fore I knew wnat interpretation the world generally put upon them. "Animula vagula, blandula, Nec (ut soles) dabis jocos!" "Alas, my soul! thou pleasing companion of this body, thou fleeting thing that art now deserting it, whither art thou flying? to what unknown region? Thou art all trembling, fearful, and pensive. Now what is become of thy former wit and hu.nour? Thou shalt jest and be gay no more. 'I confess I cannot apprehend where lies the trifling in all this; it is the most natural and obvious reflection imaginable to a dying man: and, if we consider the emperor was a heathen, that doubt concerning the future state of his soul will seem so far from being the effect of want of thought, that it was scarce reasonable he should think otherwise: not to mention that there is a plain confession included of his belief in its immortality. The diminutive epithets of vagula, blandula, and the rest, appear not to me as expressions of levity, but rather of endearment and concern; such as we find in Catullus, and the authors of Hendecasyllabi after him, where they are used to express the utmost love and tenderness for their mistresses. If you think me right in my notion of the last words of Adrian, be pleased to insert this in the Spectator; if not, suppress it. 'I am, &c.' • To the supposed Author of the Spectator. 'In courts licentious, and a shameless stage, "Thy works in Chloe's toilet gain a part, * Mr. Tickell here alludes to Steel's papers against the sharpers, &c. in the Tatler, and particularly to a letter in Tat. No. 73, signed Will Trusty, and written by Mr. John Hughes. ↑ Viscount Bolingbroke. Such readers scorn'd, thou wing'st thy daring flight 'Permit these lines by thee to live-nor blame 'So some weak shoot, which else would poorly rise, • To the Spectator General. 'That upon reading the deputation given to the said Mr. John Sly, all persons passing by his observatory behaved themselves with the same decorum as if your honour yourself had been present. "That your said officer is preparing, according to your honour's secret instructions, hats for the several kinds of heads that make figures in the realms of Great Britain, with cocks significant of their powers and faculties. That your said officer has taken due notice of your instructions and admonitions concerning the internals of the head from the outward form of the same. His hats for men of the faculties of law and physic do but just turn up, to give a little life to their sagacity; his military hats glare full in the face; and he has prepared a familiar easy cock for all good companions between the above-mentioned extremes. For this end he has consulted the most learned of his acquaintance for the true form and dimensions of the lepidum caput, and made a hat fit for it. Your said officer does farther represent, that the young divines about town are many of them got into the cock military and desires your instructions therein. "That the town has been for several days very well behaved, and farther your said officer saith not.' T. وو various characters_of fine women prefer- custom of parents in forcing their children | beauty, yet there is none among all your to marry contrary to their inclinations. My own case, without farther preface, I will lay before you, and leave you to judge of it. My father and mother, both being in declining years, would fain see me, their eldest son, as they call it, settled. I am as much for that as they can be; but I must be settled, it seems, not according to my own, but their liking. Upon this account I am teased every day, because I have not 'MR. SPECTATOR,-When you spent so yet fallen into love, in spite of nature, with much time as you did lately in censuring one of a neighbouring gentleman's daugh- the ambitious young gentlemen who ride ters; for out of their abundant generosity, in triumph through town and country on they give me the choice of four. "Jack, coach-boxes, I wish you had employed begins my father. "Mrs. Catharine is a those moments in consideration of what fine woman."-"Yes, sir, but she is rather passes sometimes within-side of those vehitoo old.". "She will make the more dis- cles. I am sure I suffered sufficiently by creet manager, boy." Then my mother the insolence and ill-breeding of some perplays her part. "Is not Mrs. Betty exceed- sons who travelled lately with me in the ing fair?" "Yes, madam, but she is of no stage-coach out of Essex to London. I am conversation; she has no fire, no agreeable sure, when you have heard what I have to vivacity; she neither speaks nor looks with say, you will think there are persons under spirit." "True, son, but for those very the character of gentlemen, that are fit to reasons she will be an easy, soft, obliging, be no where else but on the coach-box. tractable creature. —" After all,” cries an Sir, I am a young woman of a sober and old aunt, (who belongs to the class of those religious education, and have preserved who read plays with spectacles on,)" what that character; but on Monday was fortthink you, nephew, of proper Mrs. Doro- night, it was my misfortune to come to thy?""What do I think? why, I think London. I was no sooner clapped into the she cannot be above six foot two inches coach, but, to my great surprise, two perhigh. Well, well, you may banter as sons in the habit of gentlemen attacked me long as you please, but height of stature with such indecent discourse as I cannot is commanding and majestic."-"Come, repeat to you, so you may conclude not fit come," says a cousin of mine in the family, for me to hear. I had no relief but the "I will fit him; Fidelia is yet behind- hopes of a speedy end of my short journey. pretty Miss Fiddy must please you.". Sir, form to yourself what a persecution "Oh! your very humble servant, dear coz, this must needs be to a virtuous and chaste she is as much too young as her eldest sis- mind; and, in order to your proper handter is too old.”. "Is it so, indeed," quoth ling such a subject, fancy your wife or she, "good Mr. Pert? You that are but daughter, if you had any, in such circumturned of twenty-two, and Miss Fiddy in stances, and what treatment you would half a year's time will be in her teens, then think due to such dragoons. One of and she is capable of learning any thing. them was called a captain, and entertained Then she will be so observant; she will us with nothing but filthy stupid questions, cry perhaps now and then, but never be or lewd songs, all the way. Ready to burst angry. Thus they will think for me in with shame and indignation, I repined that this matter, wherein I am more particu- nature had not allowed us as easily to shut. larly concerned than any body else. If I our ears as our eyes. But was not this a name any woman in the world, one of these kind of rape? Why should there be acdaughters has certainly the same qualities. cessaries in ravishment any more than You see by these few hints, Mr. Spectator, murder? Why should not every contriwhat a comfortable life I lead. To be still butor to the abuse of chastity suffer death? more open and free with you, I have been I am sure these shameless hell-hounds depassionately fond of a young lady (whom served it highly. Can you exert yourself give me leave to call Miranda) now for better than on such an occasion? If you do these three years. I have often urged the not do it effectually, I will read no more of matter home to my parents with all the your papers. Has every impertinent felsubmission of a son, but the impatience of low a privilege to torment me, who pay a lover. Pray, sir, think of three years: my coach-hire as well as he? Sir, pray what inexpressible scenes of inquietude, consider us in this respect as the weakest what variety of misery must I have gone sex, who have nothing to defend ourselves; through in three whole years! Miranda's and I think it is as gentleman-like to chalfortune is equal to those I have mentioned; lenge a woman to fight as to talk obscenely but her relations are not intimates with in her company, especially when she has mine! Ah! there's the rub! Miranda's not power to stir. Pray let me tell you a person, wit, and humour, are what the story which you can make fit for public nicest fancy could imagine; and, though view. I knew a gentleman who, having a we know you to be so elegant a judge of very good opinion of the gentlemen of the VOL. II. 39 -We seldom find Much sense with an exaltel fortune joined. Stepney. . army, invited ten or twelve of them to supp with him; and at the same time invited two or three friends who were very severe MR. SPECTATOR,-I am a young woman against the manners and mcrals of gentlemen of that profession. It happened one of nineteen, the only daughter of very of them brought two captains of his regi- wealthy parents, and have my whole life ment newly come into the army, who at been used with a tenderness which did me the first onset engaged the company with no great service in my education. I have very lewd healths and suitable discourse. perhaps an uncommon desire for knowledge You may easily imagine the confusion of of what is suitable to my sex and quality; the entertainer, who finding some of his but, as far as I can remember, the whole friends very uneasy, desired to tell them dispute about me has been, whether such the story of a great man, one Mr. Locke, a thing was proper for the child to do, or (whom I find you frequently mention) that not? or whether such or such a food was being invited to dine with the then lords the more wholesome for the young lady to Halifax, Anglesey, and Shaftesbury, im- eat? This was ill for my shape, that for my mediately after dinner, instead of conver- complexion, and the other for my eyes. I sation, the cards were called for, where am not extravagant when I tell you, I do the bad or good success produced the usual not know that I have trod upon the very passions of gaming. Mr. Locke, retiring earth ever since I was ten years old. to a window, and writing, my lord Angle-coach or chair I am obliged to for all my sey desired to know what he was writing: motions from one place to another ever "Why, my lords," answered he, "I could not sleep last night for the pleasure and improvement I expected from the conversation of the greatest men of the age. This so sensibly stung them, that they gladly compounded to throw their cards in the fire, if he would his paper, and so a conversation ensued fit for such persons. This story pressed so hard upon the young captains, together with the concurrence of their superior officers, that the young fellows left the company in confusion. Sir, I know you hate long things; but if you like it you may contract it, or how you will; but I think it has a moral in it. A since I can remember. All who had to do to instruct me, have ever been bringing stories of the notable things I have said, and the womanly manner of my behaving myself upon such and such an occasion. This has been my state until I came towards years of womanhood: and ever since grew towards the age of fifteen I have been abused after another manner. Now, forsooth, I am so killing, no one can safely speak to me. Our house is frequented by men of sense, and I love to ask questions when I fall into such conversation; but I am cut short with something or other about my bright eyes. There is, sir, a language 'But, sir, I am told you are a famous particular for talking to women in; and mechanic as well as a looker-on, and there- none but those of the very first good-breedfore humbly propose you would inventing (who are very few, and who seldom some padlock, with full power under your hand and seal, for all modest persons, either men or women, to clap upon the mouths of all such impertinent impudent fellows: and I wish you would publish a proclamation, that no modest person who has value for her countenance, and consequently would not be put out of it, presume to travel after such a day without one of them in their pockets. I fancy a smart Spectator upon this subject would serve for such a padlock; and that public notice may be given in your paper where they may be had, with directions, price two pence; and that part of the directions may be, when any person presumes to be guilty of the above-mentioned crime, the party aggrieved may produce it to his face, with a request to read it to the company. He must be very much hardened that could outface that rebuke; and his farther punishment I leave you to prescribe. Your humble servant, T. 'PENANCE CRUEL.” come into my way) can speak to us without I have No. 534.] Wednesday, November 12, 1712. she would tell me I was the most like one Sisly Dobson in their town, who made the miller make away with himself, and walk afterwards in the corn-field where they used to meet. With all this, this cunning huzzy can lay letters in my way, and put a billet in my gloves, and then stand in it she knows nothing of it. I do not know, from my birth to this day, that I have been ever treated by any one as I ought; and if it were not for a few books, which I delight in, I should be at this hour a novice to all common sense. Would it not be worth your while to lay down rules for behaviour in this case, and tell people, that we fair ones expect honest plain answers as well as other people? Why must I, good sir, because I have a good air, a fine complexion, and am in the bloom of my years, be misled in all my actions; and have the notions of good and ill confounded in my mind, for no other offence, but because I have the advantages of beauty and fortune? Indeed, sir, what with the silly homage which is paid to us by the sort of people I have above spoken of, and the utter negligence which others have for us, the conversation of us young women of condition is no other than what must expose us to ignorance and vanity, if not vice. All this is humbly submitted to your spectatorial wisdom, by sir, your humble servant, 'SHARLOT WEALTHY.' "Will's Coffee-house. MR. SPECTATOR,-Pray, sir, it will serve to fill up a paper if you put in this; which is only to ask, whether that copy of verses which is a paraphrase of Isaiah, in one of your speculations, is not written by Mr. Pope? Then you get on another line, by putting in, with proper distances, as at the end of a letter, I am, sir, your humble the end of a letter, I am, sir, your humble 'MR. SPECTATOR,-I am in the condition of the idol you was once pleased to mention, and bar keeper of a coffee-house. I believe it is needless to tell you the oppor tunities I must give, and the importunities I suffer. But there is one gentleman who besieges me as close as the French did Bouchain. His gravity makes him work cautious, and his regular approaches denote a good engineer. You need not doubt of his oratory, as he is a lawyer; and especially since he has had so little use of it at Westminster, he may spare the more for me. • What then can weak women do? I am willing to surrender, but he would have it at discretion, and I with discretion. In the mean time, whilst we parley, our several interests are neglected. As his siege grows stronger, my tea grows weaker; and while he pleads at my bar, none come to him for counsel but in forma pauperis. Dear Mr. Spectator, advise him not to insist upon hard articles, nor by his irregular desires contradict the well meaning lines of his countenance. If we were agreed, we might settle to something, as soon as we could determine where we should get most by the law-at the coffee-house, or at Westminster. Your humble servant, 'LUCINDA PARLEY. A Minute from Mr. John Sly. The world is pretty regular for about forty rod east and ten west of the observatory of the said Mr. Sly; but he is credibly informed, that when they are got beyond the pass into the Strand, or those who move city-ward are got within Temple-bar, they humbly proposed, that moving centries are just as they were before. It is therefore may be appointed all the busy hours of the day between the Exchange and Westmin'MR. DAPPERWIT,-I am glad to get ster, and report what passes to your hoanother line forward, by saying that excel-nour, or your subordinate officers, from lent piece is Mr. Pope's; and so, with time to time.' proper distances, I am, your humble servant, THE SPECTATOR.' servant, ABRAHAM DAPPERWIT.' Ordered, That Mr. Śly name the said officers, proand morals. vided he will answer for their principles T. 'MR. SPECTATOR,-I was a wealthy grocer in the city, and as fortunate as diligent; but I was a single man, and you know there are women. Öne in particular came to my shop, who I wished might, but was No. 535.] Thursday, November 13, 1712. afraid never would, make a grocer's wife. I thought, however, to take an effectual way of courting, and sold her at less price than I bought, that I might buy at less price than I sold. She, you may be sure, often came and helped me to many customers at the same rate, fancying I was obliged to her. You must needs think this was a good living trade, and my riches must be vastly improved. In fine, I was nigh being declared bankrupt, when I declared myself her lover, and she, herself married. I was just in a condition to support myself, and am now in hopes of growing rich by losing my customers. Yours, 'JEREMY COMFIT.' The natural consequences of such reflections are these, that we should take care not to let our hopes run out into too great a length; that we should sufficiently weigh the objects of our hope, whether they be such as we may reasonably expect from them what we propose in their fruition, and whether they are such as we are pretty sure of attaining, in case our life extend itself so far. If we hope for things which are at too great a distance from us, it is possible that we may be intercepted by death in our progress towards them. If we hope for things which we have not thoroughly considered the value of, our disappointment will be greater than our pleasure in the fruition of them. If we hope for what we are not likely to possess, we act and think in vain, and make life a greater dream and shadow than it really is. kind of hope unreasonable and absurd. The | fellow, that would never set his hand to grave lies unseen between us and the ob- any business during his father's life. When ject which we reach after. Where one his father died, he left him to the value of man lives to enjoy the good he has in view, a hundred drachmas in Persian money. ten thousand are cut off in the pursuit of it. Alnaschar, in order to make the best of it, It happens likewise unluckily, that one laid it out in glasses, bottles, and the finest hope no sooner dies in us but another rises earthenware. These he piled up in a large up in its stead. We are apt to fancy that open basket, and, having made choice of a we shall be happy and satisfied if we pos- very little shop, placed the basket at his sess ourselves of such and such particular feet: and leaned his back upon the wall, in enjoyments; but either by reason of their expectation of customers. As he sat in this emptiness, or the natural inquietude of the posture, with his eyes upon the basket, he mind, we have no sooner gained one point, fell into a most amusing train of thought, but we extend our hopes to another. We and was overheard by one of his neighstill find new inviting scenes and landscapes bours, as he talked to himself in the follying behind those which at a distance ter- lowing manner: "This basket,' says he, minated our view. 'cost me at the wholesale merchant's a hundred drachmas, which is all I have in the world. I shall quickly make two hundred of it, by selling it in retail. These two hundred drachmas will in a very little while rise to four hundred, which of course_will amount in time to four thousand. Four thousand drachmas cannot fail of making eight thousand. As soon as by these means I am master of ten thousand, I will lay aside my trade of a glassman, and turn jeweller. I shall then deal in diamonds, pearls, and all sorts of rich stones. When I have got together as much wealth as I well can desire, I will make a purchase of the finest house I can find, with lands, slaves, eunuchs, and horses. I shall then begin to enjoy myself and make a noise in the world. I will not however stop there, but still continue my traffic, until I have got together a hundred thousand drachmas. When I have thus made myself master of a hundrea thousand drachmas I shall naturally set myself on the foot of a prince, and will demand the grand vizier's daughter in marriage, after having represented to that minister the information which I have received of the beauty, wit, discretion, and other high qualities which his daughter possesses. I will let him know at the same time, that it is my intention to make him a present of a thousand pieces of gold on our marriage night. As soon as I have married the grand vizier's daughter, I will buy her ten black eunuchs, the youngest and the best that can be got for money. I must afterwards make my father-in-law a visit, with a great train and equipage. And when I am placed at his right hand, which he will do of course, if it be only to honour his daughter, I will give him the thousand pieces of gold which I promised him; and afterwards to his great surprise, will present him with another purse of the same value, with some short speech: as, "Sir, you see I am a man of my word: I always give more than I promise.' Many of the miseries and misfortunes of life proceed from our want of consideration, in one or all of these particulars. They are the rocks on which the sanguine tribe of lovers daily split, and on which the bankrupt, the politician, the alchymist, and projector, are cast away in every age. Men of warm imaginations and towering thoughts are apt to overlook the goods of fortune which are near them, for something that glitters in the sight at a distance; to neglect solid and substantial happiness for what is showy and superficial; and to contemn that good which lies within their reach, for that which they are not capable of attaining. Hope calculates its schemes for a long and durable life; presses forward to imaginary points of bliss; grasps at impossibilities; and consequently very often ensnares men into beggary, ruin, and dishonour. What I have here said may serve as a moral to an Arabian fable, which I find translated into French by Monsieur Galland. The fable has in it such a wild but natural simplicity, that I question not but my reader will be as much pleased with it as I have been, and that he will consider himself, if he reflects on the several amusements of hope which have sometimes passed in his mind, as a near relation to the Persian glassman. Alnaschar, says the fable, was a very idle 'When I have brought the princess to my house, I shall take particular care to breed her in a due respect for me before 1 give the reins to love and dalliance. To this end I shall confine her to her own apartment, make her a short visit, and talk |