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commit new. Virgins came hither who seldom went was obliged to take it up, in token of his accepting virgins away. Nor was this a convent peculiarly the challenge. wicked; every convent at that period was equally “ Upon this, the priest supplied his champion, for it lond of pleasure, and gave a boundless loose to was not lawful for the clergy to fight; and the deappetite. The laws allowed it; each priest had a fendant and plaintiff, according to custom, were put right to a favourite companion, and a power of dis. in prison; both ordered to fast and pray, every carding her as often as he pleased. The laity grum- method being previously used to induce both to a bled, quarrelled with their wives and daughters, bated confession of truth. After a month's imprisonment, their confessors, and maintained them in opulence the hair of each was cut, the bodies anointed with and ease. These, these were happy times, Mr. Rig-oil, the field of battle appointed and guarded by marcle ; these were times of piety, bravery, and sim- soldiers, while his majesty presided over the whole plicity!" "Not so very happy, neither, good madam; in person. Both the champions were sworn not to pretty much like the present; those that labour seek victory either by fraud or magic. They prayed carve; and those that do nothing, wear fine clothes and confessed upon their knees; and after these and lise in luxury."
ceremonies, the rest was left to the courage and con"Ia this manner the fathers lived, for some years, duct of the combatants. As the champion whom the without molestation; they transgressed, confessed prior had pitched upon, had fought six or eight times themselves to each other, and were forgiven. One upon similar occasions, it was no way extraordinary eveaing, however, our prior keeping a lady of dis- to find him victorious in the present combat. In tinction somewhat too long at confession, her husband short, the husband was discomfited; he was taken thexpectedly came in upon them, and testified all from the field of battle, stripped of his shirt, and the indignation which was natural upon such an oc- after one of his legs was cut off
, as justice ordained casion. The prior asured the gentleman that it was in such cases, he was hanged as a terror to future the devil who had put it into his heart ; and the lady offenders. These, these were the times, Mr. Rig. was very certain, that she was under the influence marole ! you see how much more just, and wise, and of magic, er she could never have behaved in so un valiant, our ancestors were than us."
“ I rather taitafül a manner. The husband, however, was not fancy, madam, that the times then were pretty much to be put off by such evasions, but summoned botle like our own; where a multiplicity of laws give a before the tribunal of justice. His proofs were fla- judge as much power as a want of law; since he is past, and he expected large damages. Such, indeed, ever sure to find among the number some to counhe had a right to expect, were the tribunals of those tenance his partiality." des coustituted in the same manner as they are now. “Our convent, victorious over their enemies, now Ple cause of the priest was to be tried before an as gave a loose to every demonstration of joy. The really of priests; and a layman was to expect re- lady became a nun, the prior was made bishop, and een voly from their impartiality and candour. three Wicklifites were burned in the illuminations
dat plea then do you think the prior made to ob- and fire-works that were made on the present occamint this accusation? He denied the fact, and sion. Our convent now began to enjoy a very high shallenged the plaintiff to try the merits of their cause degree of reputation. There was not one in Lonboy single combat. It was a little hard, you may be don that had the character of hating hereticş so ture, upon the poor gentleman, not only to be made much as ours. Ladies of the first distinction chose cuckold, but to be obliged to fight a duel into the from our convent their confessors; in short, it floubarquin; yet such was the justice of the times. The rished, and might have fourished to this hour, but place threw down bis glove, and the injured husband for a fatal accident which terminated in its over
throw, The lady whom the prior had placed in a to be supposed it could subsist any longer; the fanunnery, and - whom he continued to visit for sometbers were ordered to decamp, and the house was time with great punctuality, began at last to perceive once again converted into a tavern. The king 602 that she was quite forsaken. Secluded from conver- ferred it on one of his cast mistresses; she was como sation, as usual, she now entertained the visions of stituted landlady by royal authority; and as the a devotee ; found, herself strangely disturbed; but tavern was in the neighbourhood of the court, sa hesitated in determining, whether she was possessed the mistress a very polite woman, it began 10 bait by an angel or a dæmon. She was not long in sus more business than ever; and sometimes look mut pence; for, upon vomiting a large quantity of crooked less than four shillings a day. pins, and finding the palms of her hands turned out “ Under the care of this lady, the tavern gren wards, she quickly concluded that she was possessed into great reputation; the courtiers had not by the devil
. She soon lost entirely the use of speech ; learned to game, but they paid it off by drintos; and, when she seemed to speak, every body that was drunkenness is ever the vice of a barbarous, present perceived that her voice was not her own, gaming of a luxurious age. They had not such itu but that of the devil within her. In short, she was quent entertainments as the moderns have, but more bewitched; and all the difficulty lay in determining more expensive and more luxurious in those they who it could be that bewitched her. The nuns and had. All their fooleries were more elaborate, un monks all demanded the magician's name, but the more admired by the great and the vulgar than bor, devil made no reply; for he knew they had no au- A courtier has been known to spend his whole in thority to ask questions. By the rules of witchcraft, tune at a single feast, a king to mortgage bis duz when an evil spirit has taken possession, he may re- nions to furnish out the frippery of a tourmerk fuse to answer any questions asked him, unless they There were certain days appointed for riot and are put by a bishop, and to these he is obliged to re- bauchery, and to be sober at such times was reped ply. A bishop, therefore, was sent for, and now the a crime. kings themselves set the example ; 2x whole secret came out : the devil reluctantly owned have seen monarchs in this room drunk before e that he was a servant of the prior; that, by his com- entertainment was half concluded. These were the mand, he resided in his present habitation ; and that, times, sir, when kings kept mistresses, and got drick without his command, he was resolved to keep in in public; they were too plain and simple in possession. The bishop was an able exorcist; he happy times to hide their-vices, and act the byparissa drove the devil out by force of mystical arms; the as now. prior was arraigned for witchcraft ; the witnesses "Upon this lady's decease the tavern was saints were strong and numerous agaiust him, not less than sively occupied by adventurers, bullies, pimps us. fourteen persons being by, who had heard the devil gamesters. Towards the conclusion of the recen talk Latit. There was no resisting such a cloud of Henry VII. gaming was more universally practise witnesses ; the prior was condemned ; and he who England than even now. Kings themselves have been had assisted at so many burnings, was burned him known to play off, at Primero, not only all the self in turn. These were times, Mr. Rigmarole ; the aud jewels they could part with, but the very inan people of those times were not infidels, now, but in churches. The lasi Henry played away, in na sincere believers !" “ Equally faulty with ourselves : very room, not only the four great bells of St P3's they believed what the devil was pleased to tell cathedral, but the fine image of St. Paul, which sa them; and we seem resolved, at last, to believe nei- upon the top of the spire, to Sir Miles Partridge. ther God nor devil."
took them down the next day, and sold then by a. “ After such a stain upon the convent, it was not tion,
ARTICLES FOUND IN A KITCHEN DRAWER.
"The last hostess of note I find upon record was in the house, and was now got into the story of the Jane Rouse. She was born among the lower ranks cracked glass in the dining-room. of the people ; and by frugality and extreme complaisance, contrived to acquire a moderate fortune: this she might have enjoyed for many years, had she not unfortunately quarrelled with one of her neigh
Written in the age of Shakspeare. bours, a woman who was in high repute for sanctity Three aprons, two dusters, the face of a pig, through the whole parish. In ihe times of which 1 A dirty jack towel, a dish-clout and wig; speak, two women seldom quarrelled, that one did A foot of a stocking, three caps and a frill, pot accuse the other of witchcraft, and she who first A busk and six buttons, mouse-trap and a quill; contrived to voinit crooked pins was sure to come off A comb and a thimble, with Madona bands, victorious. The scandal of a modern tea-table dif- A box of specific for chops in the hands ; fers widely from the scandal of former times; the Some mace and some cloves tied up in a rag, fascination of a lady's eyes at present, is regarded as An empty thread paper and blue in a bag; i compliment; but if a lady, formerly, should be Short pieces of ribbon, both greasy and black, aceased of having witchcraft in her eyes, it were much A grater and nutmeg, the key of the jack ; better both for her soul and body, that she had no An inch of wax candle, a steel and a flint, eyes at all.
A bundle of matches, a parcel of mint; * lo short, Jane Rouse was accused of witchcraft; A lump of old suet, a crimp for the paste, and though she made the best defence she could, it A pair of red garters, a belt for the waist ; yras all to no purpose ; she was taken from her own A rusty bent skewer, a broken brass cock, has to the bar or the Old Bailey, condemned and ex. Some onions and tinder, and the draw'r lock; erinted accordingly. These were times, indeed! when A bag for the pudding, a whetstone and string, even women could not scold in safety.
A penny cross-bun, and a new curtain ring; " Since her time the tavern underwent several re- A print for the butter, a dirty chemise, požations, according to the spirit of the times, or the Two pieces of soap, and a large slice of cheese ; aspositiou of the reigning monarch. It was this day Five teaspoons of tin, a large lump of rosin, brothel, and the next a conventicle for enthusiasts. The feet of a hare, and corks by the dozen ; I zas ope year noted for harbouring whigs, and the A card to tell fortunes, a sponge and a can, ex infamous for a retreat to tories. Some years A pen without ink, and a small patty-pan;
I was in high vogue, but at present it seems de- A rolling-pin pasted, and common prayer book, éning. This only may be remarked in general, that, Are the things which I found in the drawer of the Center taverns Bourish most, the times are then
cook. extravagant and luxurious.”_" Lord! Mrs. Gerily," interrupted I, " you have really deceived
l'expected a romance, and here you have been The Rev. Mr. Milne, in a Report of the Missionary that tour giving me only a description of the spirit Society for China, says, “We want, sir, fifty millions the times ; If you have nothing but tedious remarks of New Testaments for China ; and after that about traunicate, seek some other hearer; I am de- one-sixth of the population only would be supplied. rised to bearken only to stories.”
I would ask no higher honour on earth, than to disThad scarce concluded, when my eyes and ears tribute the said number.” Now, if Mr. Milne had sed opened to my landlord, who had been all this commenced the distribution of the said number at
givag me an account of the repairs he had made the time the Ark rested on Mount Ararat, and had
A LONG TASK.
continued to distribute forty-three Testaments per as he neither wants, nor deserves, but only deste day, Sundays excepted, he would have on hand, (pardon, dread sir, an expression you are pretty exci April 4, 1817, seven hundred and thirteen thousand, used to) and insists upon it. seven hundred and forty-seven. 01, should he now Your petitioner is little apt, and always unwilling, begin his work, and distribute ten each hour during to speak advantageously of himself; but as sza ten hours per day, he would end his labour on the degree of justice is due to one's self, as well as » 27th day of January, 3411, at one o'clock in the fore others, he begs leave to represent, that his loyalty to noon !!!
your majesty has always been unshaken, even in the
worst of times; that particularly in the late unus PARALLEL BETWEEN CHURCHILL, DUKE
tural rebelliou, when the young Pretender bad adBOROUGH, AND CHURCHILL, THE POET.
vanced as far as Derby, at the head of an army of ut In Anna's wars immortal Churchill rose,
least three thousand men, composed of the flower di And, great in arms, subdued Britannia's foes ;
the Scotch nobility and gentry, who bad valve A greater Churchill now commands our praise,
enough to avow, and courage enough to venture And the palm yields her empire to the bays; lives in support of, their real principles, you pro Tho' John fought nobly at bis army's head, tioner did not join him, as unquestionably ne az-** And slew his thousands with the balls of lead, have done, had he been so inclined; but, on se Yet must the hero to the bard submit,
coutrary, raised at the public expense, sixteen ce Who hurls, unmatch'd, the thunderbolts of wit. panies of one hundred men each, in defence of Love's VERDICT.
majesty's undoubted right to the imperial crowd A coroner's jury having sat on the body of a
these realms, which service remains to this bus
young lady in Baltimore, America, who had hung herself in
uurewarded. a fit of love frenzy, brought in their verdict - Died civil list must necessarily be in a very weat ze
Your petitioner is well aware that your majesiya by the visitation of Cupid. A reasonable novelty.
languid condition, after the various and profase esde PETITION OF LORD CHESTERFIELD.
cuations it has undergone; but at the sine tn * To the King's most excellent Majesty, the humble humbly hopes, that an argument wbich does not on
Petition of Philip, Earl of Chesterfield, Knight of to have been urged against any other person * the most noble Order of the Garter, &c.
soever, will not in a singular manner be urged & Sheweth, That your petitioner, being rendered him, especially as he has some reasons to belien by deafness as useless and inefficient as most of his the deficiencies in the pension list will by vo frana contemporaries are by nature, hopes in common with be the last to be made good by parliameni. them, to share your majesty's royal favour and bounty, Your petitioner begs leave lo observe that a sul whereby he may be enabled to save or to spend, as he pension is disgraceful, as it intimates opprobries it may think proper, a great deal more than he possibly digence on the part of the receiver, and a degra, 3 can at present.
sort of dole or charity on the part of the grek. That your petitioner having had the honour to serve that a great one implies dignity and at genre et your majesty in several very lucrative employments, one side ; on the other, esteein and cu teman seems thereby entitled to a lucrative retreat from which doubtless your majesty must entertaio in s business, and to enjoy otium cum dignitate, that is, highest degree for those great personages wile pipe leisure and a large pension,
table names glare in capitals upon your keyin Your petitioner humbly apprehends, that he nary list. Your petitioner humbly tatters bure!. has a justifiable claim to a considerable pension, that upon this principle less than three tirocin
pounds a year will not be proposed to him, and if " That though some fops of Celia prate, made gold, the more agreeable.
“ Yet be not hers the praise; Your petitioner persuades bimself that your ma “ For, if she should be passing straight, jesty will not impute this his humble application to “ Hem! she may thank her stays. any mean idterested motive, of which he has always " Each fool of Delia's tigure talks, had the utrèost abhorrence. No, sir! he confesses his " And celebrates her fame, weakness: honour alone is his object; honour is bis “ But for my part, whene'er she walks, passioa ; that honour which is sacred to him as a peer, “I vow I think she's lame. and tender to bim as a gentleman; that honour, in " And see Ma'am Harriet toss her head, short, to which he has sacrificed all other consider " Lawk, how the creature stares : acions.-It is upon this single principle that your Well, well, thank heaven, it can't be said, petitioner solicits an honour, which at present in so “I give myself such airs !" extraordinary a manner adorns the British Peerage ; The Ode concludes with the following stanzas: ad which, in the most shining periods of ancient To woman every charm was given, Greece, distioguished the greatest men, who were Desigu'd by all indulgent heaven, ind in the Prytaneum at the expense of the public.
To soften grief or care ; l'pon this bonour, far dearer to your petitioner For ye were form’d to bless mankind, then bis hite, he begs leave, in the most solemn To harmonize and soothe the mind : 100er, to assure your majesty, that in case you Indeed, indeed, ye were. sball be pleased to grant this his most modest request, But when from those sweet lips we hear be will honourably support and promote, to the ut. Ill nature's whisper, Envy's sneer, cost of his abilities, the very worst measures, that Your power that moment dies : ise very worst ministers can suggest ; but, at the Each coxcomb makes your name his sport, * e time, should he unfortunately, and in a singu- And fools when angry will retort bar inadder, be branded by a refusal, he thinks him What men of sense despise. se'l obliged in tonout to declare, that he will, with Leave then such vain disputes as these, *** utroost acrimony, oppose the very best measures and take a nobler road to please, -winch your majesty yourself shall ever propose or
Let Candour guide your way ; pouzote. And your petitioner, &c. So shall you daily conquests gain,
And captives, happy in your chain, EXTRACTS FROM AN ODE TO SCANDAL
Be proud to own your sway. 54*, non indeed. I burn with sacred fires, T scandal's self that every thought inspires ! I loved zil poteut Genius! now I feel lis working magic through each artery steal ; During the late American war, a soldier, who had Each moment to my prying eyes
been wounded and honourably discharged, (but, perthe fresh disfigur'd beauties rise ;
haps, not paid,) being destitute and benighted, La ta powert I perceive some flaw
knocked at the door of an Irish farmer, when the folwat een ill-pature Dever saw.
lowing dialogue ensued : Eat bush! some airy whisperer hints,
Patrick-And who the devil are you now? la accents wisely faint,
Soldier~My name is John Wilson. * Dhrine Cleora rather squints :
And where the devil are you going from, ** Maria uses paint!
John Wilson !