collected at the noise I made. I believe they thought me mad.

"What are you staring at, you fools? Did you never see a man in a passion before?-When does the stage. coach leave here for London, rascal ?"

"Not till the afternoon, sir."

"Hell and the devil!. Get me some breakfast." And I strode out into the road to cool myself.

There is nothing better than a comfortable fit of swearing to settle one's passion, and sweeten the mind for reflection-it is like thunder-the storm once over, the air is the purer for it. I sat down upon a large stone, and began to ponder the actions of the past evening. The first question that I asked myself was :-" Do I know my own intentions ?" 66 No," was the ready answer. I had no need of questioning further:-I had acted with my usual thoughtlessness. Now what were my intentions? I reflected a little longer, and came to the conclusion, that, as I had left London for nothing, I must return to it for something,and I flattered myself that all kinds of employments lay waiting my pleasure, like the mistresses of the Grand Signior, and I had only to throw the handkerchief to embrace which I pleased.

Consider, Reader-I was very young, very sanguine, and very ignorant of the world.

I SHOULD have set out for London directly after breakfast; but my host kept no horses, and I considered it unmeet for a man of my purse to journey eight miles on foot.

The proverb tells us "Delays are dangerous. They certainly are often important, as the reader may gather from what happened in my case.

It was late in the afternoon, and when I was anxiously watching, from a window, for the coming of the London stage, that a storm, which had been brewing the whole day, broke forth with no common violence. Now, of all torments under heaven, defend me from a bad day at a country inn. I love a storm as well as any body, when it comes at a proper time-that is to say, at any time when I have nothing else to do but to enjoy it--, and when I am posted in a proper place-videlicet, any place which is suited to such romantic contemplation: but, when one is anxious only to continue one's journey, to be mewed up in a nasty inn-with a sanded floor beneath one's feet instead of the smooth greed sward, and the dull road to gaze upon instead of the living VOL. I.

22

ocean, and in an air perfumed with tobacco-smoke and brandy instead of the "fragrance of the grove"-it is enough to try the temper of an angel.

"How provoking!" I exclaimed, turning my back to

the window.

"How lucky!" cried my landlord, rubbing his hands with delight.

To a man in my mood this was no trifle.

"Pray, Mr. Impertinence," said I, making my purse rattle in my pocket-" is this the way you treat those who spend money at your house?"

"Lord bless us !" exclaimed my host with affected hu mility-though the rogue was evidently sinothering a laugh-" how wonderful hot you young gentlemen are! John Spits is not the man to insult a gentleman who spends his money like a prince, not he, sir!—Why, sir, was only glad of the storm, may it please you, sir.”

I

“And what right have you to be glad, you scoundrel, when your guests are sorry?"

"O Lord, O Lord! the gentleman's a mind to be wag. gish, la! My guests and I, sir, are always of a different way of thinkin'; theyr'e always for gittin' out, you see, sir, and I'm always for keepin' 'em in,—that's the difference, sir! and this storm's the very thing to drive folks to "The Bull"-couldn't any thing be luckier. Bless me, here comes some now!"—and, sure enough, the sound of wheels was heard, and presently a man and woman entered the room.

The day had been so chilly as to render a fire indispensable. "Wont you and the lady, sir, draw nearer the fire?" asked my host of the Bull, sedulously dusting a seat with his apron.

*"Not so, brother sinner," answered the man, in a true nasal cant:" let us first praise the Lord for his goodness

*Before the Reader rashly ventures to condenin what follows, let him turn to the note on page 315 (infra): -I would not have my motiyes misconstrued, even for one moment.

I hate, from my very heart, apologies of any kind; but the age is in fault, not I..

to our blessed souls. What signifies a little heat to our earthly bodies, when hell-fire and the bottomless pit of per-dition is y-aw-ning and g-a-p-ing beneath us to suck in our immortal souls? O, dear sinners, my heart is bleeding for you!—Now is the accepted time'—make a godly peace with Jerusalem, while the harvest is yet unreaped. Pray with me, blessed sinners! that the Lord may avert his flaming wrath from all of us, and especially from this here young man, who is now on the high road to damnation, following the lewd fashions and other cursed contrivances of the devil to lead precious souls into the burning lake of hell!"—and the fellow laid his hand on my collar to enforce his admonitions. This was a kind of behaviour to which I had not been accustomed; so, pushing him aside, I deliberately turned my back upon him.

"What animal is this?" I asked of the landlord.

"It's old Malachi Snubbs, the famous travelling preacher, sir," answered the landlord.

"He's a madman !" I exclaimed.

"He's a travelling preacher," said the landlord; and muttering something about "no money" and "oceans of prayers and groans," my host of the Bull called to his wife" Mrs. Spits! Mrs. Spits, I say!-Here, Mrs. Spits, help the lady off with her cloak and bonnet."

"Stop, sister Spits," whined the preacher; "What are the things of this world to the sweet and comfortable drawings out of the spirit? It is better for her to go to heaven with her cloak and bonnet on, than to hell without them.'

But sister Spits had already relieved the female of her wet apparel, and a person was thus revealed that made me start with amazement.

The preacher himself was a man of the most vulgar description. His figure was diminutive, flat, and shape. less-with the shoulders so high as almost to touch the

ears.

As for the head-if the Reader will purchase a

moderate-sized cocoa-nut, and hold it in a transverse direction, with the spots which children call the monkey's face turned towards him, he will be able to form a pretty good idea of its proportions and physiognomical beauty, Moreover to the picture thus presented, let him add a complexion spotted with innumerable freckles, and a scalp thinly plastered with carrot-coloured hair, and he will have before him the godly presence of brother Ma lachi Snubbs, itinerant preacher of the word for the whole of England. Seeing the man such as I have described him, I naturally concluded his companion would prove a bird of the same feather; instead of which, my eyes rested on a lady of the most striking appearance.

She was dressed with that affected contempt of ornament which marked the sect to which she, doubtless, belonged. Her figure was tall and commanding, and, though not youthful, might well be termed handsome. Her countenance, more remarkable for the character than the regularity of its features, wore now a pensiveness of expression, amounting almost to melancholy, that harmonized well with its extreme paleness, and the simplicity with which the dark hair was parted on her queenly forehead. But my highest praise is given to her person, when I say it was distinguished for that indescribable some. thing, which, with me, is better than any beauty,-I mean, that air which had marked her the lady under any circumstances. It is probable that the preacher's disgusting vulgarity added, in no small degree, to this attractiveness in the female.

I was musing upon the singularity of her situation, when I felt myself rudely grasped by the arm. and confronted brother Malachi Snubbs.

"Sinner!" said the fellow,

unto the devil?"

66

I turned

"do you know you
are nigh

Verily, I believe that I am, brother Snubbs," I an swered, mimicking his bagpipe utterance"I pray you, therefore, let me get further off."