So in they came, and for his picking,
Behold the table covers spread,

Instead of Goody's cheese and bread,
With tarts, and fish, and flesh, and chicken.
And to appear in greater state,

The knives and forks with silver handles,
The candlesticks of bright (French) plate
To hold her best mould (tallow) candles,
Were all brought forth to be display'd,
In female housewifry parade.

And more the Pedlar to regale,

And make the wond'rous man her friend,
Decanters foam'd of mantling ale,

And port and claret without end;

They hobb'd and nobb'd, and smil'd and laugh'd, Touch'd glasses, nam'd their toasts, and quaff'd; Talk'd over every friend and foe,

Till eating, drinking, talking past,

The kind house-clock struck twelve at last.

When wishing Madam bon repos,

The Pedlar pleaded weary head,

Made his low bow, and went to bed.

Wishing him then at perfect ease, A good soft bed, a good sound sleep, Now, gentle reader, if you please, We'll at the Lady take a peep.

She could not rest, but turn'd and toss'd,
While Fancy whisper'd in her brain,

That what her indiscretion lost,
Her art and cunning might regain.
Such Linen to so poor a dame!

For such coarse fare! perplex'd her head;
Why might not she expect the same,
So courteous, civil, and well-bred ?

And now she reckon'd up her store
Of Cambricks, Hollands, Muslins, Lawns,
Free gifts, and Purchases, and Pawns,
Resolv'd to multiply them more,

Till she had got a Stock of Linen,
Fit for a Dowager to sin in.

The morning came, when up she got,

Most ceremoniously inclin'd

To wind up her sagacious plot,

With all that civil stuff we find

'Mongst those who talk a wond'rous deal Of what they neither mean nor feel.

How shall I, Ma'm, reply'd the Guest, Make you a suitable return,

For

your attention and concern, And such civilities exprest

To one, who must be still in debt

For all the kindness he has met?
For this your entertainment's sake,
If ought of good my wish can do,
May what you first shall undertake,
Last without ceasing all day through.

Madam, who kindly understood
His wish effectually good,

Strait dropp'd a curtsie wond'rous low,
For much she wanted him to go,
That she might look up all her store,
And turn it into thousands more.

Now all the maids were sent to look
In every cranny, hole, and nook,
For every rag which they could find
Of any size, or any kind.

Draw'rs, Boxes, Closets, Chests, and Cases

Were all unlock'd at once to get

Her Point, her Gauze, her Prussia-net,

With fifty names of fifty kinds,

Which suit variety of minds.

How shall I now my tale pursue, So passing strange, so passing true?

When every bit from every hoard,
Was brought and laid upon the board,
Lest some more urgent obligation
Might interrupt her pleasing toil,
And marring half her application,
The promis'd hopes of profit spoil,
Before she folds a single rag,

Or takes a cap from board or bag,
That nothing might her work prevent,
(For she was now resolv'd to labour,
With earnest hope and full intent
To get the better of her neighbour)
Into the garden she would go
To do that necessary thing,
Which must by all be done, you know,
By rich and poor, and high and low,
By Male and Female, Queen and King.
She little dream'd a common action,
Practis'd as duly as her pray'rs,
Should prove so tedious a transaction,
Or cost her such a sea of cares.

In short the streams so plenteous flow'd, That in the dry and dusty weather, She might have water'd all the road For ten or twenty miles together.

H

What could she do? as it began,
Th' involuntary torrent ran.
Instead of folding Cap or Mob,
So dreadful was this distillation,
That from a simple watering job,
She fear'd a general Inundation.
While for her Indiscretion's crime,
And coveting too great a store,
She made a River at a time,

Which sure was never done before.