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in that surge, like a horse-shoe; think of that;— hissing hot,—think of that, master Brook.
Ford. In good sadness, sir, I am sorry that for my sake you have suffered all this. My suit then is desperate; you'll undertake her no more.
Fal. Master Brook, I will be thrown into Ætna, as I have been into Thames, ere I will leave her thus. Her husband is this morning gone a birding : I have received from her another embassy of meeting; 'twixt eight and nine is the hour, master Brook.
Ford. 'Tis past eight already, sir.
Fal. Is it? I will then address 6 me to my appointment. Come to me at your convenient leisure, and you shall know how I speed; and the conclusion shall be crowned with your enjoying her: Adieu. You shall have her, master Brook; master Brook, you shall cuckold Ford.
[Exit. Ford. Hum ! ha! is this a vision? is this a dream? do I sleep? Master Ford, awake; awake, master Ford; there's a hole made in your best coat, master Ford. This 'tis to be married ! this 'tis to have linen, and buck-baskets !-Well, I will proclaim myself what I am: I will now take the lecher; he is at my house: he cannot ’scape me; 'tis impossible he should; he cannot creep into a halfpenny purse, nor into a pepper-box: but, lest the devil that guides him should aid him, I will search impossible places. Though what I am I cannot avoid, yet to be what I would not, shall not make me tame: if I have horns to make one mad, let the proverb go with me, I'll be horn mad.
[Exit. 6 Make myself ready.
WILLIAM. Mrs. Page. Is he at master Ford's already, think'st thou?
Quick. Sure, he is by this; or will be presently: but truly, he is very courageous? mad, about his throwing into the water. Mistress Ford desires you to come suddenly.
Mrs. Page. I'll be with her by and by; I'll but bring my young man here to school: Look, where his master comes; 'tis a playing-day, I see.
Enter Sir Hugh EvANS. How now, Sir Hugh? no school to-day?
Eva. No; master Slender is let the boys leave to play.
Quick. Blessing of his heart!
Mrs. Page. Sir Hugh, my husband says, my son profits nothing in the world at his book; I pray you, ask him some questions in his accidence.
Eva. Come hither, William; hold up your head; come.
Mrs. Page. Come on, sirrah; hold up your head; answer your master, be not afraid.
Eva. William, how many numbers is in nouns ? Will. Two.
Quick. Truly, I thought there had been one number more; because they say, od’s nouns. Eva. Peace your tattlings. What is fair, William?
257 Will. Pulcher.
Quick. Poulcats! there are fairer things than poulcats, sure.
Eva. You are a very simplicity 'oman; I pray you peace. What is lapis, William?
Will. A stone.
Eva. No, it is lapis; I pray you remember in your prain.
Eva. That is good, William. What is he, William, that does lend articles ?
Will. Articles are borrowed of the pronoun; and be thus declined, Singulariter, nominativo, hic, hæc, hoc.
Eva. Nominativo, hig, hag, hog; pray you, mark: genitivo, hujus: Well, what is your accusative case?
Will. Accusativo, hinc.
Eva. I pray you, have your remembrance, child ; Accusativo, hing, hang, hog.
Quick. Hang hog is Latin for bacon, I warrant you.
Eva. Leave your prabbles, 'oman. What is the focative case, William ?
Will. 0vocativo, 0. Eva. Remember, William; focative is caret. Quick. And that's a good root. Eva. 'Oman, forbear. Mrs. Page. Peace. Eva. What is your genitive case plural, William? Will. Genitive case? Eva, Ay. Will. Genitivo,-horum, harum, horum. Quick. ’Vengeance of Jenny's case! fie on her! -never name her, child, if she be a whore.
Eva. For shame, 'oman.
Quick. You do ill to teach the child such words: he teaches him to hick and to hack, which they'll do fast enough of themselves; and to call horum :—fie upon you!
Eva. 'Oman, art thou lunatics? hast thou no understandings for thy cases, and the numbers of the genders? Thou art as foolish christian creatures as I would desires. Mrs. Page. Pr’ythee hold thy peace.
Eva. Shew me now, William, some declensions of your pronouns.
Will. Forsooth, I have forgot.
Eva. It is ki, ke, cod; if you forget your kies, your kæs, and your cods, you must be preeches. Go your ways, and play, go.
Mrs. Page. He is a better scholar than I thought he was.
Eva. He is a good sprag3 memory. Farewell, mistress Page.
Mrs. Page. Adieu, good Sir Hugh. [Exit Sır. Hugh.] Get you home, boy.—Come, we stay too
SCENE II. A Room in Ford's House.
Enter FALSTAFF and Mrs. FORD.. Fal. Mistress Ford, your sorrow hath eaten up my sufferance: I see, you are obsequious 1 in your love, and I profess your requital to a hair's breadth; not only, mistress Ford, in the simple office of love,
2 Breeched, i. e. flogged.
1 So, in Hamlet: "To do obsequious sorrow. The epithet obsequious refers, in both instances, to the seriousness with which obsequies are performed.
but in all the accoutrement, complement, and ceremony of it. But are you sure of your husband now?
Mrs. Ford. He's a birding, sweet Sir John.
Mrs. Page. [within.] What hoa, gossip Ford! what hoa! Mrs. Ford. Step into the chamber, Sir John.
[Exit FALSTAFF. Enter Mrs. Page. Mrs. Page. How now, sweetheart? who's at home beside yourself?
Mrs. Ford. Why, none but mine own people.
Mrs. Page. Truly, I am so glad you have nobody here.
Mrs. Ford. Why?
Mrs. Page. Why, woman, your husband is in his old lunes? again: he so takes on yonder with my husband; so rails against all married mankind; so curses all Eve's daughters, of what complexion soever; and so buffets himself on the forehead, crying, Peer out, peer out 3! that any madness, I ever yet beheld, seemed but tameness, civility, and patience, to this his distemper he is in now: I am glad the fat knight is not here.
Mrs. Ford. Why, does he talk of him?
Mrs. Page. Of none but him; and swears, he was carried out, the last time he searched for him, in a basket: protests to my husband he is now here; and hath drawn him and the rest of their company
scurses ali se rails age iso take your husband
i.e. lanacy, frenzy. 3 Shakspeare refers to a sport of children, who thus call on a snail to push forth his horns :
“ Peer out, peer out, peer out of your hole,