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SCENE IV. Olivia's Garden for she incites me to that in the letter. Cast thy
humble slough, says she; be opposite with a kinsEnter Olivia and Maria
man, surly with servants,-lei thy tongue tang ON. I have sent after him: He says he'll come: with arguments of state, put thyself into the How shall I feast him ? wbat bestow on him? trick of singularity ;-and, consequently, sets For youth is bought more oft, than begg'd, or down the manner how; as, a sad face, a reveborrow'd.
rend carriage, a slow tongue, in the habit of some I speak too loud.
sir of note, and so forth. 1 have limed her ; but Where is Malvolio 7-he is sad, and civil, it is Jove's doing, and Jove make me thankful ! And suits well for a servant with my fortunes ;-And, when she went away now, Let this fellow Where is Malvolio 3
be looked to : Fellow! not Malvolio, nor after Mar. He's coming, madam; but in very strange my degree, but fellow. Why, every thing admanner. He is sure possessed, madam. heres together; that no dram of a scruple, no
Oli. Why, what's the matter ? does he rave ? scruple of a scruple, no obstacle, no incredulous Mar. No, madam, he does nothing but smile : or unsafe circumstance,-What can be said ? your lady ship were best to have some guard Nothing that can be, can come between me and about you, if he come ; for sure, the man is the full prospect of my hopes. Well, Jove, tainted in his wits.
not I, is the doer of this, and he is to be Oli. Go call him hither.-I'm as mad as he, thanked. If sad and merry madness equal be.
Re-enter Maria, with Sir Toby Belch and FaEnter Malvolio.
bian. How now, Malvolio?
Sir To. Which way is he, in the name of Mal. Sweet lady, ho, ho. [Smiles fantastically. sanctity? If all the devils in hell be drawn in Odz. Smil'st thou ?
little, and Legion himself possessed him, yet I sent for thee upon a sad occasion.
I'll speak to him.
Mar. Lo, how hollow the fiend speaks within
Mal. Ah, ha! does she so ?
Sir To. Go to, go to; peace, peace, we must mands shall be executed. I think, we do know deal gently with him ; let me alone. How do Ibe sweet Roman hand.
you, Malvolio ? how is't with you ? What, Oli. Wilt thou go to bed, Malvolio ?
man ! defy the devil; consider, he's an enemy Mal. To bed ? ay, sweet-heart; and I'll come to mankind. to thee.
Mal. Do you know what you say? Oli. God comfort thee! Why dost thou sinile Mar. La you, an you speak ill of the devil, 80, and kiss thy band so oft ?
how he takes it at heart! 'Pray God, he be not Mar. How do you, Malvolio?
Mar. Marry, and it shall be done to-morrow
tor more than I'll say,
Mar. O lord !
the way : Do you not see, you move him ; let Oli. Ha?
me alone with him.
Fab. No way but gentleness; gently, gently :
the fiend is rough, and will not be roughly used.
Sir To. Why, how now, my bawcock ? how them.
dost thou, chuck ?
Mal. Sir ?
'tis not for gravity to play at cherry-pit with Mal. And wished to see thee cross-gartered.
Satan : Hang him, foul collier !
Mar. Get him to say his prayers ; good Sir
Toby, get him to pray,
Mal. My prayers, minx ?
Mar. No, I warrant you, he will not hear of
Mal. Go, hang yourselves all! you are idle
shallow things: I am not of your element iyo Enter Servant. shall know more hereafter.
Sir To. Is't possible ? Ser. Madam, the young gentleman of the count Fab. If this were played upon a stage now, ! Orsino's is returned ; I could hardly entreat him could condemn it as an improbable fiction. back : he attends your lady ship's pleasure. Sir To. His very genius hath taken the infecOli. I'll come to him. [Erit Servant.) Good tion of the device, man. Maria, let this fellow be looked to. Where's my Mar. Nay, pursue him now : lest the device cousin Toby ? Let some of my people have a take air, and taint. special care of him ; I would not have him mis- Fab. Why, we shall make him mad, indeed. carry for the half of my dowry.
Mar. The house will be the quieter. [Ereunt Olivia and Maria. Sir To. Come, we'll have him in a dark room, Mal. Oh, ho! do you come near me now? no and bound. My niece is already in the belief worge man than Sir Toby to look to me? This that he is mad; we may carry it thus, for our concurs directly with the letter: she sends him pleasure, and his penance, till our very pastime, on purpose, ibai I may appear stubborn to him ;ltired out of breath, prompt us to have mercy on
him: at which time, we will bring the device, What shall you ask of me that I'll deny. to the bar, and crown thee for a finder of mad- Thai, honour sav'd, may upon asking give ? men. But see, but see.
Vio. Nothing but this, your true love for my Enter Sir Andrew Ague-cheek. Fab. More matter for a May morning.
Oli. How with mine honour may I give him
that Sir And. Here's the challenge, read it; I war-Which I have given to you
7 rant there's vinegar and pepper in't.
Vio. Fab. Is't so saucy ?
I will acquit you
Oli. Well, come again to-morrow: Fare thee Sir And. Ay, is it, I warrant him: do but read.
well; Sir To. Give me. (Reads.) Youth, whatso- A fiend, like thee, might bear my soul to hell. ever thou art, thou art but a scuroy fellow.
(Exit Fab. Good, and valiant Sir To. Wonder not, nor admire not in thy Re-enter Sir Toby Belch and Fabiau. mind, why I do call thee so, for I will show thee no reason for't.
Sir To. Gentleman, God save thee. Fab. A good note: that keeps you from the
Vio. And yon, sir. blow of the law.
Sir To. That defence thou hast, betake thee Sir To. Thou comest to the lady Olivia, and to't: of whai nature the wrongs are thou hast in my sight she uses thee kindly but thou liest don him, I know not; but thy intercepter, full in thy throat, that is not the matter I challenge of despight, bloody as the hunter, attends thee thee for.
at the orchard end: dismount thy luck, be yare Fab. Very brief, and exceeding good sense-less. in thy preparation, for thy assailant is quick, Sir To. I will waylay thee going home; where skilful, and deadly. if it be thy chance to kill me,
Vio. 'You mistake, sir; I am sure no man hath Fab. Good.
any quarrel to me'; my remembrance is very Sir To. Thou killest me like a rogue and a free and clear from any image of oftence done villain.
to any man. Fab. Still you keep o' the windy side of the therefore, if you hold your life at any price, be
Sir To. You'll find it otherwise, I assure you Jaw : Good. Sir To. Fare thee well : And God have mercy in him what youth, strength, skill, and wrath,
take you to your guard; for your opposite hath upon one of our souls ! He may have mercy upon mine;
but my hope is better, and so look can furnish man withal. to thyself. Thy friend, as thou usest him, and
Vio. I pray you, sir, what is he ? thy sworn enemy.--Andrew Ague-cheek.
Sir To. He is knight, dubbed with unhatched Sir To. If this letter move him not, his legs rapier; and on carpet consideration; but he is cannot: I'll give't him.
a devil in private brawl : souls and bodies hath Mar. You may have very fit occasion for't; he divorced three ; and his incensement at this he is now in some commerce with my lady, and moment is so implacable , that satisfaction can will by and by depart.
be none but by pangs of death and sepulchre: Sir To. Go, Sir Andrew : scout me for him at hob, nob, is his word; give't, or take't. the corner of the orchard, like a bum-bailiff:
Vio. I will return again into the house, and so soon as ever thou seest him, draw; and, as desire some conduct of the lady. I am no fighter. thou drawest, swear horrible : for it comes to
I have heard of some kind of men, that put onarpass oft, that a terrible oath, with a swaggering rels purposely on others, to taste their valour: accent sharply twanged off, gives manhood more belike, this is a man of that quirk. approbation than ever proof itself would have Sir To. Sir, no; his indignation derives itsel earned him. Away.
out of a very competent injury; therefore, get Sir And. Nay, let me alone for swearing.
you on, and give him his desire Back you shall
1 Exit. not to the house, unless you undertake that with Sir To. Now will not I deliver his letter for me, which with as much safety you might the behaviour of the young gentleman gives him answer him: therefore on, or strip your sword out to be of good capacity and breeding ; his stark naked : for meddle you must, that's ceremployment between his lord and my niece tain, or forswear to wear iron about you. confirins no less: therefore this letter, being so
Vio. This is as uncivil, as strange. beseech excellently ignorant, will breed no terror in the you, do me this courteous office, as to know of youth, he will find it comes from a clodpole. the knight what my offence to him is; it is someBut, sir, I will deliver his challenge hy word of thing of my negligence, nothing of my purpose. mouth ; 'set upon Ague-cheek a noiable report of Sir To I will do so. Signior Fabian, stay valour; and drive the gentleman (as I know his you by this gentleman till my return. youth will aptly receive it) into a most hideous
[Erit Sir Toby. opinion of his rage, skill, fury, and impetriosity.
Vio. 'Pray yon, sir, do you know of this mat
ter? This will so fright them both, that they will kill one another by the look, like cockatrices.
Fab. I know the knight is incensed against Enter Olivia and Viola.
you, even to a mortal arbitrement; but nothing
of the circumstance more. Fab. Here he comes with your niece: give Vio. I beseech you what manner of man is he? them way, till he take leave, and presently after Fab. Nothing of that wonderful promise, to him.
read him by his form, as you are like to find him Sir To. I will meditate the while upon some in the proof of his valour. He is indeed, sir, the horrid message for a challenge.
most skilful, bloody, and fatal opposite that you [Ereunt Sir Toby, Fabian, and Maria. could possibly have found in any part of Illyria: Oli. I have said too much unto a heart of stone, Will you walk towards him ? I will make your And laid my honour too unchary out:
peace with him, if I can. Tbere's something in me, that reproves my fault; Vio. I shall be much bound to you for't: I am But such a headstrong potent fault it is, one, that would rather go with sir priest, than That it but mocks reproof.
sir knight : I care not who knows so much of Vio. With the same 'haviour that your passion my metile.
[Exeunt. bears, Go on my master's griefs.
Re-enter Sir Toby, with Sir Andrew. Oli. Here,wear this jewel for me, 'tis my picture! Sir To. Why man, he's a very devil ; I have Refuse it not, it hath no tongue to vex you: not seen such a firago. I had a pass with him, And, I beseech you, come again to-morrow. rapier, scabbard, and all, and he gives me the
stockin, with such a mortal motion, that it is Ant. I must entreat of you some of that money,
Vio. What money, sir?
I'll lend you something: my having is not much;
Will you deny me now ? Let him let the matter slip, and I'll give him Is't possible, that my deserts to you my horse, gray Capilet.
Can lack persuasion ? Do not tempt my misery,
I know of none;
Nor know I you by voice, or any feature : Re-enter Fabian and Viola.
I hate ingratitude more in a man, have his horse [to Fab.) to take up the quar-Thanlying, vainness, babbling, drunkenness, rel; I have persuaded him, the youth's
a devil. Or any taint of vice, whose strong corruption Fab. He is as horribly conceited of him ; and Inhabits our frail blood. pants, and looks pale, as if a bear were at his 2 0ff. Come, sir, I pray you go
O heavens themselves ! heels. Sir To. There's no remedy, sir: he will fight Ani. Let me speak a little. This youth that with you for his oath's sake: marry, he hath
you see here,
1 of. What's that to us? The time goes by ; Aside.
away Fab. Give ground, if you see him furious.
Ant. But, o, how vile an idol proves this Sir 7'0. Come, Sir Andrew, there's no remedy; Thou hast, Sebastian, done good feature shame. the gentleman will, for his honour's sake, have in nature there's no blemish, but the mind; one bout with you; he cannot by the duello None can be call'd deform'd, but the unkind : avoid it: but he has promised me, as he is a Virtue is beauty; but the beauteous-evil gentleman and a soldier, he will not hurt you. Are empty trunks, o'erflourished by the devil. Come on ; to't. Sir And.' 'Pray God, he keep his oath!
1 off. The man grows mad; away with him. [Draws. Come, come, sir.
Ant. Lead me on. [Ereunt Officers with Ant. Enter Antonio.
Vio. Methinks, his words do from such pos Vio. I do assure you, 'tis against my will.
That he believes himself; so do not I
Prove true, imagination, 0, prove true,
Sir 7o. Come hither, knight ; come hither,
Fabian; we'll whisper' o'er a couple or two of
(Drawing. most sage saws. Sir To. Yon, sir ? why, what are you?
Vio. Ile named Sebastian ; I my brother know
In favour was my brother; and he went
For him I imitate: 0, if it prove,
[Dramos. Tempests are kind, and salt waves fresh in love! Enter Two Officers.
Sir To. A very dishonest paltry boy, and more Fab. O good Sir Toby, hold; here come the a coward than a hare: his dishonesty appears, officers.
in leaving his friend here in necessity, and deny. Sir To. I'll be with you anon. [70 Antonio. ing him; and for his cowardship, ask Fabian..
Vio. Pray, sir, put up your sword, if you Fab. A coward, a most devout coward, reliplease.
[To Sir Andrew. gious in it. Sir And Marry, will I sir ;-and, for that I Sir And. 'Slid, l'll after him again, and beat promised you, I'll be as good as my word: He him. will bear you easily; and reins well.
Sir To. Do, cut him soundly, but never draw I of. This is the man; do thy office.
thy sword. 2 off. Antonio, I arrest thee at the suit
Sir And. An I do not,
[Exit. Of count Orsino.
Fab. Come, let's see the event.
You do mistake me, sir. Sir To. I dare lay any money, 'twill be nothing 1 Of. No, sir, no jot: I know your favour well. yet.
[Exeun Though now you have no sea-cap on your head. Take him away; he knows, I know him well. Ant. I must obey.--This comes with seeking
ACT IV. you; Pat there's no remedy ; I shall answer it. SCENE 1. The Street before Olivia's House. What will you do? Now my necessity
Enter Sebastian and Clown. Makes me to ask you for my purse: it grieves me Much more, for what I cannot do for you, Clo. Will you make me believe that I am not Than what befalls myself. You stand amaz'd; sent for you? But be of comfort.
Seb. Go to, go to, thou art a foolish fellow; 2 Of. Come, sir, away.
Let me be clear of thee.
Clo. Well held out, i' faith! No, I do not know SCENE II. A Room in Olivia's House. you; nor I ain not sent to you by my lady, to
Enter Maria and Clown. bid you come speak with her; nor your name is not master Cesario; nor this is not my nose Mar. Nay, I pr'ythee, put on this gown, ana neither.-Nothing, that is so, is so.
this beard, make him believe, thou art Sir ToSeb. I pr’ythee, vent thy folly somewhere else; pas the curate ; do it quickly : I'll call Sir Toby Thou know'st not me.
(Erit Maria. Clo. Vent my folly! He has heard that word Clo. Well, I'll put it on, and I will dissemble of some great man, and now applies it to a fool. myself in't; and I would I were the first that Vent my folly! I am afraid this great lubber, ever dissembled in such a gown. I am not tall the world, will prove a cockney: -1 pr’ythee enough to become the function well; nor lean pow, ungird thy strangeness, and tell me what enough to be thought a good student: but to be I shall vent to my lady ; Shall I vent to her, said, an honest man, and a good housekeeper that thou art coming ?
goes as fairly as to say, a careful man, anda Seb. I pr’ythee, foolish Greek, depart from me: great scholar. The competitors enter. There's money for thee; if you tarry longer, I shall give worse payment.
Enter Sir Toby Belch and Maria. Clo. By my troth, thou hast an open hand :- Sir 7'o. Jove bless thee, master parson. These wise men that give fools money, get them- Clo. Bonos dies, Sir Toby: for as the old her melves a good report after fourteen years' pur- mit of Prague, that never saw pen and ink, very chase.
wittily said to a niece of king Gorboduc, Thai, Enter Sir Andrew, Sir Toby, and Fabian.
that is, is: so I, being master parson, am master
parson: For what is that, but that? and is, but is? Sir And. Now, sir, have I met you again ?
Sir To. To him, Sir Topas. there's for you.
(Striking Sebastian. Clo. What, hoa, I say ;-Peace in this prison ! Seb. Why, there's for thee, and there, and Sir To. The knave counterfeits well; a good there :
knave. Are all the people mad? (Beating Sir Andrew. Mal. [in an inner chamber.] Who calls there?
Sir To Hold, sir, or I'll throw your dagger Clo. Sir Topas the curate who comes to visit o'er the house.
Malvolio the lunatic. Clo. This will I tell my lady straight; I would Mal. Sir Topas, Sir Topas, good Sir Topas, not be in some of your coats for two-pence.
go to my lady
[Exit Clown Clo. Out, hyperbolical fiend! how vexest thou Sir To. Come on, sir; hold.
this man 1 talkest thou nothing but of ladies ? [Holding Sebastian.
Sir To. Well said, master parson. Sir And. Nay, let him alone ; I'll go another Mal. Sir Topas, never was man thus wronged; way to work with him; I'll have an action of good Sir Topas, do not think I am mad;
they battery against him, if there be any law in Illy have laid me here in hideous darkness. ria: though I struck him first, yet it's no matter Clo. Fie, thou dishonest Sathan! I call thee for that.
by the most modest terms; for I am one of those Seb. Let go thy hand.
gentle ones, that will use the devil himself with Sir To. Come, sir, I will not let you go. Come, courtesy : Say'st thou, that house is dark ? my young soldier, put up your iron: you are
Mal. As hell, Sir Topas. well feshed ; come on.
Clo. Why, it hath bay windows transparent as Seb. I will be free from thee. What would'st barricadoes, and the clear stories towards the thou now?
south-north are as lustrious as ebony ; and yet If thou dar'st tempt me further, draw thy sword. complainest thou of obstruction ?
Mal. I am not mad, Sir Topas: I say to you, Sir To. What, what! Nay, then I must have this house is dark. an ounce or two of this malapert blood from Clo. Madman, thou errest: 1 say, there is no you.
[Draws. darkness, but ignorance; in which thou art more Enter Olivia.
puzzled than the Egyptians in their fog.
Mal. I say, this house is as dark as ignorance, Oli. Hold, Toby ; on thy life, 1 charge thee, though ignorance were as dark as hell; and I hold.
say, there was never man thus abused: I am no Sir To. Madam!
more mad than you are; make the trial of it in Oli. Will it be ever thus ? Ungracious wretch, any constant question. Fit for the mountains and the barbarous caves,
Clo. What is the opinion of Pythagoras conWhere manners ne'er were preach'd l out of my cerning wild fowl ? sight!
Mal. That the soul of our grandam might Be not offended, dear Cesario :
haply inhabit a bird. Rudesby, begone -I pr'ythee, gentle friend, Clo. What thinkest thou of his opinion ?
Mal. I think nobly of the soul, and no way (Eseunt Sir Toby, Sir Andrew, and Fabian.
approve his opinion. Let thy fair wisdom, not thy passion, sway Clo. Fare thee well: Remain thou still in darkIn this uncivil and unjust extent
ness: thou shalt hold the opinion of PythagoAgainst thy peace. Go with me to my house ; ras, ere I will allow of thy wits: and fear to And hear thou there how many fruitless pranks kill a woodcock, lest thou dispossess the soul of This ruffian hath botch'd up, that thou thereby thy grandam. Fare thee well. May'st smile at this: thou shalt not choose but go; Mal. Sir Topas, Sir Topas, -. Do not deny: Beshrew his soul for me,
Sir To. My most exquisite Sir Topas ! He started one poor heart of mine in thee. Clo. Nay, I am for all waters. Seb. What relish is in this? how runs the Mar. Thou might'st have done this withou stream ?
thy beard and gown; he sees thee not. Or I am mad, or else this is a dream :
Sir. To. To him in thine own voice, and bring Let fancy still my sense in Lethe steep; me word how thom findest him ; I would, ve If it be thus to dream, still let me sleep
were well rid of this knavery. If he may be Oli Nay, come, 1 pr’ythee: 'Would, thou'dst conveniently delivered, I would he were ; for 1 be rul'd by me!
am now so far in offence with my niece, that I Seb. Madam, I will.
cannot pursue with any safety this sport to the Oli. O, say so, and so be!
upshot. Come by and by to my chamber. [Exeunt.
Exeunt Sir Toby and Maria
Clo. Hey Robin, jolly Robin,
Or else the lady's mad; yet, if 'twere so,
Take, and give back affairs, and their dispatch, Mal Fool,
With such a smooth, discreet, and stable bearing, Clo. Alas, why is she so ?
As, I perceive she does : there's something in't,
That is deceivable. But here comes the lady.
Enter Olivia and a Priest.
Oli. Blame not this haste of mine : if you mean
Now go with me, and with this holy man,
Into the chantry by: there, before him,
And underneath that consecrated roof,
. Fool, there was never man so notoriously May live at peace : He shall conceal it,
Oli. Then lead the way, good father :- And Clo. Advise you what you say: the minister heavens so shine, is bere, - Malvolio, Malvolio, thy wits the hea. That they may fairly note this act of mine! vens restore ! endeavour thyself to sleep, and
(Eseunt leave thy vain bibble babble. Mal. Sir Topas, Clo. Maintain no words with him, good fellow.
Enter Clown and Fabian.
Fab. Any thing:
Clo. Do not desire to see this letter.
Enter Duke, Viola, and Attendants. Clo. I will help you to't. But tell me trire, Duke. Belong you to the lady Olivia, friends ? are you not mad, indeed ? or do you but coun Clo. Ay, sir; we are some of her trappings. terfeit ?
Duke. I know thee well : How dost thou, my
Duke. Just the contrary; the better for thy
Clo. No, sir, the worse.
Duke. How can that be?
Clo. Marry, sir, they praise me, and make an ru be with you again,
ass of me; now my foes tell me plainly I am In a trice;
an ass : so that by my foes, sir, I profit in the Like to the old vice,
knowledge of myself; and by my friends I am Your need to sustain;
abused : so that, conclusions to be as kisses, if
your four negatives make your two affirmatives, Who with dagger of lath,
why, then the worse for my friends, and the In his rage and his wrath,
better for my foes.
Duke. Why, this is excellent.
Clo. By my troth, sir, po; though it please
you to be one of my friends.
Duke. Thou shalt not be the worse for me ; SCENE III. Olivia's Garden. there's gold.
Clo. But that it would be double dealing, sir,
I would you could make it another.
a double dealer; there's another.
I am here to speak with her, and bring her along And wrangle with my reason, that persuades me with you, it may awake my bounty further. To any other trust, but that I am mad,
Clo. Marry, sir, lullaby to your bounty, till ]