Lord T. Fine presence of mind, faith!-The True French nonchalance--But, good folks, why such a deal of rout and tapage about nothing at all? If Mademoiselle Harriet had rather be Mrs. Oakly than Lady Trinket- -Why, I wish ner joy-that's all.-Mr. Russet, I wish you joy of your son-in-law-Mr. Oakly, I wish you joy of the lady-and you, Madam, [To HARRIET.] of the gentleman--And, in short, I wish you all joy of one another, 'pon honour. [Exit. Rus. There's a fine fellow of a lord now! The devil's in your London folks of the first fashion, as you call them. They will rob you of your estate, debauch your daughter, or lie with your wife-and all as if they were doing you a favour -'pon honour! Maj. O. Hey! what now? [Bell rings violently. Re-enter OAKLY. Oak. D'ye hear, major, d'ye hear? Maj. O. Zounds! what a clatter!-She'll pull down all the bells in the house. Oak. My observations since I left you, have confirmed my resolution. I see plainly that her good humour, and her ill humour, her smiles, her tears, and her fits, are all calculated to play upon me. Maj. O. Did not I always tell you so? It's the way with them all-they will be rough and smooth, and hot and cold, and all in a breath.I Any thing to get the better of us. Oak. She is in all moods at present, I promise you-There has she been in her chamber, fuming and fretting, and dispatching a messenger to me every two minutes-servant after servant-now she insists on my coming to her-now again she writes a note to entreat-then Toilet is sent to Oak. My dear, consider where you are- Mrs. O. But I'll disappoint you, for I shall remain in it, to support my due authority—as for you, Major Oakly Maj. O. Hey-day! what have I done? Mrs. O. I think you might find better employ ment, than to create divisions between married people--and you, Sir!— Oak. Nay but, my dear! Mrs. O. Might have more sense as well as tenderness, than to give ear to such idle stuff. Oak. Lord, Lord! Mrs. O. You and your wise counsellor there, I suppose, think to carry all your points with me Oak. Was ever any thing Mrs. O. But it wont do, Sir. You shall find that I will have my own way, and that I will govern my own family. Oak. You had better learn to govern yourself, by half. Your passion makes you ridiculous. Did ever any body see so much fury and violence; affronting your best friends, breaking my peace, what? for nothing. 'Sdeath, Madam! at these and disconcerting your own temper. And all for years you ought to know better. Mrs. O. At these years!-Very fine!--Am to be talked to in this manner? Oak. Talked to!-Why not?--You have death-and I have taken it all, in hopes of making talked to me long enough-almost talked me to you quiet-but all in vain. Patience, I find, is all thrown away upon you; and henceforward, come what may, I am resolved to be master of my own house. Sir; and you'll take care to have mistresses enough Mrs. O. So, so!-Master, indeed!-Yes, too, I warrant you. Oak. Perhaps I may; but they shall be quiet let me know that she is ill, absolutely dying Oak. Retreat!-Retreat!-no, no!-I'll preserve the advantage I have gained, I am determined. Maj. O. Ay, ay!-keep your ground-fear nothing-up with your noble heart!-Good discipline makes good soldiers; stick close to my advice, and you may stand buff to a tigress Oak. Here she is, by Heavens! now, brother! Mrs. O. I think, Mr. Oakly, you might have had humanity enough to have come to see how I did. You have taken your leave, I suppose, of all tenderness and affection-but I'll be calm-I'll not throw myself into a passion-You want to drive me out of your house-I see what you aim at, and will be aforehand with you-let me keep my temper! I'll send for a chair, and leave the house this instant. Oak. True, my love: I knew you would not think of dining in your chamber alone, when I had company below. You shall sit at the head of the table, as you ought, to be sure, as you say, and make my friends welcome. Mrs. O. Indeed!-And do you think I am such a tame fool, as to sit quietly and bear all this behaviour- -You shall find that I have a spirit-Oak. Of the devil. it. Mrs. O. Intolerable!-You shall find then that will exert that spirit. I am sure I have need of As soon as the house is once cleared again, I'll shut my doors against all company.-You sha'n't see a single soul for this month. Oak. 'Sdeath, Madam, but I will!-I'll keep open house for a year.I'll send cards to the whole town-Mr. Oakly's rout!-All the world will come-and I'll go among the world too-I'll be mewed up no longer. Mrs. O. Provoking insolence! this is not to be endured- -Lookye, Mr. Oakly Oak. And lookye, Mrs. Oakly, I will have my own way. Mrs. O. Nay, then, let me tell you, Sir- Mrs. O. Why, you wont let me speak. Mrs. O. Was there ever such a monster! I can bear this no longer. [Bursts into tears.] O Mrs. O. Excellent raillery! Lookye, Mr. you vile man! I can see through your designOakly, I see the meaning of all this affected cool-you cruel, barbarous, inhumansuch usage to ness and indifference. your poor wife!- -you'll be the death of her. Oak. She sha'n't be the death of me, I am de- | should find my young Madam with my young Cermined. Sir here. Mrs. O. That it should ever come to this! -To be contradicted-[Sobbing.-insultedabused-hated- 'tis too much-my heart will burst with-oh-oh ! [Falls into a fit. HARRIET, CHARLES, &c. Oak. [Interposing.] Let her alone. Char. For Heaven's sake, Sir, she will be- Har. Pray, my dear Sir, let us assist her. She may Oak. I don't care. Let her alone, I say. Mrs. O. [Rising.] O, you monster!-you villain!-you base man! Would you let me die for want of help?-would you? Oak. Bless me, Madam, your fit is very violent; take care of yourself. Mrs. O. With Charles, did you say, Sir? Rus. Ay, with Charles, Madam. The young rogue has been fond of her a long time, and she of him, it seems. Mrs. O. I fear I have been to blame. Aside Rus. I ask pardon, Madam, for the disturbance I made in your house. Har. And the abrupt manner in which I came into it demands a thousand apologies. But the occasion must be my excuse. Mrs. O. How have I been mistaken! [Aside.] But did not I overhear you and Mr. Oakly[TO HARRIET. Har. Dear Madam, you had but a partial bearing of our conversation. It related entirely sc this gentleman. Char. To put it beyond doubt, Madam, Mr. Russet and my guardian have consented to our Mrs. O. Despised, ridiculed; but I'll be re- marriage; and we are in hopes that you will not venged, you shall see, Sir. Oak, Tol-de-rol lol-de-rol lol-de-rol lol. [Singing Mrs. O. What, am I made a jest of Exposed to all the world? If there's law or justice Oak. Tol-de-rol lol-de-rol lol-de-rol lol. [Singing. Mrs. O. I shall burst with anger. Have a eare, Sir; you may repent this. Scorned and made ridiculous! No power on earth shall hinder my revenge! [Going. Har. [Interposing.] Stay, Madam. Mrs. O. Let me go: I cannot bear this place. Har. Let me beseech you, Madam, Maj. O. Courage, brother! you have done wonders. [Apart. Oak. I think she'll have no more fits. Apart. Har Stay, Madam; pray stay one moment. I have been a painful witness of your uneasiness, and in great part the innocent occasion of it. Give me leave then Mrs. O. I did not expect, indeed, to have found you here again. But, however Har. I see the agitation of your mind, and it makes me miserable. Suffer me to tell the real truth. I can explain every thing to your satis faction. Mrs. O. May be so: I cannot argue with you. Char. Pray, Madam, hear her; for my sake, for your own-dear Madam! Mrs. O. Well, well, proceed. Har. I understand, Madam, that your first alarm was occasioned by a letter from my father to your nephew. Rus. I was in a bloody passion, to be sure, Madam! The letter was not over civil, I believe. I did not know but the young rogue had ruined my girl. But it's all over now, and so withhold your approbation. Mrs. O. I have no further doubt. I see you are innocent, and it was cruel to suspect you. You have taken a load of anguish off my mind; and yet your kind interposition comes too late; Mr. Oakly's love for me is entirely destroyed. [Weeping. [Apart [Apart. Oak. I must go to her. Maj. O. Not yet, not yet. Har. Do not disturb yourself with such apprehensions; I am sure Mr. Oakly loves you most affectionately. Oak. I can hold no longer. [Going to her.] My affection for you, Madam, is as warm as ever. My constrained behaviour has cut me to the soul, for it was all constrained, and it was with the utmost difficulty that I was able to support it. Mrs. O. O, Mr. Oakly, how have I exposed myself! What low arts has my jealousy induced me to practise! I see my folly, and fear that you can never forgive me. Oak. Forgive you! This change transports me!-Brother! Mr. Russet! Charles! Harriet! give me joy! I am the happiest man in the world! Maj. O. Joy, much joy to you both! though, by the by, you are not a little obliged to me for it. Did not I tell you I would cure all the disorders in your family? I beg pardon, sister, for taking the liberty to prescribe for you. My medicines have been somewhat rough, I believe, but they have had an admirable effect, and so don't be angry with your physician. Mrs. O. I am indeed obliged to you, and I feelOak. Nay, my dear, no more of this. All that's past must be utterly forgotten. Mrs. O. I have not merited this kindness; but it shall hereafter be my study to deserve it. Away with all idle jealousies! And since my suspicions have hitherto been groundless, I am resolved for Mrs. O. You was here yesterday, Sir? [Exeunt. THIS piece is said to have arisen from a remark of Dean Swift to Mr. Gay," that a Newgate Pastoral might make a pretty sort of thing." It had a run of 63 nights, in its first season, (1727) and spread rapidly, with equal sueBess, throughout Wales, Scotland, and Ireland. The card-table and the drawing-room echoed with its praise; the ladies had the songs engraven on their fans; even screens and other pieces of furniture were decorated with them. The profits were so considerable, both to the Author, (who was called the Orpheus of Highwaymen,) and to Mr. Rich, the Manager, as to produce the saying, that it had "made Rich gay, and Gay rich." Miss Fenton, who acted Polly, became the idol of the town and of the Duke of Bolton, by marriage with whom she attained the highest rank a female subject can acquire. This fortunate opera has been generally thought to give vice additional attraction, by exhibiting it in a pleasing form; in this respect, the example of the hero and its general influence have probably been much over-rated; but the scruples of the present refined age may well hesitate to admit the moral pretensions of this work. Instead of approbation merely as a powerful attack on the absurdities of the Italian opera,* it now charms by the native beauty of the old airs, and the professional abilities of the performers. * This effeminacy had been recently imported from Italy, and infected the fashionable world; to oppose this. Mr. Gay, in his "Beggar's Opera," drew up the nervous old ballad of Britain, against the soft, unnatural, Italian stanza, and took his airs from our most popular songs. "An Italian, (says Mr Ireland, in his, Hogarth Illus trated ') concluded an harangue calculated to throw Gay's talents and taste into contempt, with-Saire, this simple signor did tri to pelt mi countrymen out of England with lumps of pudding;' one of Gay's tunes 653 55* Filch. Sir, Black Moll has sent word, her trial comes on in the afternoon, and she hopes you will order matters so as to bring her off. Peach. Why, as the wench is very active and industrious, you may satisfy her that I'll soften the evidence. Filch. Tom Gagg, Sir, is found guilty. Peach. A lazy dog! When I took him, the time before, I told him what he would come to, if he did not mend his hand. This is death, without reprieve. I may venture to book him; [Writes.] for Tom Gagg, forty pounds. Let Betty Sly know, that I'll save her from transportation, for 1 can get more by her staying in England. Filch. Betty hath brought more goods to our lock this year, than any five of the gang; and, in truth, 'tis pity to lose so good a customer. Peach. If none of the gang takes her off, she may, in the common course of business, live a twelvemonth longer. I love to let women 'scape. A good sportsman always lets the hen-partridges fly, because the breed of the game depends upon them. Besides, here the law allows us no reward: there is nothing to be got by the death of women-except our wives. Filch. Without dispute, she is a fine woman! 'Twas to her I was obliged for my education. To say a bold word, she has trained up more young fellows to the business than the gamingtable. Peach. Truly, Filch, thy observation is right. We and the surgeons are more beholden to wowen, than all the professions besides. Filch. 'Tis woman that seduces all mankind; By her we first were taught the wheedling arts; [kind, Her very eyes can cheat; when most she's She tricks us of our money, with our hearts. For her, like wolves, by night, we roam for prey, [charms; And practice every fraud to bribe her For, suits of love, like law, are won by pay, And beauty must be fee'd into our arms. Peach. But make haste to Newgate, boy, and let my friends know what I intend; for I love to make them easy, one way or another. Filch. When a gentleman is long kept in suspense, penitence may break his spirit ever after. Besides, certainty gives a man a good air upon me, his trial, and makes him risk anotner, without fear or scruple. But I'll away, for 'tis a pleasure to be a messenger of comfort to friends in afflic tion. [Erit. Peach. But it is now high time to look about for a decent execution against next sessions I hate a lazy rogue, by whom one can get nothing till he is hanged. A register of the gang: [Read ing.] Crook-fingered Jack—a year and a half in the service- -let me see, how much the stock owes to his industry;-One, two, three, four, five gold watches, and seven silver ones. A mighty clean-handed fellow! sixteen snuff-boxes, five of them of true gold, six dozen of handkerchiefs, four silver-hilted swords, half a dozen of shirts, three tie-perriwigs, and a piece of broadcloth. Consider ing these are only the fruits of his leisure hours, I don't know a prettier fellow; for no man alive road.-Wat Dreary, alias Brown Will-an irhath a more engaging presence of mind upon the regular dog; who hath an underhand way of disposing of his goods; I'll try him only for a session or two longer, upon his good behaviour.without the least genius! that fellow, though he Harry Paddington-a poor petty-larceny rascal, were to live these six months, will never come to the gallows with any credit.-Slippery Sam-he goes off the next sessions; for the villain hath the impudence to have views of following his trade as a tailor, which he calls an honest emmonth ago; a promising, sturdy fellow, and dili ployment.-Mat-o'-the-Mint-listed not above a gent in his way; somewhat too bold and hasty and may raise good contributions on the public, if he does not cut himself short by murder.-Ton Tipple-a guzzling, soaking sot, who is always stand; a cart is absolutely necessary for him. too drunk to stand himself, or to make others Robin of Bagshot, alias Gorgon, alias Bluf Bob, alias Carbuncle, alias Bob Booty Enter MRS. PEACHUM, Mrs. P. What of Bob Booty, husband? I hope nothing bad hath betided him.—You know, my dear, he's a favourite customer of mine-'twas he made me a present of this ring. Peach. I have set his name down in the black list, that's all, my dear; he spends his life among women, and, as soon as his money is gone, one of other of the ladies will hang him for the reward, and there's forty pounds lost to us for ever! Mrs. P. You know, my dear, I never meddle to you. Women, indeed, are bitter bad judges in in matters of death; I always leave those affairs these cases; for they are so partial to the brave, that they think every man handsome, who is going to the camp or the gallows. But really husband, you should not be too hard-hearted, for you never had a finer, braver set of men than at present. We have not had a murder among them all these seven months; and truly, my dear, this is a great blessing. Peach. What a dickens is the woman always whimpering about murder for? No gentleman is ever looked upon the worse for killing a man in his own defence; and if business cannot be car ried on without it, what would you have a gentle man do? so, my dear, have done upon this subject. Was Captain Macheath here, this morning, for the bank-notes he left with you last week? Mrs. P. Yes, my dear; and though the bank has stopped payment, he was so cheerful and so I see. They are of sure sale from our warehouse at Redriff, among the seamen. Filch. And this snuff-box. agreeable! Sure, there is not a finer gentleman | made a tolerable hand on't-These seven handupon the road than the captain? if he comes from kerchiefs, Madam. Bagshot, at any reasonable hour, he hath pro- Mrs. P. Coloured ones, mised to make one this evening, with Polly, me, and Bob Booty, at a party at quadrille. Pray, my dear, is the captain rich? Peach. The captain keeps too good company ever to grow rich. Mary bone and the chocolatehouses are his undoing. The man that proposes to get money by play, should have the education of a fine gentleman, and be trained up to it from his youth. Mrs. P. Really, I am sorry, upon Polly's account, the captain hath not more discretion. What business hath he to keep company with lords and gentlemen? he should leave them to prey upon one another. Peach. Upon Polly's account! what a plague doth the woman mean?-Upon Polly's account! Mrs. P. Captain Macheath is very fond of the girl. Peach. And what then? Mrs. P. If I have any skill in the ways of women, I am sure Polly thinks him a very pretty man. Peach. And what then? you would not be so mad as to have the wench marry him! Gamesters and highwaymen are, generally, very good to their mistresses, but they are very devils to their wives. Mrs. P. But if Polly should be in love, how should we help her, or how can she help herself? Poor girl, I'm in the utmost concern about her! Peach. Look ye, wife, a handsome wench, in our way of business, is as profitable as at the bar of a Temple coffee-house, who looks upon it as her livelihood, to grant every liberty but one. My daughter to me should be like a court lady to a minister of state, a key to the whole gang. Married! if the affair is not already done, I'll terrify her from it, by the example of our neighbours. Mrs. P. Mayhap, my dear, you may injure the poor girl: she loves to imitate the fine ladies, and she may only allow the captain liberties, in the view of interest. Peach. But 'tis your duty, my dear, to warn the girl against her ruin, and to instruct her how to make the most of her beauty. I'll go to her this moment, and sift her. In the meantime, wife, rip out the coronets and marks of these dozen of cambric handkerchiefs, for I can dispose of them this afternoon to a chap in the city. [Exit. Mrs. P. Never was a man more out of the way in an argument than my husband. Why must our Polly, forsooth, differ from her sex, and love only her husband? and why must Polly's marriage, contrary to all observation, make her the less followed by other men? All men are thieves in love, and like a woman the better for being another's property. Enter FILCH. Come hither, Filch.-I am as fond of this child, as though my mind misgave me he were my own. He hath as fine a hand at picking a pocket as a wornan, and is as nimble-fingered as a juggler. If an unlucky session does not cut the rope of thy life, I pronounce, boy, thou wilt be a great man in history. Where was your post last night, my boy? Filch. I plied at the opera, Madam; and, considering 'twas neither dark nor rainy, so that there was no great hurry in getting chairs and coaches, Mrs. P. Set in gold! a pretty encouragement this to a young beginner! Filch. I had a fair tug at a charming gold watch. Plague take the tailors, for making the fobs so deep and narrow!-it stuck by the way, and I was forced to make my escape under a coach. Really, Madam, I fear I shall be cut off in the flower of my youth, so that every now and then, since I was pumped, I have thoughts of taking up, and going to sea. Mrs. P. You should go to Hockley-in-the-hole, and to Marybone, child, to learn valour; these are the schools that have bred so many brave men. I thought, boy, by this time, thou hadst lost fear as well as shame. Poor lad! how little does he know yet of the Old Bailey! For the first fact, I'll insure thee from being hanged; and going to sea, Filch, will come time enough, upon a sentence of transportation. But, hark you, my lad, don't tell me a lie; for you know I hate a liar.Do you know of any thing that hath passed be tween Captain Macheath and our Polly? Filch. I beg you, Madam, don't ask me; for I must either tell a lie to you, or to Miss Polly; for I promised her I would not tell. Mrs. P. But when the honour of our family is concerned. Filch. I shall lead a sad life with Miss Polly, if ever she comes to know I told you. Besides, I would not willingly forfeit my own honour, by betraying any body. Mrs. P. Yonder comes my husband and Polly. Come, Filch, you shall go with me into my own room, and tell me the whole story. I'll give thee a glass of a most delicious cordial that I keep for my own drinking. [Exeunt. Enter PEACHUM and POLLY. Polly. I know as well as any of the fine ladies how to make the most of myself, and of my man too. A woman knows how to be mercenary, though she hath never been in a court or at an assembly. We have it in our nature, papa. If I allow Captain Macheath some trifling liberties, I have this watch and other visible marks of his favour to show for it. A girl who cannot grant some things, and refuse what is most material will make but a poor hand of her beauty, and soon be thrown upon the common. Virgins are like the fair flower in its lustre, Near it the bees in play flutter and cluster, And gaudy butterflies frolic around. But when once pluck'd 'tis no longer alluring, To Covent Garden 'tis sent (as yet sweet,) There fades, and shrinks, and grows past all en. during, Rots, stinks, and dies, and is trod under feet. Peach. You know, Polly, I am not against your toying and trifling with a customer, in the way of business, or to get out a secret or so; but if I find out that you have played the fool, and are married, you jade you, I'll cut your throat, hussy. Now, you know my mind. |