UNION OF LITERARY COMPOSITIONS.

At a large literary party in Edinburgh, in the course of conversation, it was mentioned that a certain well-known literary character had written two poems, one called "The Pebble," the other "The Ocean;" that he was offering them to the booksellers, who, however, would not accede to his terms of publication; and that the worthy author. was, therefore, puzzled not a little as to what. he should do with his productions. "Why," remarked a sarcastic gentleman who was present, "I think the doctor could not do better than throw the one into the other."

LEARNING GREEK.

A shoemaker in Piccadilly, determined to astonish the world, had put up a motto from Euripides over his window. Bannister happened to be passing with Porson. "That is Greek," said Bannister. "What! are you acquainted with Greek ?" asked the Professor, with a laugh. "I know it by sight," was the happy reply.

SOLECISM IN MANNERS.

The Duke of Sussex was at one period a determined angler, and kept a punt at Shepperton for the purpose. Here he was attended by the famous Peter Purdy, who invariably answered "Yes," or "No, your Royal Rodney," to any questions which the Duke asked. Peter, on being reminded of the great mistake he thus committed, said that for the life of him he could not help it. He had heard so much of Lord Rodney from his father, who was one of his crew, that he protested he could think of no other name whenever he spoke to a great man.

THE PATE D'AMOUR.

Ude, when in Paris, had fallen in love, and matters were nearly brought to matrimony. Previous to this conclusion, Ude, however, prudently made a calculation (he being an excellent steward) of the expenses of married life, and in the estimate set down Madame's expenditure at so many louis. Now, Ude customarily conveyed his billets in an envelope of pâté d'Amande; but, unfortunately, in the confusion of love and cookery, the estimate of housekeeping was sent instead of the proposal. The next day, Ude was apprized of his mistake by a letter from his mistress, stating the high estimation in which she held M. Ude; but that, as louis were too small an allowance for a woman of fashion, she must decline the honour of becoming Madame Ude. The story got wind, and, by a sort of lucus-a-non-lucendo analogy, the name of Pâté d'Amande was changed into Pâté d'Amour.

FAMILIAR BLANK VERSE.

John Kemble's most familiar table-talk often flowed into blank verse. Sir Walter Scott used to chuckle with particular glee over the recollection of an excursion to the vale of Ettrick, near which river the parties were pursued by a bull. "Come, King John," said he, "we must even take the water;" and accordingly he and his daughter plunged into the stream. But King John halting on the bank, exclaimed, in his usual solemn manner,

"The flood is angry, Sheriff, Methinks I'll get me up into a tree." In the same strain was Mrs. Siddons accustomed to talk. Scott (who was a capital mimic) often repeated her tragic exclamation to a foot-boy, during a dinner at Ashestiel"You've brought me water, boy; I asked for beer."

CUTTING AN ACQUAINTANCE.

George Selwyn happening to be at Bath when it was nearly empty, was induced, for the mere purpose of killing time, to cultivate the acquaintance of an elderly gentleman he was in the habit of meeting at the Rooms. In the height of the following season, Selwyn encountered his old associate in St. James'sstreet. He endeavoured to pass unnoticed, but in vain. "What! don't you recollect me?" exclaimed the cuttee. "I recollect you perfectly," replied Selwyn; "and when I next go to Bath I shall be most happy to become acquainted with you again.”

SIR JAMES MACKINTOSH.

Sir James Mackintosh had a great deal of humour; and, among many other examples of it, he kept a dinner party at his own house for two or three hours in a roar of laughter, playing upon the simplicity of a Scotch cousin, who had mistaken the Rev. Sydney Smith for his gallant synonym, the hero of Acre.

Curran, when Master of the Rolls, said to Mr. Grattan, "You would be the greatest man of your age, Grattan, if you would buy a few yards of red tape, and tie up your bills and papers." This was the fault or mis

fortune of Sir James Mackintosh: he never knew the use of red tape, and was utterly unfit for the common business of life. That a guinea represents a quantity of shillings, and that it would barter for a quantity of cloth, he was well aware; but the accurate number of the baser coin, or the just measurement of the manufactured articles to which he was entitled for his gold, he could never learn, and it was impossible to teach him.

A Kentuckian visited a merchant at New York, with whom, after dinner, he drank wine and smoked cigars, spitting on the carpet, much to the annoyance of his host, who desired a spittoon to be brought for his troublesome visitor; he, however, pushed it away with his foot, and when it was replaced, he kicked it away again, quite unaware of its use. When it had been thrice replaced, the Kentuckian drawled out to the servant who had brought it: "I tell you what; you've been pretty considerable troublesome with that ere thing, I guess; if you put it there again, I'm hung if I don't spit in it."

ANCESTRAL DISPUTE.

The late Mr. Huddlestone believed himself to be lineally descended from Athelstane,of which his name was allowed to be an undeniable corruption; and amongst others by the late Duke of Norfolk. These two worthies often met over a bottle to discuss the respective pretensions of their pedigrees; and on one of these occasions, when Mr. Huddlestone was dining with the Duke, the discussion was prolonged till the descendant of the Saxon Kings fairly rolled from his chair upon the floor. One of the younger members of the family hastened, by the Duke's desire, to re-establish him, but he sternly repelled the proffered hand of the cadet. "Never," he hiccuped out, "shall it be said that the head of the house of Huddlestone was lifted from the ground by a younger branch of the house of Howard." "Well, then, my good old friend," said the good-natured Duke, "I must try what I can do for you myself. The head of the house of Howard is too drunk to pick up the head of the house of Huddlestone, but he will lie down beside him with all the pleasure in the world:" so saying, the Duke also took his place upon the floor. The concluding part of this anecdote has been plagiarised, and applied to other people, but the authenticity of this version may be relied on.- -Quarterly Re

view.

TURNPIKE-ROADS V. RAILWAYS.

The first important attempt made to improve the communications of Great Britain took place in the reign of Charles II. In the sixteenth year of the reign of that Monarch was established the first turnpikeroad where toll was taken, which intersected the counties of Hertford, Cambridge, and Huntingdon. It long remained, however, an isolated line of communication; and it was little more than a century ago that any extensive or effectual attempts were made, of a general character, to construct a good system of roads through the country.

Until the middle of the eighteenth century, most of the merchandise which was conveyed from place to place in Scotland was transported on pack-horses. Oatmeal, coals, turf, and even hay and straw, were carried in this manner through short distances; but when it was necessary to carry merchandise between distant places, a cart was used, a horse not being able to transport on his back a sufficient quantity of goods to pay the cost of the journey.

The time required by the common carriers to complete their journey seems, when compared with our present standard of speed, quite incredible. Thus, it is recorded that the carrier between Selkirk and Edinburgh, a distance of thirty-eight miles, required a fortnight for his journey, going and returning. The road lay chiefly along the bottom of the district called Gala-water, the bed of the stream, when not flooded, being the ground chosen as the most level and easy to travel on.

In 1678, a contract was made to establish a coach for passengers between Edinburgh and Glasgow, a distance of forty-four miles. This coach was drawn by six horses, and the journey between the two places, to and fro, was completed in six days. Even so recently as the year 1750, the stage-coach from Edinburgh to Glasgow took thirty-six hours to make the journey. In 1849, the same journey was made, by a route three miles longer, in one hour and a half!

In the year 1763 there was but one stagecoach between Edinburgh and London. This started once a month from each of these cities. It took a fortnight to perform the journey. At the same epoch the journey between London and York required four days.

In 1835 there were seven coaches started daily between London and Edinburgh, which performed the journey in less than fortyeight hours. In the present year, 1849, the same journey is performed by railway in twelve hours!

In 1763, the number of passengers conveyed by the coaches between London and Edinburgh could not have exceeded about twenty-five monthly, and by all means of conveyance whatever did not exceed fifty. In 1835, the coaches alone conveyed between these two capitals about one hundred and forty passengers daily, or four thousand

monthly. But, besides these, several steamships, of enormous magnitude, sailed weekly between the two places, supplying all the accommodation and luxury of floating hotels, and completing the voyage at the same rate as the coaches, in less than fortyeight hours.

As these steam-ships conveyed at least as many passengers as the coaches, we may estimate the actual number of passengers transported between the two places monthly at eight thousand. Thus the intercourse between London and Edinburgh in 1835 was one hundred and sixty times greater than in 1763. At present the intercourse is increased in a much higher ratio, by the improved facility and greater cheapness of railway transport.

Arthur Young, who travelled in Lancashire in 1770, has left us in his "Tour" the following account of the state of the roads at that time:-"I know not," he says, "in the whole range of language, terms sufficiently expressive to describe this infernal road. Let me most seriously caution all travellers who may accidentally propose to travel this terrible country to avoid it as they would the devil, for a thousand to one they break their necks or their limbs by overthrows or breakings down. They will here meet with ruts which I actually measured, four feet deep, and floating with mud, only from a wet summer. What, therefore, must it be after a winter? The only mending it receives is tumbling in some loose stones, which serve no other purpose than jolting a carriage in the most intolerable manner. These are not merely opinions, but facts; for I actually passed three carts broken down in these eighteen miles of execrable memory."

And again he says (speaking of a turnpike-road near Warrington, now superseded by the Grand Junction Railway), "This is a paved road, most infamously bad. Any person would imagine the people of the country had made it with a view to immediate destruction, for the breadth is only sufficient for one carriage; consequently it is cut at once into ruts; and you may easily conceive what a break-down, dislocating road, ruts cut through a pavement must be."

He

Nor was the state of the roads in other parts of the north of England better. says of a road near Newcastle, now superseded by a railway, "A more dreadful road cannot be imagined. I was obliged to hire two men at one place to support my chaise from overturning. Let me persuade all travellers to avoid this terrible country, which must either dislocate their bones with broken pavements, or bury them in muddy sand. It is only bad management that can occasion such very miserable roads in a country so abounding with towns, trade, and manufactures."

Now, it so happens that the precise ground over which Mr. Young travelled in this manner less than eighty years ago, is at present literally reticulated with railways, upon