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B.'s gardens, and what fine walks they contain; yon know the handsome flight of an hundred steps, which lead from the terrace above to the lawn below. You have been in the practice of visiting this amiable family twice a week after dinner ; and as it is a maxim of your own, that " a man may take as much exercise in walking a mile up and down stairs, as in ten on level ground," what an opportunity was here for you to have had exercise in both these ways! Did you embrace it—and how often?
Franklin. I cannot immediately answer that question.
Gout. I will do it for you: not once.
Gout. Even so. During the summer you went there at six o'clock. You found the charming lady, with her lovely children and friends, eager to walk with you, and entertain you with their agreeable conversation: and what has been your choice? Why to sit on the terrace, satisfying yourself with the fine prospect, and passing your eye over the beanties of the garden below, without taking one step to descend and walk about in them. On the contrary, you call for tea, and the chess-board; and lo! you are occupied in your seat till nine o'clock, and that beside two hours' play after dinner; and then, instead of walking home, which would have bestirred you a little, you step into your carriage. How absurd to suppose, that all this carelessness can be reconcileable with health, without my interposition!
Franklin. I am convinced now of the justness of poor Richard's remark, that " Our debts and our sins are always greater than we think for."
Gout. So it is! you philosophers are sages in your maxims, and fools in your conduct.
Franklin But do you charge among my crimes, that I return in a carriage from Mr. B.'s?
Gout. Certainly: for having been seated all the while, you cannot object the fatigue of the day, and cannot want therefore the relief of a carriage.
Franklin. What then would you have me do with my carriage?
Gout. Burn it if you choose; you would at least get heat out of it once in this way; or if you dislike that proposal, here's another for you: observe the poor peasants who work in the vineyards and grounds about the villages of Passy, Autenil, Chaillois, &c.; you may find every day, among these deserving creatures, four or five old men and women, bent, and perhaps crippled, by weight of years, and too long and too great labour. After a most fatiguing day, these people have to trndge a mile or two to their smoky huts. Order your coachman to set them down. That is an act that will be good for your soul; and at the same time, after your visit to the B * * s, if you return on foot, that will be good for your body. Franklin. Ah! how tiresome you are! Gout. Well then, to my office; it should not be forgotten that I am your physician. There. Franklin. Oh-h-h! what a devil of a physician! Gout. How ungrateful are you to say so! Is it not I, who, in the character of your physician, have saved you from the palsy, dropsy, and apoplexy? one or other of which would have done for you long ago, but for me. Franklin. I submit—and thank you for the past; but entreat the discontinuance of your visits for the future: for in my mind one had better die than be cured so dolefully. Permit me just to hint, that I have also not been unfriendly to you. 1 never feed physician, or quack of any kind, to enter the list against you; if then you do not leave me to my repose, it may be said you are ungrateful too.
Gout. I can scarcely acknowledge that as any objection. As to quacks, I despise them: they may kill you, indeed, but cannot injure me. And as to regular physicians, they are at last convinced, that the gout, in such a subject as you are, is no disease, but a remedy; and wherefore cure a remedy? But to our business—there—
Franklin. Oh t Oh! For Heaven's sake leave me; and I promise faithfully never more to play at chess, but to take exercise daily, and live temperately.
Gout. I know you too well. You promise fair; but, after a few months of good health, you will return to your old habits; your fme promises will be forgotten like the forms of the last year's clonds. Let us then finish the account, and I will go. But I leave you with an assurance of visiting you again at a proper time and place; for my object is your good, and you are sensible now that I am your real friend.
A PARABLE AGAINST PERSECUTION, IN IMITATION OF SCRIPTURE LANGUAGE.
1. And it came to pass, after these things, that Abraham sat in the door of his tent, about the going down of the sun.
2. And behold a man bent with age, coming from the way of the wilderness leaning on a staff.
3. And Abraham arose, and met him, and said unto him, Turn in, I pray thee, and wash thy feet, and tarry all night; and thou shalt arise early in the morning, and go on thy way.
4. And the man said, Nay; for I will abide under this tree.
5. But Abraham pressed him greatly: so he turned and they went into the tent: and Abraham baked unleavcn bread, and they did eat.
6. And when Abraham saw that the man blessed not God, he said unto him, Wherefore dost thou not worship the most high God, creator of heaven and earth?
7. And the man answered and said, I do not worship thy God, neither do I call upon his name, for I have made to myself a god, which abideth always in my house, and provideth me with all things.
8. And Abraham's zeal was kindled against the man, and he arose, and fell upon him, and drove him forth with blows into the wilderness.
9. And God called unto Abraham, saying, Abraham, where is the stranger?
10. And Abraham answered and said, Lord, he would not worship thee, neither would he call upon thy name, therefore have I driven him out from before my face into the wilderness.
11. And God said, Have I borne with him these hundred and ninety and eight years, and nourished him, and clothed him, notwithstanding his rebellion against me, and couldst not thou, who art thyself a sinner, bear with him one night?
12. And Abraham said, Let not the anger of my Lord wax hot against his servant; lo, I have sinned; forgive me, I pray thee.
13. And Abraham arose, and went forth into the wilderness, and diligently sought for the man, and found him, and returned with him to the tent, and when he had entreated him kindly, he sent him away on the morrow with gifts.
14. And God spake again unto Abraham, saying, For this thy sin shall thy seed be afflicted four hundred years in a strange land.
15. But for thy repentance will I deliver them, and they shall come forth with power, and with gladness of heart, and with much substance.
ON THE DEATH OF RELATIVES.
Philadelphia, Feb. !2,1756. I Condole with you. We have lost a most dear and valuable relation.* But it is the will of God and nature that these mortal bodies be laid aside when the soul is to enter into real life. This is rather an embryo state, a preparation for living. A man is not completely born until he be dead. Why then should we grieve that a new child is born among the immortals, a new member added to their happy society? We are spirits. That bodies should be lent us, while they can afford us pleasure, assist us in acquiring knowledge, or doing good to our fellowcreatures, is a kind and benevolent act of God. When they become unfit for these purposes, and afford us pain instead of pleasure, instead of an aid become an encumbrance, and answer none of the,
.. • Mr. John Franklin, the writer's brother.