your bare conscience, I am your most obedient and halfstarv'd friend and servant. [Going. Gayl. Hold, Sharp, you won't leave me. Sharp. I must eat, Sir; by my honour and appetite I must! Gayl. Well then, I am resolv'd to favour the cheat; and as I shall quite change my former course of life, happy may be the consequences: at least of this I am sure Sharp. That you can't be worse than you are at present. Gayl. (A knocking without.)Who's there? Sharp. Some of your former good friends, who favoured you with money at fifty per cent, and helped you to spend it; and are now become daily memento's to you of the folly of trusting rogues, following whores, and laughing at my advice. Gayl. Cease your impertinence! to the door! if they are duns, tell 'em my marriage is now certainly fix'd, and persuade em still to forbear a few days longer, and keep my circumstances a secret for their sakes as well as ́ my own. Sharp. O never fear it, Sir; they still have so much friendship for you, not to desire your ruin to their own disadvantage. - Gayl. And do you hear, Sharp, if it shou'd be any body from Melissa, say I am not at home, lest the bad appearance we make here should make 'em suspect something to our disadvantage. Sharp. I'll obey you, Sir;- but I am afraid they will easily discover the consumptive situation of our affairs by my chop-fallen countenance. [Exit Sharp. Gayl. These very rascals, who are continually dunning. and persecuting me, were the very persons who led me to my ruin, partook of my prosperity, and profess'd the great- est friendship. Sharp. (without.) Upon my word, Mrs Kitty, my ma ster's not at home. Kit. (without.) Lockee, Sharp, I must and will see him! Gayl. Ha, what do I hear? Melissa's maid! what has brought her here? my poverty has made her my enemytoo. She is certainly come with no good intent No friendship there, without fees- She's coming up stairs. What must I do ?-I'll get into this closet and listen. B5 [Exit Gayless. Enter Enter SHARP and KITTY. Kit. I must know where he is, and will know too, Mr mpertinence! Sharp. Not of me you won't. [Aside.] He's not within, 1 tell you, Mrs Kitty; I don't know myself: do you think I can conjure? Kit. But I know you will lie abominably; therefore don't trifle with me. I come from my mistress, Melissa; you know, I suppose, what's to be done to-morrow morning? Sharp. Ay, and to-morrow night too, girl! Kit. Not if I can help it. Aside.]-But come,where is your master? for see him I must. Sharp. Pray, Mrs Kitty, what's your opinion of this match between my master and your mistress? Kit. Why I have no opinion of it at all; and yet most of our wants will be reliev'd by it too: for instance now, your master will get a fortune, that's what I'm afraid he wants; my mistress will get a husband, that's what she has wanted for some time: you will have the pleasure of my conversation, and I an opportunity of breaking your head for your impertinence. Sharp. Madam, I'm your most humble servant! But I'll tell you what, Mrs Kitty, I am positively against the match; for, was I a man of my master's fortune Kit. You'd marry, if you cou'd, and mend it. Ha, ha, ha! Pray, Sharp, where does your master's estate lie? Gayl. Oh the devil! what a question was there! [Aside. Sharp. Lie, lie; why it lies-faith, I can't name any particular place, it lies in so many his effects are divided, some here, some there; his steward hardly knows himself. Kit: Scatter'd, scatter'd, I suppose. But harkee, Sharp, what's become of your furniture? You seem to be a little bare here at present. Gayl. What, has she found out that too? [Aside. Sharp. Why, you must know, as soon as the wedding was fixed, my master order'd me to remove goods into a friend's house, to make room for a ball which he designs to give here the day after the marriage. Kit. The luckiest thing in the world! for my mistress designs to have a ball and entertainment here to-night before before the marriage; and that's my business with your ma ster. Sharp. The devil it is! [Aside. Kit. She'll not have it public, she designs to invite only eight or ten couple of friends. Sharp. No more? Kitty. No more: and she ordered me to desire your master not to make a great entertainment. Sharp. Oh, never fear———— Kit. Ten or a dozen little nice things, with some fruit, I believe, will be enough in all conscience. Sharp. Oh, curse your conscience! [Aside. Kit. And what do you think I have done of my own head? Sharp. What? Kit. I have invited all my lord Stately's servants to come and see you, and have a dance in the kitchen; won't your master be surpriz’d? Sharp. Much so indeed! Kit. Well, be quick and find out your master, and make what haste you can with your preparations: you have no time to tose.-Prithee, Sharp, what's the matter with you? I have not seen you for some time, and you seem to look a little thin. Sharp. Oh my unfortunate face! [Aside.] I'm in pure good health, thank you, Mrs Kitty; and I'll assure you, I have a very good stomach, never better in my life, and I am as full of vigour, hussy! [Offers to kiss her. Kit. What, with that face! well, bye, bye, [going]oh, Sharp, what ill-looking fellows are those, were standing about your door when I came in? They want your master too, I suppose. Sharp. Hum! Yes, they are waiting for him.They are some of his tenants out of the country that want to pay him some money. Kit. Tenants! what, do you let his tenants stand in the street? Sharp. They chuse it; as they seldom come to town they are willing to see as much of it as they can, when they do; they are raw, ignorant, honest people. Kit. Well, I must run home, farewel! -But do you hear? Get something substantial for us in the kitchen a ham, a turkey, or what you will-We'll be very merry; B 6 -and and be sure to remove the tables and chairs away there too, that we may have room to dance; I can't bear to be confined in my French dances; tal, tal, tal, [dancing.] Well, adieu! Without any compliment, I shall die if I don't see [Exit Kitty. Sharp. And without any compliment, I pray heaven you may! you soon. Enter GAYLESS. [They look for some time sorrowful at each other.] Gayl. Oh, Sharp! Sharp. Oh, master! Gayl. We are certainly undone! Sharp. That's no news to me. Gayl. Eight or ten couple of dancers -ten or a dozen little nice dishes, with some fruit-my lord Stately's servant's, ham and turkey! Sharp. Say no more; the very sound creates an appetite: and I am sure of late I have had no occasion for whet ters and provocatives. Gayl. Curs'd misfortune! What can we do? Sharp. Hang ourselves; 1 see no other remedy; except you have a receipt to give a ball and a supper without meat or music. Gayl. Melissa has certainly heard of my bad circumstances, and has invented this scheme to distress me, and break offthe match. Sharp. I don't believe it, Sir: begging your pardon. Gayi. No, why did her maid then make so strick an enquiry into my fortune and affairs ? Sharp. For two very substantial reasons; the first to satisfy a curiosity, natural to her as a woman; the second, to have the pleasure of my conversation, very natural to her as a woman of taste and understanding. Gayl. Prithee be more serious: is not our All at stake? Sharp. Yes, Sir: and yet that All of ours is of so little consequence, that a man, with a very small share of philosophy may part from it without much pain or uneasiness. However, Sir, I'll convince you in half an hour, that Mrs Melissa knows nothing of your circumstances, and I'll tell you what too, Sir, she shan't be here to-night, and yet you shall marry her to-morrow morning. Gayl. How, how, dear Sharp? Sharp. Sharp. 'Tis here, here, Sir! warm, warm, and delay will cool it; therefore I'll away to her, and do you be a merry as love and poverty will permit you. Would you succeed, a faithful friend depute, I am the man, and I hope you neither dispute my friendship or qualification. Gayl. Indeed, I don't; prithee be gone. SCENE, Melissa's Lodgings. Enter MELISSA and KITTY. [Exeunt. Mel. You surprise me, Kitty; the master not at home! the man in confusion! no furniture in the house! and illlooking fellows about the doors! 'tis alla riddle. Kit. But very easy to be explain'd. Mel. Prithee explain it then, nor keep me longer in suspence. your children Kit. The affair is this, madam; Mr Gayless is over head and ears in debt; you are over head and ears in love; you'll marry him to-morrow; the next day, your whole fortune goes to his creditors, and you and are to live comfortable upon the remainder. Mel. I cannot think him base. Kit. But I know they are all baseyoung, and very ignorant of the sex; I am young too, but have more experience: you never was in love before; I have been in love with an hundred, and try'd 'em all; and know 'em to be a parcel of barbarous, perjur'd, deluding, bewitching devils. -You are very Mel. The low wretches you have had to do with, may answer the character you give 'em; but Mr GaylessKit. Is a man, madam, Mel. I hope so, Kitty, or I would have nothing to do with him. Kit. With all my heart-I have given you my sentiments upon the occasion, and shall leave you to your own inclinations. Mel, Oh, madam, I am much obliged to you for your great |