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Shal. What, the fword and the word? do you ftudy them both, Mr Parfon?
Page. And youthful ftill, in your doublet and hose, this raw-rheumatic day?
Eva. There is reafons and caufes for it.
Page. We are come, to you, to do a good office, Mr Parfon.
Eva. Ferry well: what is it?
Page. Yonder is a most reverend gentleman, who, belike, having receiv'd wrong by fome perfon, is at moft odds with his own gravity and patience that ever you saw.
Shal. I have liv'd fourfcore years and upward; I never heard a man of his place, gravity and learning, fo wide of his own respect.
Eva. What is he?
Page. I think you know him; Mr Doctor Caius, the renowned French phyfician.
Eva. Got's will, and his paffion of my heart! I had as lief you fhould tell me of a mefs of porridge.
Eva. He has no more knowledge in Hibocrates and Galen; and he is a knave befides; a cowardly knave as you would defire to be acquainted withal. Page. I warrant you he's the man fhould fight with him.
Slen. O, fweet Anne Page!
Enter Hoft, Caius, and Rugby.
Shal. It appears fo by his weapons.-Keep them afunder-here comes Doctor Caius.
Page. Nay, good Mr Parfon, keep in your weapon. Shal. So do you, good Mr Doctor.
Hoft. Difarm them, and let them question; let them keep their limbs whole, and hack our Englifln
Gaius. I pray you, let-a me fpeak a word with your ear: wherefore vil you not meet-a me?
Eva. Pray you use your patience. In good time. Caius. "By gar you are de coward, de Jack dog John age..
Eva. Pray you let us not be laughing-stocks to other mens humours. I defire you in friendship, and will one way or other make you amends; I will knog your urinal about your knave's cogscomb, for miffing your meetings and appointinents.
Caius. Diable! Jack Rugby, mine host de Jarterre, have I not ftay for him to kill him? have I not, at de place I did appoint?
Eva. As I am a Chriftian's foul, now, look you, this is the place appointed; I'll be judgment by mine hoft of the Garter.
Hoft. Peace, I fay, Gallia and Gaul, French and Welch, foul-curer, and body-curer.
Caius. Ay, dat is very good, excellent.
Hoft. Peace, I fay; hear mine host of the Garter. Am I politic? am I fubtle? am I a Machiavel? fhall I lofe my doctor? no; he gives me the potions and the motions. Shall I lofe my parfon? my priest? my Sir Hugh? no; he gives me the proverbs and the noverbs. Give me thy hand, terreftrial; fo.Give me thy hand, celeftial; fo. Boys of art, I have deceiv'd you both: I have directed you to wrong places: your hearts are mighty, your skins are whole, and let burn'd fack be the iffue. Come, lay their fwords to pawn. Follow me, lad of peace. Follow, follow, follow.
Shal. Truft me, a mad hoft.-Follow, gentlemen, follow.
Slen. O, fweet Anne Page!
[Exeunt Shal. Slen, Page and Hoft. Caius. Ha! do I perceive dat? have you make a de-fot of us, ha, ha?
Eva. This is well, he has made us his vloutingftog. I defire you that we may be friends; and let us knog our prains together to be revenge on this fame fcald fcurvy cogging companion, the hoft of the Garter.
Caius. By gar with all my heart; he promise to bring me where is Anne Page; by gar he deceive
Eva. Well, I will fmite his noddles.-Pray you
The Street, in Windfor.
Enter Miftrefs Page and Robin.
Mrs Page. Nay, keep your way, little gallant; you were wont to be a follower, but now you are a leader. Whether had you rather lead mine eyes, or eye your master's heels?
Rob. I had rather, foriooth, go before you like a man, than follow him like a dwarf.
Mrs Page. O, you are a flattering boy; now, I fee, you'll be a courtier.
Ford. Well met, Mistress Page; whither go you? Mrs Page. Truly, Sir, to fee your wife; is fhe at home?
Ford. Ay; and as idle as fhe may hang together, for want of company. I think, if your husbands were dead, you two would marry.
Mrs Page. Be fure of that, two other husbands. Ford. Where had you this pretty weather-cock? Mrs Page. I cannot tell what the dickens his name is my husband had him of: what do you call your knight's name, firrah?
Rob. Sir John F'alfaff.
Ford. Sir John Falítaff?
Mrs Page. He, he; I can never hit on's name there is fuch a league between my good man and he. Is your wife at home, indeed?
Ford. Indeed fhe is.
Mrs Page. By your leave, Sir.-I am fick 'till I fee her. [Exeunt Mrs Page and Robin.
Ford. Has Page any brains? hath he any eyes?
hath he any thinking? fure they fleep; he hath no ufe of them. Why, this boy will carry a letter twenty mile, as eafy as a cannon will thoot point
blank twelve-fcore. He pieces out his wife's inclination; he gives her folly motion and advantage; and now he's going to my wife, and Falstaff's boy with her. A man may hear this fhower fing in the wind-and Falftaff's boy with her!-good plots they are laid, and our revolted wives flare damnation together. Well, I will take him, then torture my wife; pluck the borrow'd veil of modefty from the fo feeming Miftrefs Page, divulge Page himfelf for a fecure and wilful Acteon, and to thefe violent proceedings all my neighbours fhall cry aim. The clock gives me my cue, and my affrance bids me fearch; there I fhall find Falstaff. I fhall be rather praised for this than mocked; for it is as pofitive as the earth is firm, that Falstaff is there: I will go.
(To him) Enter Page, Shallow, Slender, Hoft, Evans, and Caius.
Shal. Page, &c. Well met, Mr Ford.
Ford. Trust me, a good knot: I have good chear at home, and I pray you, all go with me.
Shal. I muft excufe myself, Mr Ford.
Slen. And fo muft I, Sir; we have appointed to dine with Mrs Anne, and I would not break with her for more money than I'll speak of.
Shal. We have linger'd about a match between Anne Page and my coufin Slender, and this day we fhall have our answer.
Slen. I hope I have your good will, father Page Page. You have, Mr Slender: I ftand wholly for you; but my wife, Master Doctor, is for you altogether.
Caius. Ay, by gar, and de maid is love-a-me; my nurfh-a-Quickly tell me fo muth.
Hoft. What fay you to young Mr Fenton? he capers, he dances, he has eyes of youth, he writes verfes, he fpeaks holy-day t, he fmells April and
That is, His converfation inspires mirth and festivity, fuch as would become a holiday. Revifal.
May; he will carry't, he will carry't; 'tis in his buttons; he will carry't.
Page. Not by my confent, I promise you. The gentleman is of no having, he kept company with the wild Prince and Poins. He is of too high a region, he knows too much. No, he fhall not knit a knot in his fortunes with the finger of my fubstance. If he take her, let him take her fimply; the wealth I have waits on my confent, and my confent goes not that way.
Ford. I beseech you heartily, fome of you go home with me to dinner: befides your chear, you fhall have fport; I will fhow you a monster. Mr Doctor, you shall go; fo fhall you, Mr Page; and you, Sir Hugh
Shal. Well, fare you well, we fhall have the freer wooing at Mr Page's.
Caius. Go home, John Rugby, I come anon.
Hoft Farewell, my hearts; I will to my honest knight Falstaff, and drink Canary with him.
Ford. afide.] I think I fhall drink in Pipe-wine first with him: I'll make him dance. Will you go, Gentles?
All. Have with you, to fee this monster.
Changes to Ford's Houfe.
Enter Mrs Ford, Mrs Page, and Servants with a basket.
Mrs Ford. What, John !, what, Robert!
Mrs Ford. I warrant.
Mrs Page. Come, come, come.
Mrs Ford. Here fet it down.
-What, Robin, I fay.
Mrs Page. Give your men the charge, we must be brief.
Mrs Ford. Marry, as I told you before, John and Robert, be ready here hard by in the brewVOL. III.