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Sim. O, lud! this is charming—hush! I am -I seed the degger yesterneet, and I thought I gone.

(Going. should ha'e killed every one that came in my Dick. Well, but hark ye, Simon, come hither way. what money have you about you, Master Mat Irish. Stand out of the way, lads, and see me thew ?

give a touch of Othollo, my dear. [Takes the Sim. But a tester, Sir.

cork, burns it, and blacks his face.] The devil Dick. A tester! that's something of the least, burn the cork, it would not do it fast enough. Master Matthew, let 's see it.

I Mem. Here, here, I'll lend you a helping hand. Sim. You have had fifteen sixpences now.

(Blacks him; knocking at the door. Dick. Never mind that I'll pay you all at Pres. Open locks, whoever knocks. my benefit. Sim. I don't doubt that, master

-but mum.

Enter Dick.

[Erit. Dick. How now, ye secret, black, and midnight Dick. Thus far we run before the wind. hags ? What is't ye do? How fare the honest An apothecary ! -make an apothecary of me! partners of my heart? What bloody scene has

-what, cramp my genius over a pestle and Roscius now to act ? Arrah, my dear cousin mortar, or mew me up in a shop, with an alligator Mackshane, won't you put a remembrance on stuffed, and a beggarly account of empty boxes! me? to be culling simples, and constantly adding

Irish. Ow! but is it mocking you are ? Look to the bills of mortality !

-No, no! it will be ye, my dear, if you'd be taking me off—don't you much better to be pasted up in capitals—The part call it taking off ?-by my shoul, I'd be making of Romeo by a young gentleman who never ap- you take yourself off. What, if you're for being peared on any stage before !—My ambition fires obstroporous, I would not matter you three skips at the thought. -But hold, mayn't I run some of a flea. chance of failing in my attempt ;-hissed, pelted,

Dick. Nay, pr’ythee, no offence, I hope we laughed at, not admitted into the Green-room.-shall be brother players. That will never do Down, busy devil, down,

Irish. Ow! then we'd be very good friends; down. Try it again. Loved by the women, en ) for you know two of a trade can never agree, my vied by the men, applauded by the pit, clapped by i dear. the gallery, admired by the boxes.—" Dear colonel, Dick. What do you intend to appear in? is not he a charming creature ?"—"My lord, don't Irish. Othollo, my dear; let me alone; you'll you like him of all things ?"—"

'_“Makes love see how I'll bodder 'em; though by my shoul, mylike an angel!”—“What an eye he has !"-"Fine self does not know but I'll be frightened when legs!"-"I'll certainly go to his benefit.”—Ce every thing is in a hub-bub, and nothing to be lestial sounds! And then I'll get in with all heard, but “ Throw him over:” “Over with the painters, and have myself put up in every print- him:" "Off, off

, off the stage:" " Music.” Ow! shop-in the character of Macbeth! “ This is a but may be the dear craturs in the boxes will be sorry sight.” (Stands in an attitude.) In the lucking at my legs, ow! to be sure, the devil burn character of Richard—“Give me another horse ; the luck they'll give 'em. bind up my wounds.”—This will do rarely Dick. I shall certainly laugh in the fellow's And then I have a chance of getting well married face.

Aside. ---0, glorious thought ! By heaven I will Scots. Stay till you hear me gi'e a speecimen of enjoy it, though but in fancy. But what's elocution. o'clock ?-it must be almost nine. I'll away at once: Dick. What, with that impediment, Sir? this is club-night.—'Egad, I'll go to them for Scots. Impeediment! what impeediment? I awhile.— The spouters are all met-little they do not leesp, do I ? I do not squeent; I am well think I'm in town-they'll be surprised to see me. leemed, am I not?

-Off I go, and then for my assignation with my Irish. By my shoul, if you go to that, I am as Master Gargle's daughter -poor Charlotte! well timbered myself as any of them, and siiall

she's locked up, but I shall find means to make a figure in genteel and top comedy, settle matters for her escape; she's a pretty thea. Scots. I'll give you a speecimen of Mocbeeth. trical genius.—If she flies to my arms like a hawk Irish. Make haste then, and I'll begin Othollo. to its perch, it will be so rare an adventure, and so Scots. Is this a dagger that I see before me, &c. dramatic an incident.

Irish. [Collaring him.) William, be sure you Limbs! do your office, and support me well ;

prove my love a whore, &c. Bear me but to her, then fail me if you can. [Another MEMBER comes forward, with his


face powdered, and a pipe in his hand.

Mem. I am thy father's spirit, Hamlet-

Irish. You are my father's spirit ? My mo

ther was a better man than ever you was. SCENE 1.- Discovers the Spouting Club. Dick. Pho! pr’ythee! you are not fat enough The PRESIDENT and MEMBERS seated.

for a ghost.

Mem. I intend to make my first appearance in Pres. Come, we'll fill a measure the table round. it for all that; only I'm puzzled about one thing, I Now good digestion wait on appetite, and health want to know, when I come on first, whether 1 on both. Come give us a speech.

should make a bow to the audience? Scots. Come now, I'll gi'e you a touch of Moc Watch. (Behind the scenes.] Past five o'clock, beeth.

cloudy morning. 1 Mem. That will be rare. Come, let's have it. Dick. Hey! past five o'clock; 'sdeath, I snall

Scots. What dost lier at, mon? I have had miss my appointment with Charlotte; I have muckle applause at Edinburgh, when I enacted in staid too long, and shall lose my proselyte. Come, he Reegiceede; and now I intend to do Mocbeeth let us adjourn. We'll scower the watch; confu Vol. I....K


sion to morality; I wisa the constable were mar Char. Dear heart, don't let us stand fooling ried.--Huzza ! huzza !

here, as I live and breathe we shall both be taken; All. Huzza, Huzza !

[Ereunt. do, for heaven's sake, let us make our escape.

Dick. Yes, my dear Charlotte, we will go to SCENE II.--A Street.

gether; Enter Dick, with a lantern and ladder.

Together to the theatre we'll go,

There to their ravish'd eyes our skill we'll show, Dick. All's quiet here; the coast's clear-now And point new beauties-to the pit below. for my adventure with Charlotte; this ladder will

[Erit with CHARLOTTE do rarely for the business, though it would be bet Sim. And I to sweep my master's shop will go. ter if it were a ladder of ropes—but hold; have I (Exit into the house, and shuts the door. not seen something like this on the stage ? yes I have, in some of the entertainments. Ay, I remem

Enter a WATCHMAN. ber an apothecary, and here about he dwells—this is my Master Gargle's; being dark, the beggar's

Watch. Past six o'clock, and a cloudy morning shop is shut; what, ho! apothecary! but soft, Gargle's window! I must alarm the family-Ho!! what's here ? A ladder at Master what light breaks through yonder window? It is

Master Gargle! the east, and Juliet is the sun; arise, fair sun, &c.

(Knocks at the door.

Gar. (Above.) What's the matter? How comes Charlotte appears at a window.

this window to be open ? Ha! a ladder! Who's

below there? Char. Who's there ; my Romeo ?

Watch. I hope you an't robbed, Master Gargle? Dick. The same, my love, if it not thee displease. As I was going my rounds, I found your window Char. Hush! not so loud; you'll waken my

open father.

Gur. I fear, that is some of that young dog's Dick. Alas! there is more peril in thine eye

tricks. Take away the ladder; I must inquire Char. Nay, but prythee now : I tell you, you'll into all this.

[Erit. spoil all.

What made you stay so long ?
Dick. Chide not, my fair; but let the god of

Re-enter Simon'like Scrub. love laugh in thy eyes, and revel in thy heart.

Sim. Thieves! murder! thieves! popery! Char. As I am a living soul, you'll ruin every

Watch. What's the matter with the fellow? thing; be but quiet, and I'll come down to you.

Sim. Spare all I have, and take my life! (Going

Watch. Any mischief in the house ? Dick. No, no, not so fast; Charlotte, let us act

Sim. They broke in with fire and sword; the garden scene firstChar. A fiddlestick for the garden scene.

they'll be here this minute.

Watch. What, are there thieves in the house? Dick. Nay, then, I'll act Ranger; up I go, Sim. With sword and pistol, Sir. neck or nothing

Watch. How many are there of them? Char. Dear heart, you're enough to frighten a

Sim. Five-and-forty. body out of one's wits. Don't come up; I tell

Watch. Nay, then 'tis time for me to go. you there's no occasion for the ladder." 'I have

[Erit. settled every thing with Simon, and he's to let me through the shop, when he opens it.

Enter GARGLE. Dick. Well, but I'tell you I would not give a farthing for it without the ladder, and so up I go; Gar. Dear heart! dear heart! she's gone, she's if it was as high as the garret, up I go.

gone !--my daughter, my daughter !. What's

the fellow in such a fright for? Enter Simon, at the door.

Sim. Down on your knees, down on your Sim. Sir, Sir; Madam, Madam

marrow-bones, down on your marrow-bones. Dick. Pr’ythee be quiet, Simon, I am ascending all in a fermentation.

Gar. Get up, you fool, get up. Dear heart, I'm the high top-gallant of my joy. Sim. An't please you, master, my young mis

Enter WINGATE. tress may come through the shop; I am going to sweep it out, and she may escape that way fast

Win. So, friend Gargle, -you're up early, I

see-nothing like rising early-nothing to be got Char. 'That will do purely; and so do you stay by lying in bed, like å lubberly fellow-what's where you are, and prepare to receive me.

the matter with you? ha! ha! you look like a

(Exit from above. ha! ha! Sim. Master, leave that there, to save me from Gar. Ok-no wonder—my daughter, my being respected.

daughter! Dick. With all my heart, Simon.

Win. Your daughter! what signifies a foolish Enter CHARLOTTE.

Gar. Oh dear heart! dear heart !--out of the Char. O, lud ! I'm frightened out of my wits; window. feel with what a pit-a-pat action my heart beats. Win. Fallen out of the window !-well, she was

Dick. 'Tis an alarm to love; quick, let me a woman, and 'tis no matter-if she's dead, she's snatch thee to thy Romeo's arms, &c.

provided for.--Here, I found the book-could not Watch. (Behind the scenes.] Past six o'clock, meet with it last night.-Here, friend Gargle, and a cloudy morning.

take the book, and give it that scoundrel of a fel. Dick. Is that the raven's voice I hear?

low. Sim. No, master, it's the watchman's.

Gar. Lord, Sir, he's returned to his tricks.


girl ?

that way.

Win. Returned to his tricks !-what, -broke Gar. Do, my dear Sir, let us step to bim. loose again?

Win. No, not I, let him stay there this it Gar. Ay, and carried off my daughter with him. is to have a genius—ha! ha! genius! ha!

Win. Carried off your daughter-how did the ha !--a genius is a fine thing indeed !--ha! ha! rascal contrive that ?

(Exit. Gar. Oh, dear Sir,-the watch alarmed us Gar. Poor man! he has certainly a fever on awhile ago, and I found a ladder at the window- his spirits--do you step in with me, honest man, so I suppose my young Madam made her escape till I'slip on my coat, and then I'll go after this

unfortunate boy. Win, I'll never see the fellow's face.

Por. Yes, Sir,—'tis in Gray's Inn-lane. Sim. Secrets! secrets !

(Exeunt. Win. What, are you in the secret friend? Sim. To be sure, there be secrets in all fami

SCENE III.-Spunging House. lies—but, for my part, I'll not speak a word pro Dick and Bailiff at a table, and CHARLOTTE or con, till there's a peace.

sitting in a disconsolate manner by him. Win. You won't speak, Sirrah!- I'll make you speak-do you know nothing of this, num. Bail. Here's my service to you, young gentlescall ?

man-don't be uneasy-the debt is not muchSim. Who I, Sir ?-he came home last night why do you look so sad ? from your house, and went out again directly. Dick. Because captivity has robbed me of a just Win. You saw him then

and dear diversion. Sim. Yes, Sir,--saw him to be sure, Sir-he Bail. Never look sulky at me-l never use made me open the shop-door for him-he stopped any body ill-come, it has been many a good on the threshold, and pointed at one of the clouds, man's lot-here's my service to you—but we've and asked me if it was not like an ouzel ? no liquor-come, we'll have t'other bowl.

Win. Like an ouzel-wounds! what's an ouzel? Dick. I've now not fifty ducats in the world

Gar. And the young dog came back in the yet still I am in love, and pleased with ruin. dead of night, to steal away my daughter.

Bail. What do you say?-you've fifty shillings, Enter a PORTER.

I hope.

Dick. Now, thank heaven! I'm not worth a Win. Who are you, pray ?—what do you want? groat. Por. Is one Mr. Gargle here?

Bail. Then there's no credit here, I can tell Gar. Yes who wants him ?

you that-you must get bail, or go to NewgatePor. Here's a letter for you.

who do you think is to pay house-rent for you?Gar. Let me see it. Oh, dear heart !—[Reads.] Such poverty-struck devils as you shan't stay in To Mr. Gargle, at the Pestle and Mortar" my house-you shall go to quod, I can tell you slidikins, this is a letter from that unfortunate that. (Knocking at the door.] Coming, coming,

I am coming— shall lodge you in Newgate, 4 Win. Let me see it, Gargle. [Reads. promise you, before night, -not worth a groat !To Mr. Gargle, &c.

you're a fine fellow to stay in a man's houseMost potent, grave, and reverend doctor, my very you shall go to quod.

[Exit. noble and approved good master, that I have to'en Dick. Come, clear up, Charlotte, never mind away your daughter it is most true, true I will marry this—come, now, let us act the prison-scene in her ---'tis true, 'tis pity, and pity 'tis, 'tis true." the Mourning Bride. What in the name of common sense is all this? “

Char. How can you think of acting speeches, have done your shop some service, and you know it ; when we're in such distress ? no more of that-yet I could wish, that at this time I had not been this thing,"— what can the fellow mean?

Dick. Nay, but my dear angel- " for time may have yet one fated hour to come,

Enter WINGATE and GARGLE. which, winged with liberty, may overtake occasion past."-Overtake occasion past?- no, no, time and Come, now we'll practise an attitude-how many tide wait for no man—“ I expect redress from thy of 'em have you ? noble sorrowsthine and my poor country's ever,

Char. Let me see,--one-two-three-and

“ R. WINGATE." then in the fourth act, and then-0 gemini, I Mad as a March hare! I have done with him-have ten at least. let him stay till the shoe pinches, a crack-brained Dick. That will do swimmingly– I've a round numscull.

dozen myself-come, now begin-you fancy me Por. An't please ye, Sir, I fancies the gentle- dead, and I think the same of you--now mind. man is a little beside himself-he took hold un me

[They stand in attitudes. here by the collar, and called me villain, and bid Win. Only mind the villain. me prove his wife a whore-Lord help him, I Dick. O thou soft fleeting form of Lindamira ! never see'd the gentleman's spouse in my born Char. Illusive shade of my beloved lord ! days before.

Dick. She 'ives, she speaks, and we shall still Gar. Is she with him now?

be happy! Por. I believe so there is a likely young wo Win. You lie, you villain, you shan't be happy, man with him, all in tears.

(Knocks him down. Gar. My daughter, to be sure.

Dick. (On the ground.) Perdition catch your Por. I fancy, master, the gentleman's under arm, the chance is thine. troubles-1 brought it from a spunging-house. Gar. So, my young madam—I have found you Win. From a spunging-house!

again. Por. Yes, Sir, in Gray's Inn-lane.

Dick. Capulet, forbear; Paris, let loose your Win. Let him ie there, let him lie there I am hold—she is my wife-our hearts are twined to glad of it,


young fellow.

Win. Sirrah! villain! I'll break every bone in | A paltry, scribbling fool-to leave me out your body.

[Strikes him. He'll say, perhaps he thought I could not spout Dick. Parents have flinty hearts, no tears can Malice anà envy to the last degree ! move 'em : children must be wretched.

And why ?- I wrote a farce as well as he; Win. Get off the ground, you villain ; get off And fairly ventur'd it, without the aid the ground.

Of prologue dress'd in black, and face in masque Dick. 'Tis a pity there are no scene-drawers to

rade, lift me.

O pit !-have pity-see how I'm dismay'd! Win. 'Tis mighty well, young man-zookers Poor soul !--this canting stuff will never do, I made my own fortune; and I'll take a boy out Unless, like Bayes, he brings his hangman too. of the Blue-coat Hospital, and give him all I have. But granting that from these same obsequies, Look ye here, friend Gargle.—You know I'm not Some pickings to our bard in black arise ; a hard-hearted man—the scoundrel, you know, Should your applause to joy convert his fear, nas robbed me; so d'ye see, I won't hang him, - As Pallas turns to feast-Lordella's bier ; I'll only transport the fellow-and so, Mr. Catch Yet 'twould have been a better scheme by half, pole, you may take him to Newgate.

T' have thrown his weeds aside, and learn'd with Gar. Well, but, dear Sir, you know I always

me to laugh. intended to marry my daughter into your family; I could have shown him, had he been inclin'd, and if you let the young man be ruined, iny mo- A spouting junto of the female kind. ney must all go into another channel.

There dwells a milliner in yonder row, Win. How's that ?-into another channel! Well dress'd, full voiced, and nobly built for show, must not lose the handling o his money-Why, Who, when in rage, she scolds at Sue and Sarah I told you, friend Gargle, I'm not a hard-hearted Damn'd, damn'd, dissembler: thinks she's Madam man. Ha! ha!-why, if the block head would

Zara. but get as many crabbed physical words from She has a daughter too, that deals in lace, Hippocrites and Allen, as he has from his non- And sings–O ponder well—and Chery Chace, sensical trumpery,-ha! ha! - I don't know, be And fain would fill the fair Ophelia's place. tween you and I, but he might pass for a very And in her cock’d-up hat, and gown of camlet, good physician.

Presumes on something-touching the Lord Dick. And must I leave thee, Juliet?

Hamlet. Char. Nay, but, pr’ythee now have done with A cousin too she has, with squinting eyes, your speeches you see we are brought to the last With waddling gait, and voice like London distre and so you had better make it up.


(Apart to Dick. Who, for the stage too short by half a story, Dick. Why, for your sake, my dear, I don't Acts Lady Townly—thus—in all her glory. care if I do. (Apart.}-Sir, you shall find for the And while she 's traversing the scanty room, future, that we'll both endeavour to give you all Cries—"Lord, my lord, what can I do at home ?? the satisfaction in our power.

In short, there's girls enough for all the fellows, Win. Very well, that is right.

The ranting, whining, starting, and the jealous, Dick. And since we don't go on the stage, 'tis The Hotspurs, Romeos, Hamlets, and Othellos. some comfort that the world's a stage, and all the Oh! little do those silly people know men and women merely players.

What dreadful trials actors undergo. Some play the upper, some the under, parts, Myself, who most in harmony delight, And most assume what 's foreign to their hearts; Am scolding here from morning, until night. Thus life is but a tragic-comic jest,

Then take advice from me, ye giddy things, And all is farce and mummery at best. (Ereunt. Ye royal milliners, ye apron'd kings;

Young men, beware, and shun your slippery


Study arithmetic, and burn your plays. ORIGINALLY SPOKEN BY MRS. CLIVE.

And you, ye girls, let not our tinsel train

Enchant your eyes, and turn your madd’ning Enters, reading a Play-Bill.

brain; A VERY pretty bill,,-as I'm alive!

Be timely wise, for oh! be sure of this, l'he part of_Nobody-by Mrs. Clive! A shop with virtue is the height of bliss,






It has been observed, that Rowe seldom moves either pity or terror, but often elevates the sentiments; he seldom pierces the breast, but always delights the ear, and often improves the understanding. This excellent tragedy is always acted with great applause, and will, in one instance at least, prove the author's power to excite a powerful effect : consisting chiefly of domestic scenes and private distress, the play before us is an affecting appeal to pity, specially in the parting of Alicia and Hastings, the interview between Jane Shore and Alicia, and in the calagkrophe. In the plot, Rowe has nearly followed the history of this misguided and unhappy fair one, and has produced an impressive moral lesson.

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The last remaining male of princely York,

(For Edward's boys, the state esteems not of 'em,) SCENE I.- The Tower.

And therefore on your sov’reignty and rule Enter the Duke of Gloster, Sir RICHARD Rat. The commonweal does her dependence make, CLIFFE, and CaresBY.

And leans upon your highness' able hand.

Cates. And yet to-morrow does the council meet, Glos. Thus far success attends upon our councils, To fix a day for Edward's coronation. And each event has answer'd to my wish; Who can expound this riddle ? The queen and all her upstart race are quelld; Glos. That can I. Dorset is banishd, and her brother Rivers, Those lords are each one my approv'd good friends, Ere this, lies shorter by the head at Pomfret. Of special trust and nearness to my bosom ; The nobles have, with joint concurrence, nam'd me And, howsoever busy they may seem, Protector of the realm: my brother's children, And diligent to bustle in ihe state, Young Edward and the little York, are lodg'd Their zeal goes on no further than we lead, Here, safe within the Tower. How say you, Sirs, And at our bidding stays. Does not this business wear a lucky face?

Cates. Yet there is one, The sceptre and the golden wreath of royalty And he amongst the foremost in his power, Seem hung within my reach.

Of whom I wish your highness were assur'a Sir R. Then take 'em to you,

For me, perhaps it is my nature's fault, And wear them long and worthily; you are I own I doubt of his inclining much.

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