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Enter ANTONIO and SEBASTIAN. Seb. I would not, by my will, have troubled you; [pains, But, since you make your pleasure of your I will no further chide you.
Ant. I could not stay behind you; my desire, More sharp than filed steel, did spur me forth; And not all love to see yon, (though so much, As might have drawn que to a longer voyage,) But jealousy what might befall your travel, Being skilless in these parts; which to a
Unguided, and unfriended, often prove
Seb. I am not weary, and 'tis long to night; I pray you, let us satisfy our eyes With the memorials, and the things of fame, That do renown this city.
Ant. 'Would, you'd pardon me; I do not without danger walk these streets : Once in a sea-fight, 'gainst the Count his galleys, I did some service; of such note indeed, That, were I ta'en here, it would scarce be answer'd. [people.
Seb. Belike, yon slew great number of his
Albeit the quality of the time, and quarrel,
Most of our city did: only myself stood out:
To the Elephant.
I do remember. [Exeunt.
SCENE IV. Olivia's Garden.
Enter OLIVIA and MARIA.
Oli. I have sent after him: He says, he'll
How shall I feast him? what bestow on him?
Mal. Sweet lady, ho, ho. [Smiles fantas Olt. Smil'st thou ? (tically.
I sent for thee upon a sad 5 occasion.
Mal. Sad, lady? I could be sad: This does make some obstruction in the blood, this crossgartering; But what of that, if it please the eye of one, it is with me as the very true son net is: Please one, and please all.
Olt. Why, how dost thou, man? what is the matter with thee?
Mal. Not black in my mind, though yellow in my legs: it did come to his hands, and commands shall be executed. I think, we do know the sweet Roman hand.
Oli. Wilt thou go to bed, Malvolio?
Oli. God comfort thee! Why dost thou smile so, and kiss thy hand so oft?
Mar. How do you, Malvolio?
Mal. At your request? Yes; Nightingales answer daws.
Mur. Why appear you with this ridiculous boldness before my lady?
Mal. Be not afraid of greatness:-Twas
Hot weather madness.
Ser. Madam, the young gentleman of the count Orsino's is returned; I could hardly entreat him back: he attends your ladyship's pleasure.
Oli. I'll come to him. [Exit Servant.] Good Maria, let this fellow be looked to. Where's my cousin Toby? Let some of my people have a special care of him; I would not have him miscarry for the half of my dowry.
[Exeunt OLIVIA and MARIA. Mal. Oh, ho! do you come near me now? no worse man than sir Toby to look to me? This concurs directly with the letter: she sends him on purpose, that I may appear stubborn to him; for she incites me to that in the letter. Cast thy humble slough, says she; be opposite with a kinsman, surly with servants, let thy tongue tang with arguments of state, -put thyself into the trick of singularity; --and, consequently, sets down the manner how; as, a sad face, a reverend carriage, a slow tongue, in the habit of some sir of note, and so forth. I have limed her*; but it is Jove's doing, and Jove make me thankful! And, when she went away now, Let this fellow be looked to: Fellow+! not Malvolio, nor after my degree, but fellow. Why, every thing ad heres together; that no dram of a scruple, no scruple of a scruple, no obstacle, no incredulous or unsafe circumstance,-What can be said? Nothing, that can be, can come between me and the full prospect of my hopes. Well, Jove, not I, is the doer of this, and he is to be thanked.
Re-enter MARIA, with Sir TOBY BELCH, and FABIAN.1
Sir To. Which way is he, in the name of sanctity? If all the devils in hell be drawn in little, and Legion himself possessed him, yet I'll speak to him.
Fub. Here he is, here he is :-How is't with you, sir? how is't with you, man?
Mal. Go off; I discard you; let me enjoy my private; go off.
Mar. Lo, how hollow the fiend speaks within him! did not I tell you?-Sir Toby, my lady prays you to have a care of him.
not the way: Do you not see, you move him? let me alone with him.
Fab. No way but gentleness; gently, gently: the fiend is rough,and will not be roughly used. Sir To. Why, how now, my bawcock how dost thou, chuck? Mal. Sir?
Caught her as a bird with birdlime. A play among boys.
Sir To. Ay, Biddy, come with me. What, man! 'tis not for gravity to play at cherry pit s with Satan Hang him, foul collier!
Mar. Get him to say his prayers; good sir Toby, get him to pray.
Mal. My prayers, minx?
Mar. No, I warrant you, he will not hear of godliness.
Mal. Go, hang yourselves all! you are idle shallow things: I am not of your element; you shall know more hereafter. [Exit. Sir To. Is't possible?
Fab. If this were played upon a stage now, could condemn it as an improbable fiction. Sir To. His very genius hath taken the infection of the device, man.
Mar. Nay, pursue him now; lest the device take air, and taint.
Fab. Why, we shall make him mad, indeed. Mar. The house will be the quieter. Sir To. Come, we'll have him in a dark room, and bound. My niece is already in the belief that he is mad; we may carry it thus, for our pleasure, and his penance, till our very pastime, tired out of breath, prompt us to have mercy on him: at which time, we will bring the device to the bar, and crown thee for a finder of madinen. But see, but see.
Enter Sir ANDREW AGUE-CHEEK. Fab. More matter for a May morning. Sir And. Here's the challenge, read it; I warrant, there's vinegar and pepper in't. Fab. Is't so saucy?
Sir And. Ay,is it, I warrant him: do but read. Sir To. Give me. [reads.] Youth, whatsoever thou art, thou art but a scurvy fellow. Fab. Good, and valiant.
Sir To. Wonder not, nor admire not in thy mind, why I do call thee so, for I will show thee no reason for't.
Fab. A good note: that keeps you from the blow of the law.
Sir To. Thou comest to the lady Olivia, and in my sight she uses thee kindly: but thou liest in thy throat, that is not the matter I challenge thee for.
Fab. Very brief, and exceeding good sense
Sir To. I will way-lay thee going home; where if it be thy chance to kill me,——
Sir To. Thou killest me like a rogue and a villain.
Fub. Still you keep o'the windy side of the law: good.
Sir To. Fare thee well; And God have mercy upon one of our souls! He may have mercy upon mine; but my hope is better,
+ Companion. Jolly cock, beau and coq. Colliers were accounted great cheats.
and so look to thyself. Thy friend, as thou | usest him, and thy sworn enemy. ANDREW AGUE-CHEEK.
Sir To. If this letter move him not, his legs cannot: I'll give't him.
Mar. You may have very fit occasion for't; he is now in some commerce with my lady, and will by and by depart.
Sir To. Go, sir Andrew; scout me for him at the corner of the orchard, like a bum-bailiff: zo soon as ever thou seest him, draw; and, as thou drawest, swear horrible; for it comes to pass oft, that a terrible oath, with a swaggering accent sharply twanged off, gives manhood more approbation than ever proof itself would have earned him. Away.
Sir And. Nay, let me alone for swearing.
Sir To. Now will not I deliver his letter: for the behaviour of the young gentleman gives him out to be of good capacity and breeding; his employment between his lord and my niece confirms no less; therefore this letter, being so excellently ignorant, will breed no terror in the youth, he will find it comes from a cledpole. But, sir, I will deliver his challenge by word of mouth; set upon Ague check a notable report of valour; and drive the gentleman, (as, I know, his youth will aptly receive it,) into a most hideous opinion of his rage, skill, fury, and impetuosity. This will so fright them both, that they will kill one another by the look, like cockatrices.
Enter OLIVIA and VIOLA.
Fab. Here he comes with your niece: give them way, till he take leave, and presently after him.
Sir To. I will meditate the while upon some horrid message for a challenge.
[Exeunt Sir TOBY, FABIAN, and MARIA. Oli. I have said too much unte a heart of And laid mine honour too unchary out: [stone, There's something in me, that reproves my But such a headstrong potent fault it is, [fault; That it but mocks reproof. [bears,
done him, I know not; but thy intercepter, full of despite, bloody as the hunter, attends thee at the orchard end: dismount thy tuck 1, be yare in thy preparation, for thy assailant is quick, skilful, and deadly.
Vio. You mistake, sir; I am sure, no man hath any quarrel to me: my remembrance is very free and clear from any image of offence done to any man.
Sir To. You will find it otherwise, I assure you: therefore, if you hold your life at any price, betake yon to your guard; for your opposite hath in him what youth, strength, skill, and wrath, can furnish man withal.
Vio. I pray yon, sir, what is he?
Sir To. He is knight, dubbed with unhacked rapier, and on carpet consideration; but he is a devil in private brawl: souls and bodies hath he divorced three; and his incensement at this moment is so implacable, that satisfaction can be none but by pangs of death and sepulchre : hob, nob, is his word; give't, or take't.
Vio. I will return again into the house, and desire some conduct of the lady. I am no fighter. I have heard of some kind of men, that put quarrels purposely on others, to taste their valour: belike, this is a man of that quirk §.
Sir To. Sir, no; his indignation derives itself out of a very competent injury; therefore, get you on, and give him his desire. Back you shall not to the house, unless you undertake that with me, which with as much safety you might answer him: therefore, on, or strip your sword stark naked; for meddle you must, that's certain, or forswear to wear iron about you.
Vio. This is as uncivil as strange. I beseech you, do me this courteous office, as to know of the knight what my offence to him is; it is something of my negligence, nothing of my purpose.
Sir To. I will do so. Signior Fabian, stay you by this gentleman till my return. [Exit Sir TOBY. Vio. Pray you, sir, do you know of this matter?
Fab. I know, the knight is incensed against you, even to a mortal arbitrement; but nothing of the circumstance more.
Vio. I beseech you, what manner of man is he?
Vio. With the same 'haviour that your passion
Oli. Here, wear this jewel for me, 'tis my
A fiend, like thee, might bear my soul to hell.
Sir To. That defence thou hast, betake thee. to't; of what nature the wrongs are thou hast + Rapier.
Fab. Nothing of that wonderful promise, to read him by his form, as you are like to find him in the proof of his valour. He is, indeed, sir, the most skilful, bloody, and fatal opposite that you could possibly have found in any part of Illyria: Will you walk towards him? I will make your peace with him, if I can.
Vio. I shall be much bound to you for't: I am one that would rather go with sir priest than sir knight: I care not who knows so much of my mettle. [Exeunt Re-enter Sir TOBY, with Sir ANDREW. Sir To. Why, man, he's a very devil; I § Sort.
Sir And. Marry, will I, sir;-and, for that
1 Off. This is the man; do thy office.
You do mistake me, sir. 1 Off. No, sir, no jot; I know your favour well, [head.Though now you have no sea-cap on your Take him away; he knows I know him well. Ant. I must obey.-This comes with seeking you;
Sir And. Plague on't; an I thought he had been valiant, and so cunning in fence, I'd have seen him damned ere I'd have challenged him. Let him let the matter slip, and I'll give him my horse, grey Capilet.
But there's no remedy; I shall answer it.
Sir To. I'll make the motion: Stand here, make a good show on't; this shall end with-Than what befalls myself. You stand amaz'd; out the perdition of souls: Marry, I'll ride But be of comfort. your horse as well as I ride you. [Aside.
have not seen such a virago. I had a pass with him, rapier, scabbard, and all, and he gives me the stuck-in, with such a mortal motion, that it is inevitable; and on the answer, he pays yout as surely as your feet hit the ground they step on: They say, he has been fencer to the Sophy.
Sir And. Pox on't, I'll not meddle with
Sir To. Ay, but he will not now be pacified: Fabian can scarce hold him yonder.
Re-enter FABIAN and VIOLA.
I have his horse [to FA B.] to take up the quarrel; I have persuaded him, the youth's a devil.
Fab. He is as horribly conceited of him; and pants, and looks pale, as if a bear were at his heels.
Sir To. There's no remedy, sir; he will fight with you for his oath sake: marry, he hath better bethought him of his quarrel, and he finds that now scarce to be worth talking of: therefore draw, for the supportance of his vow; he protests he will not hurt you.
Vio. Pray God defend me! A little thing would make me tell them how much I lack [Aside.
of a man.
Fab. Give ground, if you see him furious. Sir To. Come, sir Andrew, there's no remedy; the gentleman will, for his honour's sake, have one bout with you: he cannot by the duello avoid it: but he has promised me, as he is a gentleman and a soldier, he will not hurt you. Come on; to't.
Sir And. Pray God he keep his oath!
Ant. Put up your sword;-If this young
Have done offence, I take the fault on me;
[Drawing. Sir To. You, sir? why, what are you? Ant. One, sir, that for his love dares yet do
Than you have heard him brag to you he will.
Sir To. I'll be with you anon. [To ANTONIO.
• Stoccata, an Italian term in fencing. § Laws of duel.
2 Of. Come, sir, away.
Ant. I must entreat of you some of that money.
Vie. What money, sir?
For the fair kindness you have show'd me here,
O heavens themselves
I snatch'd one half out of the jaws of death;
Ant. But, O, how vile an idol proves this
Ant. Lead me on.
Frove true, imagination! O, prove true!
Vio. He nam'd Sebastian; I my brother know
The Street before Olivia's House.
Seb. Go to, go to, thou art a foolish fellow;
Clo. Well held out, i'faith! No, I do not know you; nor I am not sent to you by my lady, to bid you come speak with her; nor your name is not master Cesario; nor this is not my nose neither.-Nothing that is so, is so. Seb. 1 pr'y thee, ventt thy folly somewhere else; Thou know'st not me. Clo. Vent my folly! He has heard that word of some great man, and now applies it to a fool. Vent my folly! I am afraid this great lubber, the world, will prove a cockney.-I pr'ythee now, ungird thy strangeness, and tell me what I shall vent to my lady, Shall I vent to her, that thou art coming? Seb. I pr'ythee, foolish Greek, depart from
appears, in leaving his friend here in necessity, and denying him; and for his cowardship, ask Fabian.
Fab. A coward, a most devout coward, religious in it.
Sir And. 'Slid, I'll after him again, and beat him.
There's money for thee; if you tarry longer,
Clo. By my troth, thou hast an open hand:
o'er the house.
Clo. This will I tell my lady straight: I
Sir To. Do, cuff him soundly, but never draw thy sword.
Sir And. An I do not,
Fub. Come, let's see the event. Sir To. I dare lay any money, 'twill be nothing yet. [Exeunt.
Sir To. Madam?
Oli. Will it be ever thus? Ungracious wretch, Fit for the mountains, and the barbarous caves, Where manners ne'er were preach'd! out of my sight!
Be not offended, dear Cesario:--
Or I am mad, or else this is a dream :—
In the reflection of my own figure. + Let out.
O, say so, and so be! [Exeunt.