence of my resentment against this abandoned woman has certainly led me too far. I should not have acquainted her with my discovery of her baseness—no; if I had acted properly, I should have concealed all knowledge of the transaction till the very moment of her guilt, and then burst upon her when she was solacing with her paramour, in all the fulness of security. Now, if she should either alter ber mind, with respect to going to the masquerade, or go in a different habit, to elude my observation, I not only lose the opportunity of exposing her, but give her time to plan some plausible excuse for her infamous letter to Belville. Enter a Servant. Ser. General Savage and Mr Torrington, sir. Capt. Sav. You blockhead! why did you let them wait a moment?-What can be the meaning of this visit? [Exit Servant. Enter GENERAL SAVAGE, and TORRINGTON. Gen. Sav. I come, Horace, to talk to you about Miss Walsingham. Capt. Sav. She's the most worthless woman existing, sir: I can convince you of it. Gen. Sav. I have already changed my own opinion of her. Capt. Sav. What, you have found her out yourself, sir? Tor. Yes he has made a trifling discovery. Gen. Sav. 'Sdeath! don't make me contemptible to my son. [Aside to Tor Capt. Sav. But, sir, what instance of her precious behaviour has come to your knowledge? For an hour has scarcely elapsed, since you thought her a miracle of goodness. Tor. Ay, he has thought her a miracle of goodness within this quarter of an hour. Gen. Sav. Why, she has a manner that would impose upon all the world. Capt. Sav. Yes, but she has a manner also to undeceive the world thoroughly. Tor. That we have found pretty recently. However, in this land of liberty, none are to be pronounced guilty, 'till they are positively convicted: I can't, therefore, find against Miss Walsingham, upon the bare strength of presumptive evidence. Capt. Sav. Presumptive evidence!—hav'n't I promised you ocular demonstration? Tor. Ay, but till we receive this demonstra tion, my good friend, we cannot give judgment. Capt. Sav. Then I'll tell you at once, who is the object of her honourable affections. Gen. Sav. Who-who? Capt. Sav. What would you think if they were placed on Belville? |