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Dr. C. Which opinion is immoveable.

Char. No rock so firm! Dr. C. I am afraid then it will be a vain pursuit, when I solicit you, in compliance with my worthy friend's desire and my own inclinations, to become my partner in that blessed estate in which we may be a eomfort and support to each other.

Char. I would die rather than consent to it.
Dr. C. In other words, you hate me.

Char. Most transcendently.

Dr. C. Well, there is sincerity at least in your confession you are not, I see, totally deprived of all virtue, though I must say I never could perceive in you but very little.

Char. Oh, fie! you flatter me.

Dr. C. No; I speak it with sorrow, because you are the daughter of my best friend. But how are we to proceed now? are we to preserve temper? Char. Oh! never fear me, sir, I shall not fly out, being convinced that nothing gives so sharp a point to one's aversion as good breeding; as, on the con.. trary, ill manners often hide a secret inclination.

Dr. C. Well then, young lady, be assured so far am I from the unchristian disposition of returning injuries that your antipathy to me causes no hatred in my soul towards you; on the contrary, I would willingly make you happy, if it may be done according to my conscience, with the interest of heaven in view.

Char. Why, I can't see, sir, how heaven can be any way concerned in a transaction between you and

me.

Dr. C. When you marry any other person, my consent is necessary.

Char. So I hear, indeed! but pray, doctor, how could your modesty reccive so insolent a power, without putting my poor father out of countenance with your blushes?

Dr. C. I sought it not; but he would crowd it among other obligations. He is good natured; and I foresaw it might serve to pious purposes. Char. I don't understand you.

Char. Once in your life, perhaps, you may, Dr. C. Nay, let us be plain. Would you marry him?

Char. You're mighty nice, methinks. Well, I would,
Dr. C. Then I will not consent.
Char. You won't?

Dr. C. My conscience will not suffer me. I know you to be both luxurious and worldly-minded; and you would squander upon the vanities of the world, those treasures which ought to be better laid out.

Char. Hum !---I believe I begin to conceive you. Dr. C. If you can think of any project to satisfy my conscience, I am tractable. You know there is a considerable moiety of your fortune which goes to my lady in case of our disagreement.

Char. That's enough, sir.-You think we should have a fellow feeling in it. At what sum do you rate your concurrence to my inclinations? that settled, I am willing to strike the bargain.

Dr. C. What do you think of half?
Char. How! two thousand pounds?

Dr. C. Why, you know you gain two thousand pounds; and really the severity of the times for the poor, and my own stinted pittance, which cramps my charities, will not suffer me to require less.

Char. But how is my father to be brought into this?

Dr. C. Leave that to my management. Char. And what security do you expect for the money'

Dr. C. Oh! Mr. Darnley is wealthy: when I deliver my consent in writing, he shall lay it down to me in bank-bills.

Char. Pretty good security!-On one proviso though.

Dr. C. Name it.

Char. That you immediately tell my father that you are willing to give up your interest to Mr. Darnley.

Dr. C. Hum!-stay-I agree to it; but in the mean time, let me warn you, child, not to expect to turn that, or what has now passed between us, to my

Dr. C. I take it for granted, that you would marry confusion, by sinister construction, or evil representMr. Darnley. Am I right?

ation to your father. I am satisfied of the piety of

my own intentions, and care not what the wicked think of them; but force me not to take advantage of sir John's good opinion of me, in order to shield myself from the consequences of your malice.

Char. Oh! I shall not stand in my own light: I know your conscience and your power too well, dear doctor!

Dr. C. Well, let your interest sway you. Thank heaven, I am actuated by more worthy motives. Char. No doubt on't.

Dr. C. Farewell, and think me your friend. [Exit. Char. What this fellow's original was, I know not; but from his conscience and cunning, he would make an admirable Jesuit.

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I'm a breaking my heart——I think it a sin to keep a shop.

Old Lady L. Why, if you think it a sin, indeedpray what's your business?

Maw. We deals in grocery, tea, small-beer, charcoal, butter, brickdust, and the like.

Old Lady L. Well, you must consult with your friendly director here.

Maw. I wants to go a preaching.

Old Lady L. Do you?

Maw. I'm almost sure I have had a call..
Old Lady L. Ay!

Maw. I have made several sermons already; I does them extrumpery, because I can't write; and now the devils in our alley says, as how my head's turned.

Old Lady L. Ay, devils indeed--but don't you mind them.

Maw. No, I don't I rebukes them, and preaches to them, whether they will or not. We lets our house in lodgings to single men; and sometimes I gets them together, with one or two of the neighbours, and makes them all cry.

Old Lady L. Did you every preach in public?

Maw. I got upon Kennington common, the last review day; but the boys threw brickbats at me, and pinned crackers to my tail; and I have been afraid to mount ever since.

Old Lady L. Do you hear this, doctor? throw brickbats at him, and pinned crackers to his pious tail! can these things be stood by ?

Maw. I told them so

-says I, I does nothing clandecently; I stand here contagious to his majesty's guards, and I charge you upon your apparels not

to mislist me.

Old Lady L. And it had no effect?

Maw. No more than if I spoke to so many postesses: but if he advises me to go a preaching, and quit my shop, I will make an excressance further into the country.

Old Lady L. An excursion, you would say.
Maw. I am but a sheep, but my bleatings shall be

heard afar off; and that sheep shall become a shep- | store by me, because we have words now and then; herd: nay, if it be only as it were a shepherd's dog, to bark the stray lambs into the field. Old Lady L. He wants method, doctor.

but as I says, if such was the case, would ever she have cut me down that there time as I was melancholy, and she found me hanging behind the dour; I

Dr.C. Yes, madam; but there is the matter, and don't believe there's a wife in the parish would have

I despise not the ignorant.

done so by her husband.

Dr. C. I believe 'tis near dinner-time; and sir John will require my attendance.

Maw. Oh! I am troublesome-nay, I only come to you, doctor, with a message from Mrs. Grunt. I wish your ladyship heartily and heartily farewell;

Maw. He's a saint--till I went after him, I was little better than the devil; my conscience was tanned with sin, like a piece of neat's leather, and had no more feeling than the sole of my shoe; always roving after fantastical delights: I used to go every Sunday evening, to the Three Hats at Islington! it's a public-doctor, a good day to you. house, mayhap, your ladyship may know it: 1 was a great lover of skittles too, but now I can't bear them.

Old Lady L. What a blessed reformation! Maw. I believe, doctor, you never know'd as how I was instigated one of the stewards of the reforming society. I convicted a man of five oaths, as last Thursday was a seu'night, at the Pewter-platter, in the Borough; and another of three, while he was playing trap-ball in St. George's-fields: I bought this waistcoat out of my share of the money.

Old Lady L. But how do you mind your business? Maw. We have lost almost all our customers; because I keeps extorting them whenever they come into the shop.

Old Lady L. And how do you live?

Old Lady L. Mr. Mawworm, call on me some time this afternoon; I want to have a little private discourse with you; and, pray, my service to your

spouse.

Maw. I will, madam; you are a malefactor to all goodness; I'll wait upon your ladyship; I will indeed: [Going returns] Oh, doctor, that's true; Susy desired me to give her kind love and respects to you. [Exit.

Dr. C. Madam, if you please, I will lead you into the parlour.

Old Lady L. No, doctor, my coach waits at the door. The Hypocrite.

LOW AMBITION AND HONOURABLE FEELING

CONTRASTED.

Sir PERTINAX MACSYCOPHANT and his Son
EGERTON.

Maw. Better than ever we did while we were worldly-minded, my wife and I (for I am married to as likely a woman as you shall see in a thousand) Sir Per. Weel, sir! vary weel! vary weel! are could hardly make things do at all; but since this nat ye a fine spark? are nat ye a fine spark, I say? good man has brought us into the road of the righte--ah! you are a-so you wou'd not come up till ous, we have always plenty of every thing; and my the levee? wife goes as well dressed as a gentlewoman-we Eger. Sir, I beg your pardon; but I was not very have had a child too. well besides, I did not think my presence there was necessary.

Old Lady L. Merciful!

Maw. And between you and me, doctor, I believe Susy's breeding again.

Dr. C. Thus it is, madam; I am constantly told, though I can hardly believe it, a blessing follows wherever I come.

Sir Per. [Snapping him up] Sir, it was necessary; I tauld you it was necessary, and, sir, I must now tell you that the whole tenor of your conduct is most offensive.

Eger. I am sorry you think so, sir; I am sure I Maw. And yet, if you would hear how the neigh-do not intend to offend you. bours reviles my wife; saying as how she sets no

Sir Per. I care not what you intend-Sir, I tell

you, you do offend. What is the meaning of this conduct, sir? neglect the levee !-'sdeath, sir, you -what is your reason, I say, for thus neglecting the levee, and disobeying my commands?

those who do not wish well till Scotland: besides, sir, the other day, in a conversation at dinner at your cousin Campbel M'Kenzie's, before a whole table full of your ain relations, did not you publicly wish a total extinguishment of aw party, and of aw national distinctions whatever, relative to the three kingdoms ?- [With great anger.] And, you blockhead-was that a prudent wish before so many of your ain countrymen ?—or was it a filial language to hold before me!

Eger. [With a stifled filial resentment.] Sir, I am not used to levees: nor do I know how to dispose of myself; or what to say, or do, in such a situation. Sir Per. With a proud angry resentment.] Zounds! sir, do you nat see what others do? gentle and simple, temporal and spiritual, lords, members, judges, generals, and bishops; aw crowding, bustling, Eger. Sir, with your pardon, I cannot think it and pushing foremost intill the middle of the circle, unfilial or imprudent. [With a most patriotic warmth.] and there waiting, watching, and striving to catch a I own I do wish-most ardently wish, for a total exlook or a sunle fra the great mon, which they meet tinction of all party; particularly that those of Engwi' an amicable reesibility of aspect-a modest ca-lish, Irish, and Scotch, might never more be brought dence of body, and a conciliating cooperation of the whole mon; which expresses an officious promptitude for his service, and indicates, that they luock upon themselves as the suppliant appendages of his power, and the enlisted Swiss of his poleetical fortune; this, sir, is what you ought to do, and this, sir, is what I never once omitted for these five and tharty years, let who would be minister.

Eger. [Aside.] Contemptible!

Sir Per. What is that you mutter, sir?

Eger. Only a slight reflection, sir, not relative to you.

Sir Per. Sir, your absenting yourself fra the levee at this juncture is suspeecious; it is looked upon as a kind of disaffection, and aw your countrymen are highly offended at your conduct. For, sir, they do not look upon you as a friend or a well-wisher either to Scotland or Scotchmen.

Eger. [With a quick warmth.] Then, sir, they wrong me, I assure you; but pray, sir, in what particular can I be charged either with coldness or offence to my country?

Sir Per. Why, sir. ever since your mother's uncle, Sir Stanley Egerton, left you this three thousand pounds a year, and that you have, in compliance with his will, taken up the name of Egerton, they think you are grown proud-that you have enstranged yourself fra the Macsycophants-have associated with your mother's family-with the opposeetion, and with

into contest or competition, unless, like loving brothers, in generous emulation for one common cause.

Sir Per. How, sir! do you persist? What! would you banish aw party, and aw distinction between English, Irish, and your ain countrymen? Eger. [With great dignity of spirit. I would, sir.

Sir Per. Then damn you, sir, you are nai true Scot. Ay, sir, you may look as angry as you will, but again I say, you are nai true Scot.

Eger. Your pardon, sir, I think he is the true Scot,
and the true citizen, who wishes equal justice to the
merit and demerit of every subject of Great Britain;
amongst whom I know but of two distinctions.
Sir Per. Wecl, sir, and what are those-what are
those?

Eger. The knave and the honest man.
Sir Per. Pshaw ! rideeculous.

Eger. And he, who makes any other-let him be of the North, or of the South-of the East, or of the West-in place, or out of place, is an enemy to the whole, and to the virtues of humanity.

Sir Per. Ay, sir, this is your brother's impudent doctrine, for the which I have banished him for ever fra my presence, my heart, and my fortune.-Sir, I will have no son of mine, because truly he has been educated in an English seminary, presume, under the mask of candour, to speak against his native land, or against my principles.

THE LAUGHING PHILOSOPHER.

Eger. I never did-nor do I intend it.

ents to abuse the ministry, and settle the affairs of the nation, when they are aw intoxicated; and then, sir, the fellow has aw his wishes and aw his wants,

Sir Per. Sir, I do not believe you--I do not believe you. But, sir, I know your connections and associates, and I know too, you have a saucy lurking pre-in this world and the next. judice against your ain country: you hate it; yes, your mother, her family, and your brother, sir, have aw the same, dark, disaffected rankling; and by that and their politics together, they will be the ruin of you-themselves-and of aw who connect with them.

-However, nai mair of that now; I will talk at large to you about that anon.- -In the mean while, sir, notwithstanding your contempt of my advice, and your disobedience till my commands, will convince you of my paternal attention till your welfare, by my management of this voluptuary-this Lord Lumbercourt, whose daughter you are to marry. You ken, sir, that the fellow has been my patron above these five and thirty years.

Eger. True, sir.

Sir Per. Vary weel.--And now, sir, you see by his prodigality, he is become my dependent; and accordingly I have made my bargain with him: the devil a baubee he has in the world but what comes through these clutches; for his whole estate, which has three implecit boroughs upon it-mark-is now in my custody at nurse; the which estate, on my paying off his debts, and allowing him a life rent of five thousand pounds per annum is to be made over till me for my life, and, at my death is to descend till ye and your issue. The peerage of Lumbercourt, you ken, will follow of course-So, sir, you see, there are three impleecit boroughs, the whole patrimony of Lumbercourt, and a peerage at one slap. Why, it is a stroke-a hit-a hit-Zounds! sir, a mon may live a century and not make sic an hit again.

Eger. It is a very advantageous bargain indeed, sir-but what will my lord's family say to it?

Sir Per. Why, mon, he cares not if his family were aw at the devil, so his luxury is but gratified :-only let him have his race-horse to feed his vanity; his harridan to drink drams with him, scrat his face, and burn his periwig, when she is in her maudlin hysterics-and three or four discontented patriotic depend

Enter TOMLINS.

Tom. Lady Rodolpha is come, sir.
Sir Per. And ford?
my

Tom. Not yet, sir; he is about a mile behind, the servants say.

Sir Per. Let me know the instant he arrives.
Tom. I shall, sir.

[Exit.

Sir Per. Step you out, Charles, and receive Lady Rodolpha; and, I desire you will treat her with as much respect and gallantry as possible; for my lord has hinted that you have been very remiss as a lover. -So go, go and receive her.

Eger. 1 shall, sir.

Sir Per. Vary weel, vary weel;-a guid lad: go, go and receive her as a lover should. [Exit Egerton.] Hah' I must keep a devilish tight hand upon this fellow, I see, or he will be touched with the patriotic phrenzy of the times, and run counter till aw my designs. I find he has a strong inclination to have a judgment of his ain, independent of mine, in aw political matters; but as soon as I have finally settled the marriage writings with my lord, I will have a thorough expostulation with my gentleman, I am resolved-and fix him unalterably in his political conduct.-Ah! I am frightened out of my wits, lest his mother's family should seduce him to desert to their party, which would totally ruin my whole scheme, and break my heart.-A fine time of day for a blockhead to turn patriot-when the character is exploded, marked, proscribed? Why, the common people, the vary vulgar, have found out the jest, and laugh at a patriot now-a-days, just as they do at a conjurer, a magician, or any other impostor in society.

RIGHT HONOURABLE FOLLY AND BASE FLATTERY.
Sir PERTINAX and Lord LUMBERCOURT.
Lord Lum. Sir Pertinax, I kiss your hand.

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