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Eh ! lorjus days, booath far an woide, lume of the Every Day Book, and de.
There's yard's o' books at every stroide, cribed in that work.*
Fro' top to bothum, cend an soide,

Sich plecks there's very few so:
Au axt him if they wurn for t’sell,
For Nan loikes readink vastly well,

January 14.
Boh th' measter wur ea wt, so he couldna tell,
Or au'd bowt hur Robinson Crusoe.

MALLARD DAY.
There's a trumpet speyks and maks a din, At All-Souls College, Oxford, there is
Ana shute o clooas made o tin,

annually on the evening of this day a great For folk to goo a feightink in,

merry-making, occasioned by a circumJust loike thoose cbaps o' Boney's : stance related in “Oxoniensis Academia, An there's a table carv'd so queer,

or the Antiquities and Curiosities of the Wi' os mony planks os days i'th' year, An crinkum crankums here an there,

University of Oxford, by the Rev. John Loike th' clooas press at mel gronney's.

Pointer," + who says,

“ Another custom is that of celebrating There's Oliver Crumill's bums an balls, their Mallard-night every year on the 14th An Frenchman's guns, they'd tean i' squalls, of January, in remembrance of a huge An Swords, os lunk os me, on th' walls, mallard or drake, found (as tradition goes) An bows an arrows too, mon :

imprisoned in a gutter or drain under Au didna moind his fearfo words, Nor skeletons o men an birds,

ground, and grown to a vast bigness, at Boh au fair hate seet o greyt lung swords

the digging for the foundation of the Col.

lege. Sin th' feyght at Peterloo, mon.

“ Now to account for the 'longevity of We seed a wooden cock loikewise,

this mallard, Mr. Willughby, in his OrBoh dang it, mon, theas college boys, nithology, tells us (p. 14, speaking of the They tell’n a pack o starink loies,

age of birds) that he was assured by a Os sure os teaw'r a sinner;

friend of his, a person of very good credit, That cock when it smells roast beef'll crow

that his father kept a goose known to be Says he ; boh, au said, teaw lies, au know, An au con prove it plainly so,

eighty years of age, and as yet sound and Au’ve a peawnd i' meh hat for meh dinner. lusty, and like enough to have lived many

years longer, had he not been forced to kill Boh th' hairy mon had missed meh thowt, her for her mischievousness, worrying and An th' clog fair crackt by thunner bowt,

destroying the young geese and goslings. An th' woman noather lawmt nor nowt, Thew ne'er seed th' loike sin t'ur born, mon.

“And my lord Bacon, in his Natural There's crocodiles, an things indeed

History, p. 286, says the goose may pass Au colours, mak, shap, size, an breed,

among the long livers, though his food be An if au moot tell ton hoave au seed

commonly grass and such kind of nourishWe moot sit an smook till morn, mon. ment, especially the wild-goose : where

upon this proverb grew among the Then dewn Lung-Mill-Gate we did steer To owd Moike Wilson's goods-shop there,

Germans: Magis senex quàm Ansernivalis

- older than a wild-goose. To bey cawr Nan a rockink chear, An pots, an spoons, an ladles :

“And, if a goose be such a long-lived Nan bowt a glass for lookink in,

bird, why not a duck or drake, since I A tin Dutch oon for cookink in,

reckon they may be both ranked in the Au bowt a cheer for smookink in,

same class, though of a different species as An Nan ax'd proice o'th'cradles.

to their size, as a rat and a mouse?

“ And, if so, this may help to give Then th' fiddler struck up th' honey-moon,

credit to our All-Souls mallard. HowAn off we seet for Owdham soon, We madc owd Grizzle trot to th' tune,

ever, this is certain, this mallard is the acEvery yard o'th' way, mon.

cidental occasion of a great gaudy once a At neet oich lad an bonny lass,

year, and great mirth, though the commeLaws heaw they donc'd an drunk their glass,

moration of their founder is the chief ocSo tiert wur Nan an 1, by th' mass,

casion. For on this occasion is always Ot we lay till twelve next day, mon. sung a merry old song."

It should not be forgotten that in collection at the college there are two clog- Whitaker. Aikin. Manchester Guide. almanacs, similar to that which is engra- Oratorical Guide, &c. ven as a frontispiece to the second vo.

+ London, 1749, 8vo.

to say

This notice caused “A complete Vin- schwoppinge mallarde imprisoned in the dication of the Mallard of All-Souls Col- sinke or sewere, wele yfattened and allege, against the injurious suggestions of most y bosten. Sure token of the thrivthe Rev. Mr. Pointer;" a publica- aunce of his future college. tion by a pleasant writer, who, with mock “Moche doubteth he when he awoke gravity, contends that the illustrious mal- on the nature of this vision, whethyr he lard had, through a “forged hypothesis," mote give bede thereto or not. Then adbeen degraded into a goose. To set this visyth he there with monie docters and important affair in a true light, he proceeds learnyd clerkys, who all seyde howe he

oughte to maken trial upon it. Then “I shall beg leave to transcribe a comyth he to Oxenforde, and on a daye passage from Thomas Walsingham, a fixed, after masse seyde, proceedeth he monk of St. Alban's, and regius professor in solemnee wyse, with spades and pickof history in that monastery about the axes for the nonce provided, to the place year 1440. This writer is well known afore spoken of. But long they had not among the historians for his Historia digged ere they herde, as it myghte seme, Brevis, written in Latin, and published within the wam of the erthe, horrid strugboth by Camden and archbishop Parker: glinges and Autteringes, and anon violent but the tract I am quoting is in English, quaakinges of the distressyd mallarde. and entitled, “Of wonderful and surprising Then Chichele lyfteth up his hondes and Eventys,' and, as far as I can find, has seyth Benedicité, &c. &c. Nowe when never yet been printed. The eighth they broughte him forth, behold the size chapter of his fifth book begins thus :- of his bodie was as that of a bustarde or

Ryghte wele worthie of note is an ostridge. And moche wonder was thilke famous tale of the All-Soulen Mal- thereat; for the lycke had not been seene larde, the whiche, because it bin acted in in this londe, ne in onie odir.”” our daies, and of a suretye vouched unto Upon this historical proof” the vindi. me, I will in fewe wordy's relate.

cator rests the verity of the venerable “"Whenas Henrye Chichele, the late mallard, and goes on to prove that “Mr. renowned archbishope of Cantorberye, Pointer, by taking the longevity of the malhad minded to founden a collidge in Oxs lard for granted, hath endeavoured to esenforde, for the hele of his soule and the tablish thereon the hypothesis of the goose soules of all those who peryshed in the in opposition to all truth and testimony, warres of Fraunce, fighteing raliantlye both historical and prophetical.” The vinunder our most gracious Blenrye the dicator further affirms that he is greatly fifthe, moche was he distraughten con- surprised to find "an orthodox clergyman, cerning the place he myghte choose for like Mr. Pointer, abetting errors, and thilke purpose.

Him thinkyth some proposing (though obscurely) dangerous whylest how he myghte place it withouten innovations.". For, he enquires, “would the eastern porte of the citie, both for the any one but this author have represented pleasauntnesse of the meadowes and the so august a ceremony, as the celebration of clere streamys therebye runninge. Agen the mallard, by those vulgar circumstances bim thinkyth odir whylest howe he mote of eating and drinking, and singing a builden it on the northe side for the merry old song ? ?" heleful ayre there coming from the fieldes. However, to conclude all that can be Nowe while he doubteth thereon he dremt, reasonably said of this commemoration and behold there appereth unto him one and its origin, and, because this “ merry of righte godelye personage, sayinge and old song” hath not been given by either adviseing as howe he myghte placen his the alleged asperser or the espouser of collidge in the highe strete of the citie, the bird of All-Souls, the ballad is exnere unto the chirche of our blessed ladie tracted and printed below, from a collecthe Virgine, and in witnesse that it was tion well known to Oxonians. It must sowthe, and no vain and deceitful phan- not however be forgotten that the reverend tasie, wolled him to laye the first stane of author of “A Companion to the Guide, the foundation at the corner which turneth and a Guide to the Companion," which towards the Cattys-Strete, where in del- purports to be “A complete supplement vinge he myghte" of a suretye finde a to all the accounts of Oxford hitherto

published," says, in his preface, “that the

Reverend Mr. Pointer, rector of Slapton 3rd Edition, Oxford, 1793, 8vo. in Northamptonshire, was but little ac

quainted with our academical annals, is Country-woman's dress in queen Elizabeth's evident, from his supposing the mallard

days. of All-Souls College to be a goose." The picture which Dunbar, in “The THE MERRY OLD SONG OF THE ALL

Freirs of Berwick," has given us of the Soul's MALLARD.

dress of a rich farmer's wife in Scotland, Grifin, bustard, turkey, capon,

during the middle of the sixteenth century, Let other hungry mortals gape on;

will apply, with little difference, to the And on the bones their stomach fall hard,

still wealthier dames of England. He But let All-Souls' men have their MALLARD.

has drawn her in a robe of fine scarlet Oh! by the blood of King Edward,

with a white hood; a gay purse and Oh! by the blood of King Edward, gingling keys pendant at her side from a

It was a swapping, swapping MALLARD. silked belt of silver tissue; on each finger The Romans once admired a gander

she wore two rings, and round her waist More than they did their chief commander; was a sash of grass-green silk, richiy emBecause he sav'd, if some don't fool us,

broidered with silver. The place that's called th' head of Tolus. To this rural extravagance in dress,

Oh! by the blood, &c. Warner, in “ Albion's England,” bears The poets feign Jove turned a swan,

equal testimony, through two old gossips But let them prove it if they can ;

cowering over their cottage-fire, and As for our proof 'tis not at all hard,

chatting how the world had changed “in For it was a swapping, swapping MALLARD. their time.”

Oh! by the blood, &c. Therefore let us sing and dance a galliard,

When we were maids (quoth one of them) To the remembrance of the MALLARD :

Was no such new-found pride : And as the MALLARD dives in pool,

Then wore they shoes of ease, now of
Let us dabble, dive, and duck in bowl.

An inch-broad, corked high.
Oh! by the blood of King Edward,

Black kersey stockings, worsted now,
Oh! by the blood of King Edward,

Yea silk of youthful'st dye :
It was a swapping, swapping MALLARD.

Garters of list, but now of silk,

Some edged deep with gold :

With costlier toys for coarser turns h. m.

Than used perhaps of old.
January 14.-Day breaks 5 51

Fringed and embroidered petticoats
Sun rises

7 53 Now beg. But heard you named,
sets

4 7 Till now of late, busks, perriwigs, Twilight ends 6 8 Masks, plumes of feathers framed. Fieldfares remain very numerous. Supporters, posturs, farthingales,

Above the loins to wear;

That be she ne'er so slender, yet,
January 15.

She cross-like seems four-square. Queen Elizabeth was crowned at West- Some wives, gray-headed, shamc not locks minster on the 15th of January 1559, by Of youthful borrowed hair : the bishop of Carlisle, who was the only Some, tyring art, attire their heads

With only tresses bare : prelate that could be prevailed upon to perform the ceremony.

She was con

Some (grosscr pride than which, think I,

No passed age might shame) ducted through London amidst the joyful

By art, abusing nature, heads acclamations of the people. In the course of the procession, a boy, who personated Once starching lack't the term, because

Of antick't hair do frame. Truth, descending from a triumphal arch,

Was lacking once the toy, presented to her a bible, which she re

And lack't we all these toys and terms, ceived with gracious deportment, and

It were no grief, but joy.placed in her bosom; declaring that it was by far more precious and acceptable Now dwells

each drossel in her glass ·

When I was young, I wot than all the costly testimonies which the

On holy-days (for seldom else city had that day given her of their attach

Such idle times we got) ment. She acquired a popularity beyond A tub or pail of water clear what any of her predecessors or suc- Stood us instead of glass.* cessors could attain.

Dr. Drake's Shakspeare and his Times, • Hume.

i. 118,

b. m.

addressed to the Morning Advertiser, loy January 15.-Day breaks 5 50

the proprietor of the theatre, disavowing Sun rises

7 52 connivance with the impostor, and stating - sets

4 8 that, as Twilight ends 6 10 “The performance proposed was so Birds seek the shelter, food, and pro- very extraordinary, it was stipulated with tection of the house.

the person that hired the house that there The weather usually very

hard.

should be a receiver of the proprietor's own appointment at the office, and, in

case there should be no performance, or January 16.

any notorious equivocation, that the

money should be returned. All which BOTTLE CONJUROR.

was assented to, and, as the hirer paid On Monday, the 16th of January, 1749, the rent, and would necessarily be at it was announced by newspaper adver- other expenses before the opening of the tisement that a person, on that evening, at doors,” the proprietor says, -, the Theatre Royal, in the Haymarket, “I was thereby strongly induced to bewould play on a common walking cane lieve that he intended no real imposition, the music of every instrument then in but that something (of that kind) would use ; that he would, on the stage, get into be exhibited to the satisfaction of the a tavern quart botile, without equivoca- spectators. All the caution above mention, and, while there, sing several songs, tioned was taken, and the money locked and suffer any spectator to handle the up in the office, guarded by persons of bottle; that if any spectator came masked reputation, who would have returned it; he would, it requested, declare who they and publicly, on the stage, told them that were; that, in a private room, he would if the person did not appear their money produce the representation of any person should be returned. But, instead of comdead, with whom the party requesting it plying with that offer, my house was should converse some minutes, as if alive; pulled down, the office broken open, the that the performance would begin at half- money taken out, and the servants obliged past six; and that a guard would be to fly to save their lives. I hope, thereplaced at the doors to preserve order. fore, this may be deemed a sufficient

This advertisement assembled an im- justification in my behalf, and all that mense audience, who waited till seven could be reasonably expected from me; o'clock, and then, becoming impatient and that those gentlemen who are conscious and vociferous, a person came before the of having injured me will be so generous curtain, and declared that, if the performer as to make me a reasonable satisfaction, did not appear, the money should be considering the damage I have suffered, returned. Afterwards, a voice behind the which, on a moderate computation, will curtain cried out that the performer exceed four hundred pounds. had not arrived, but, if the audience

« John Potter." would stay till the next evening, instead On the same day there appeared in the of going into a quart bottle, he would get

same paper an advertisement from Mr. into a pint. A tumult then commenced, Foote, the comedian, whence it appears by the throwing of a lighted candle from that he had been accused of having been one of the boxes upon the stage. The accessory to the cheat. This, Foote interior of the theatre was torn down and utterly denied, and alleged that on the burnt in the street, and a flag made of morning of the expected performance he the stage curtain was placed on a pole, in called on Mr. Lewis, Potter's attorney, the midst of the bonfire. During the riot, and gave him his opinion that a fraud on the entrance money, which had been the public was intended, and therefore secured in a box, according to contract advised that the doors should not be with the proprietor of the house, was opened. Lewis's answer was, that if the carried away. Several persons of high man complied with his agreement, the rank were present, and the pick pockets doors must be opened. Foote then reobtained a rich booty. A distinguished commended him not to suffer, on any general's rich sword was lost, for the pretence, the man, or any of his confedesecovery of which thirty guineas were rates, to receive a shilling, but appoint a uffered.

treasurer, in order, if disappointment On Wednesday, the 18th, a letter was occurred, the money might be returned.

Potter's letter re-appeared in Thursday's

January 18. paper, with this “ N. B. The person who took the house was a man of genteel

Samuel Bernard, one of the richest and appearance; said his name was William

most celebrated financiers of Europe, died Nicholls; and directed letters to be left

in Paris, the 18th of January 1739, at the for him at the Bedford Coffee-house, Co- age of eighty-eight. He was an elder of vent Garden."

the Protestant church of Charenton. By The secret history of the imposture was

rendering great services to the court, he never discovered to the public, but it was

gained immense sums, and was created rumored that the affair originated in a

count of Coubert and a knight of St. wager proposed by a well-known rakish

Michel. His funeral procession equalled nobleman, which had been accepted, and, that of a prince in point of magnificence, to win the bet, he contrived and effected and in the train of distinguished attendants. the mischievous trick.

Bernard was a man of pleasantry. In

his expiring moments, Languet, the rector Within a week from the affair of the of St. Sulpice, who was indefatigable in bottle conjuror, an advertisement pro- his church, exported the dying, man to

obtaining subscriptions for the building of posed to rival his astonishing, non-performance, by stating that there had lately contribute to the structure; " for," said he, arrived from Ethiopia “ the most won

“ what do not they merit who are able to derful and surprising Doctor Benimbo participate in the edification of the temple Zimmampaango, dentist and body-surgeon

of the Lord ?" Bernard, endeavouring to the emperor of Monæmongi,” who,

10 turn his head to the rector, said, among other surprising operations, pro

“Hold up your hand, sir, or I shall see posed to perform the following: "He your cards. offers any one of the spectators, only to pull out his own eyes, which, as soon as

The rector Languet was an excellent he has done, the doctor will show them parish priest, and incessantly devoted to to any lady or gentleman then present, to

the rebuilding of his church, for which convince them there is no cheat, and then

purpose he turned every thing into money, replace them in the sockets as perfect and

and solicited subscriptions in all quarters. entire as ever."

The Jansenists were jealous of his endea

vours and his success. On paying his duty h. m.

to the archbishop of Paris, when that January 16.—Day breaks 5 49 prelate took possession of the archbishopSun rises

7 51 ric, the rector was surprised to find that 4 9

he had been accused of having carried on Twilight ends 6 11 trade, for which the archbishop severely The dead nettle, or red archangel, reproved him. Languet denied the flowers, if the weather be mild. Like charge. “Do not you sell ice ?" said the grounsel, it flowers nearly all the year.

Bishop. “Yes, my Lord : when the

workmen I employ in building my church January 17.

cannot work, in frosty weather, I make

them break and pile up the ice, which I A Big Bottle. In January, 1751, a globular bottle these hard times.” “Oh," said the prelate,

sell to furnish them with subsistence in was blown at Leith, capable of holding “I don't understand it in that manner, and two bogsheads. Its dimensions were forty inches by forty-two. This immense as I should,” said the good rector, “ if

you sell a great deal, I find.” “Not so much vessel was the largest ever produced at

the Jansenists had not spread a report that any glass work.

my ice was warm.

.

.

sets

h. m.

.

.

h. m. January 18.—Day breaks 5 47 Sun rises

7 58 sets

4 13 Twilight ends 6 13 The four-toothed moss flowers.

.

January 17.-Day breaks 5 48
Sun rises.

7 50
sets

4 10 Twilight ends. 6 12 The garden anemone, or windflower, flowers. It is the red variety which blows thus early. The usual season for the other sorts is April and May.

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Polyanthea, ii. 379.

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