bristle may enter, in way of thy excuse; my Lady will hang thee for thy abfence. Clo. Let her hang me; he that is well hang'd in this world, needs fear no colours. Mar. Make that good. Clo. He shall fee none to fear. Mar. A good lenten answer: I can tell thee where that faying was born, of, I fear no colours. Clo. Where, good mistress Mary? Mar. In the wars, and that may you be bold to say in your foolery. Clo. Well, God give them wisdom that have it; and thofe that are fools, let them use their talents. Mar. Yet you will be hang'd for being fo long absent, or be turn'd away; is not that as good as a hanging to you ? Clo. Marry, a good hanging prevents a bad marriage; and for turning away, let summer bear it out. Mar. You are refolute then? Clo. Not so neither, but I am resolv'd on two points. Mar. That if one break, the other will hold; or, if both break, your gaskins fall. Clo. Apt, in good faith; very apt: well, go thy way, if Sir Toby would leave drinking, thou wert as witty a piece of Eve's flesh as any in Illyria. Mar. Peace, you rogue, no more o' that; here comes my Lady; make your excufe wisely, you were beft. [Exit. Enter Olivia, and Malvolio. Clo. Wit, and't be thy will, put me into a good fooling! those wits, that think they have thee, do very oft prove fools; and I, that am fure I lack thee, 7 - lenten answer:-) A lean, or as we now call it, a dry anfwer.. may 1 1 may pass for a wife man. For what fays Quinapalus, Better be a witty fool than a foolish wit. God bless thee, Lady! Clo. Do you not hear, fellows? take away the Lady. Oli. Go to, y'are a dry fool; I'll no more of you; besides, you grow dishonest. Clo. Two faults, Madona, that drink and good counsel will amend; for give the dry fool drink, then is the fool not dry: Bid the dishonest man mend himfelf; if he mend, he is no longer dishonest; if he cannot, let the botcher mend him. Any thing, that's mended, is but patch'd; virtue, that transgresses, is but patch'd with fin; and fin, that amends, is but patch'd with virtue. If that this simple fyllogifm will serve, so; if it will not, what remedy? as there is no true cuckold but calamity, so beauty's a flower: the Lady bade take away the fool, therefore, I say again, take her away. Oli. Sir, I bade them take away you. Clo. Misprision in the highest degree. - Lady, иcullus non facit monachum; that's as much as to say, I wear not motley in my brain: good Madona, give me leave to prove you a fool. Oli. Can you do it? Clo. Dexteroufly, good Madona. Oli. Make your proof. Clo. I must catechize you for it, Madond; good my mouse of virtue, answer me. Oli. Well, Sir, for want of other idleness, I'll bide your proof. Clo. Good Madona, why mourn'st thou ? * Hall, in his Chronicle, fpeaking of the death of Sir Thomas More, fays, that he knows not whether to call him a foolish wife man, or a wife foolish man. Oli. I know his foul is in heav'n, foel. Clo. The more fool you, Madona, to mourn for your brother's soul being in heav'n: take away the fool, Gentlemen. Oli. What think you of this fool, Malvolio, dotli he not mend? Mal. Yes, and shall do, 'till the pangs of death shake him. Infirmity, that decays the wife, doth ever make better the fool. Clo. God fend you, Sir, a speedy infirmity, for the better increasing your folly! Sir Toby will be sworn, that I am no fox; but he will not pass his word for two pence, that you are no fool. Oli. How say you to that, Malvolio ? Mal. I marvel, your Ladyship takes delight in such a barren rascal; I saw him put down the other day with an ordinary fool, that has no more brain than a stone. Look you now, he's out of his guard already; unless you laugh and minister occasion to him, he is gagg'd. I proteft, I take these wife men, that crow so at these set kind of fools, no better than the fools' Zanies. Oli. O, you are fick of felf-love, Malvolio, and taste with a distemper'd appetite. To be generous, guiltless, and of free disposition, is to take those things for bird-bolts that you deem cannon-bullets: there is no slander in an allow'd fool, though he do nothing but rail; nor no railing in a known discreet man, though he do nothing but repove. Clo. Now Mercury indue thee with leasing, for thou speak'ft well of fools! • Now Mercury indue thee with LEASING, for thou speak'st well of fools!] This is a stupid blunder. We should read, with PLEASING, i. e. with eloquence, make thee a gracious and power Enter ful speaker, for Mercury was the God of orators as well as cheats. But the first Editors, who did not understand the phrafe, indue thee with pleasing, made this foolish correction; more excusable, however Enter Maria. Mar. Madam, there is at the gate a young Gentle man, much defires to speak with you. Oli. From the Count Orfino, is it? Mar. I know not, Madam, 'tis a fair young Man, and well attended. Oli. Who of my people hold him in delay? Oli, Fetch him off, I pray you, he speaks nothing but madman: fie on him! Go you, Malvolio; if it be a fuit from the Count, I am fick, or not at home: What you will, to dismiss it. [Exit Malvolio.] Now you fee, Sir, how your fooling grows old, and people diflike it. Clo. Thou hast spoke for us, Madona, as if thy eldeft Son should be a fool: whose scull Jove cram with brains, for here comes one of thy Kin has a most weak Pia Mater! SCENE VIII. Enter Sir Toby. Oli. By mine honour, half drunk. What is he at the gate, Uncle? Sir To. A Gentleman. Oli. A Gentleman? what Gentleman? Sir To. 'Tis a Gentleman here. - A plague ở these pickle herring! how now, fot? however, than the last Editor's, who, when this emendation was pointed out to him, would make one of his own; and so in his Oxford edition, reads, with LEARNING; without troubling himself to fatisfy the reader how the first editor should blunder in a word fo easy to be understood Clo. as learning, tho they well might in the word pleasing, as it is used in this place. WARBURTOΟΝ. I think the present reading more humourous. May Mercury teach thee to bye, fince thou liest in favour of fools. Tis a gentleman. HERE,-] He had before said it was a gentleman. Clo. Good Sir Toby, Oli. Uncle, Uncle, how have you come fo early by this lethargy? Sir To. Letchery! I defie letchery: there's one at the gate. Oli. Ay, marry, what is he? Sir To. Let him be the devil and he will, I care not: give me faith, say I. Well, it's all one. [Exit Oli. What's a drunken man like, fool? Clo. Like a drown'd man, a fool, and a madman: one draught above heat makes him a fool; the fecond mads him; and a third drowns him. Oli. Go thou and feek the Coroner, and let him fit o' my Uncle; for he's in the third degree of drink; he's drown'd; go look after him. Clo. He is but mad yet, Madona, and the fool shall look to the madman. [Exit Clown. Enter Malvolio. Mal. Madam, yond young Fellow swears he will speak with you. I told him, you were fick; he takes on him to understand so much, and therefore comes to speak with you: I told him you were asleep; he seems to have a fore-knowledge of that too, and therefore comes to speak with you. What is to be faid to him, Lady? he's fortified against any denial. Oli. Tell him, he shall not speak with me. Mal. He has been told fo; and he says, he'll stand at your door like a Sheriff's post, and be the fupporter to a bench, but he'll speak with you. tleman. He was asked what VOL. II. Oli. this was the appearance Viola made in mens clothes. See the character Malvolio draws of him presently after. WARBURTON. ftand at your door like a Sheriff's post, -) It was the custom for that officer to have вь large 2 |