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“ When first my youthful intellects were running all to waste,
Some dæmon whisper’d, (hang him for't,)

66 *******, have a taste !"
So I got a taste for politics, and to secure the pelf,
As I knew the world loved prodigies, I wrote upon myself.

With my flocci, nauci, &c.

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But, alas ! the reading public have neither sense nor taste,
For they let my youthful intellect, like poppies, run to waste;
And though I wrote by day and night, (forgive me while I weep,)
And never slept a wink myself,-my readers fell asleep.

With my flocci, nauci, &c.
Then I march'd up to my publisher in Paternoster-Row,
As Goldsmith says, ' remote, unfriended, melancholy, slow ;'
And slow, indeed, my volume sold,-more slow, alas! than sure,
And hinted, if I wrote for cash, I always should be poor.

With my flocci, nauci, &c.
“ In a rage, then, from the public I demanded restitution,
And humbugg'd them most nobly at the Surrey Institution ;
I talk'd of poems, tales, and plays, for one delicious season,
But my lectures, like the Cockney Odes, had neither rhyme nor reason.

With my flocci, nauci, &c.
My next book turn'd on politics, so constant and so true,
But was gather'd to its fathers by the Quarterly Review.
Old Gifford roar'd in thunder, like a lion in his lair,
And placed me in his pillory, egad! and fixed me there.

With my flocci, nauci, &c.
“ Then loud the laugh against me turn'd, and deeper, deeper still,'
While the stupid savage grinn'd at such an instance of his skill ;
He shew'd me as a specimen, in terms of low abuse,
A kind of winged animal—a genus of the goose.

With my flocci, nauci, &c.
“ But I lash'd him for his impudence and gross vituperation,
And call’d him (was I right, my friend ?) a torment to the nation ;'
And the public took my work so well, they came to me for more,
And like the pit at Drury-Lane, they bawl'd aloud, ‘Encore !

With my flocci, nauci, &c.
« Then curse, for aye, the Edinburgh and Quarterly Reviews,
One fill'd my head with flattery, the other with abuse,
One call’d me an ingenious hack, the other answer'd • Nay;'
And to my sorrow be it said, the Nays' have got the day.

With my flocci, nauci, &c.
“ But now, with Mr ******** leave, I'll end

my
comic

song,
And like young Rapid in the play, I'll • damme, push along.
So here's a toast for all to drink, 'twill cheer the festive scene,
And give a zest to merriment, 'tis-— ********

Magazine.

With my flocci, nauci, &c.
It reminds me of that image which no modern can surpass,
For its skull is made of lead, and its face is made of brass ;
And its head, like a fine Alderman of blessed name, is · Wood,'
And its sense, by Syntax privilege, is sometimes understood.

With my flocci, nauci," &c.

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To be sure, these Cockneys are in- . life they have left to the incredibility corrigible fellows; they owe the little of their impudence. As no one reads them, no one can believe them guilty ted to an intimacy with him. This is of the crying sins of impudence impu- a Cockney's idea of Childe Harold. ted to them. Seven-eighths of the Now, the fact is, Leigh is most reading public, I'm confident, do not horribly annoyed at not being either credit Leigh Hunt of the Examiner's praised or abused in Don Juan; as having the effrontery to preface a the Queen's will says of Alderman pamphletof his with dear Byron'—but Wood, it knows so such person exthat's nothing. In his sketch of By- tant. We must allow this to be very ron, signed with his own , in a late mortifying to a great man; but then number of his paper, he speaks thus how mean thus to half-beg, half-proof his lordship :

voke mention. I hope, however, his “ For the drama, whatever good Satannic Majesty will not stoop to passages such a writer will always put know his Cockannic brother, nor exforth, we hold that he has no more tend his vituperative laurel, with qualifications than we have.*

which he has crowned the first names What a we for his Cockannic Mam of the age, to one, who may, perhaps, jesty. He proceeds to state the cause merit the name of friend from him, of his friend Byron's affectation of re- but who, without a pretence, has the serve and seclusion: he speaks from impudence to aspire to the superior personal knowledge, that it is all owing honour of being his foe. “ I'm tired.” to his lordship’s being such a ninny- Mr North, believe me, your faithful hammer and a nonentity, that he gossip, could not help being swayed and lorda ALEXANDER SYDNEY TROTT. ed over by any one, whom he admit- August 25.

* We purpose taking notice some day next week of the only dramatic sketch Leigh ever published. 'Tis in his Indicator ; and such nonsense, Good Heavens !

MR SNAPFLINT's visIT TO THE MINISTER OF GLENLONELY-TROUT, DURING

THE SHOOTING SEASON.

Having agreed with my friend, Mr shot, but still made good use of her reSnapflint, to accompany him in a walk maining eye. When walking, I disup into the moors, through which he like conversation, and rather wish to meant to shoot, in going to visit the be permitted to fall into a lethargy of minister of Glenlonely-trout, we rose mind, submitting entirely to the inearly enough to breakfast at eight fluences of nature and of the atmoo'clock. In the country I neither shoot sphere. Therefore, little conversation nor do any thing else but only walk, passed between us; and we soon got eat, breathe, and lead a contemplative off the public road, into the moors, life. Therefore, while my friend Mr following here and there the track of Snapflint was engaged below, in getting carts. out his dog from the barn, and prepa- The aspect of moorland grounds ring his gun, I looked out from the pleases the mind in a certain way, by window to judge of the weather. The not presenting particular objects to wind was sweeping over an undulating draw the attention or disturb the field of corn, and bearing, across it, mind's equilibrium. One ascent of the broken shadows of a few light heather stretches away behind another; clouds; but these were no more than and the atmosphere shifts and changes a transient interruption of the sun- its clouds impartially over them all. shine. Mrs Snapflint, who was in the The wind of marshy moors has a kind room, observing this, said, we should of rankness which subdues the mind have a pleasant walk, and began to fill to the spirit of the place. The soil out the tea. Our breakfast consisted breathes forth its sad sentiments, and of eggs, beef-ham, and toasted bread, we feel them through our nostrils. for they were not near enough any The water, also, in any little brook, town to get rolls.

shews by its brownness, that it was When our breakfast was over, we forced to receive the flavour of the went to take the road, accompanied by moss. This flavour has no charms for Flora, a one-eyed pointer, who, on me, for it speaks of some of the dampsome occasion, had suffered from smalle est, and saddest of nature's stuff; a

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flavour, however, which many a one nations; and, if he had died on the likes in peat-reek whiskey: Moors banks of the Ganges, he would, accordcherish and retain a peculiar atmo- ing to Voltaire's notion, without any sphere of their own, which is never reluctance, have died with a cow's tail altogether dispersed and conquered by in his hand; but not with an intenthe power of the sun.

tion to mock at religion, by mimicking The inhabitants of such places seem the forms of superstition; for Maca to like best whatever is well seasoned queen was no infidel. with their own air ; and they look up- While these thoughts were passing on strangers, without pleasure at the through my mind, the rain had diminovelty of the sight, but rather view nished, and a little child came peeping them as intruders, breaking in upon to the door, saying, “Eh, des a man. the common tenor of their thoughts. Presently a woman, with a weatherWe saw a little girl sitting on a hill- beaten countenance, looked in, and ock tending cattle, and wrapping round said, “Weel, freends, what are ye herself a piece of old blanket to de- about here?” We told her that we fend her from the wind and rain. had come there only for shelter, and

Mr Snapflint made many a long cire she asked us into the house. After cuit with his dog, while i continued some hints from us about eating, she walking forward towards such points produced from a black pot that hung as he, from time to time, directed me. over the fire, some trouts that had been We saw that there was a shower co- frying in the bottom of it. These, ming on, and we turned our course with some hot potatoes, served to allay to a cottage that was within sight. I our hunger in the meantime; and was glad at the thought of going in though she rejected our offered money there awhile; for, on elevated

grounds good

naturedly with a violent bounce, the perpetual sounding of the blast in we put it into the hands of the little one's ears overpowers the senses. On child. Mr Snapflint did not leave any going down into a small hollow where of the game at the house, for the mos the house stood, I felt as if an im- ney was better to them, and he meant mense orchestra had suddenly stopped, to make another use of his moorfowl. so great was the change to compara- We therefore returned to our walk. tive silence and tranquillity.

Ascending still farther up the heights, We knocked at the door of the house, we separated for a while, Mr Snapflint but it was fastened, and there seemed shaping his course round the borders to be no person within. In the mean- of a wet place, and I pursuing my way time, down came the plump of rain, along the side of a hill, and sometimes ringing upon an unscraped porridge- taking a rest on large grey pieces of pot, that stood against the wall, and rock, that shot up through the soil. lashing heartily, with might and main, I saw the sportsman at a distance upon a large dunghill, till the water occasionally sending forth from his came leaping from off it in every di- gun puffs of smoke, which hung in rection. We therefore went into a the air for a moment and then disbyre which was open, and found there appeared. a single cow, ruminating over some cut When we had walked a while, Mr grass.

Snapflint beckoned to me to come to the Being by this time a good deal fac point of an eminence, from whence he tigued, I sat down on a wheel-barrow, shewed me the minister's house, about very well pleased, for the breath of a mile off. I saw that his game-bag cows fills with wholesome odour the was not empty. We agreed that he place where they are; and, Lord Jus- should desist from using his gun any tice-Clerk Macqueen, in a law-plea more, and proceed straight on, for it concerning a byre which was complain- was now near dinner-time. The couned of as a nuisance in a country town, try before us sloped down towards a said on the bench, to the other judges, more cultivated region, in which was “ Od, I like the smell of cow-dung situated the manse of Glenlonely-trout, very weel mysel.” This remark shew- beside a small valley. ed the sagacity of his lordship’s nos- We soon reached the road that led trils, which acknowledged due respect to the house. It was a path overhung for an animal that has been the object with plum-trees, which had dropped, of idolatry among so many different here and there, some of their purple

coloured fruit among the grass. On cock and a snipe stood on a side table; approaching to the house, we saw Mr and a wasp's byke was hung at one of Gilmourton himself, going in at his the windows. There were also some barn-door, carrying a sheaf of bar- curious pease, a potatoe of a wondere ley under each arm, for he was getting ful shape, and an uncommonly long in a small crop from a neighbouring stalk of corn. Over the fire-place, Mr field, and some other of his people fol- Gilmourton had fixed a print, reprelowed bearing as many sheaves as they senting a sederunt of the fifteen Lords could, each in the manner that he of Session, in their places, on the found easiest for his sinews. Mr Gil- bench, all portraits. This was an obmourton, though in an old suit of ject of great interest to him, who lived clothes, was dressed clerically to a cere far from Edinburgh, and who, at the tain extent, that is to say, he was in a same time, wished to know what was black coat, a black waistcoat, and black going on in the courts of law, and every breeches, but from these there was a change that occurred there. When harsh transition to white worsted stock- he heard of the death of any of the ings. He was not long in depositing Lords, he was very curious to ashis sheaves, and coming to meet us, certain who should come into his shewing that he was glad to see either place; and, to assist his

memory,

he strangers or friends.

generally marked off the portrait of His wife and he lived on their glebe the deceased judge with a stroke of in great ease, for they had no children. a lead pencil. As Mr Gilmourton was deficient in ta. He then mentioned a butcher, one lents for the pulpit, and rather dilatory of the inhabitants of a neighbouring in making up his sermons, he rejoiced town, who had been unfortunate, and when any young clergyman came to who had gone to Edinburgh to get a visit him on a Saturday, and staid to general discharge of his debts, after preach next day. And he told us there surrendering all his property. “It was one, at that time, up stairs with was as well for me," said Mr Gilmour. his wife. “On Wednesday last,” said ton, “ that he did not buy the twelve Mr Gilmourton," she entered her six- rows of potatoes which he bid for at tieth year, and she is as stout and hale my roup last harvest.” Mr Glebersas ever; and I'm not at all ailing my- mouth asked, " What would you self. Its a lang while, Mr Snapflint, have got for them?”—“ De’il a stisince I hae gotten fou; but I hae seen ver!" replied Mr Gilmourton, sweepthe day

Here his wife cried out ing his hand along a table.-—“ De'il a from an upper window, “ Toot, ye hae stiver !" repeated Mrs Gilmourton; seen the day, and ye hae seen the day“What's the man saying? We shouldWouldna it be better, instead of stand- na hear that frae you.

She was aling clavering there, to bring up the twa ways cutting her husband short, not gentlemen to get something after their from ill nature, but from a desire to walk ? How are you, Mr Snapflint? keep him right in his sayings ; and You're welcome here. A sight o' you this last observation of her's raised a is gude for sair een.”. Accordingly, loud laugh from the jocular Mr Snaphaving been led up to the parlour, we flint and me, at the minister's exfound Mrs Gilmourton sitting on one pence. side of the fire-place, and on the other As our hostess began to question Mr the clergyman, a serious youth, with Snapflint minutely about his wife and a large greasy round face, by name Mr children, I took that opportunity of Glebersmouth, He was examining walking out alone, to observe the situsome pieces of petrified moss, which ation of the place. I went down into he took from the chimney-piece; but Glenlonely-trout, which was a small he did not seem likely to take a bite valley, with some natural wood in it; of them, for his lips had a buttery but the rivulet in the middle was often softness that was evidently waiting for shewn quite uncovered. The sun shone dinner-time.

straight through its pellucid waters In the meantime, we got some cur- upon the gravelly bottom, so that, if rant wine, as being the fittest thing any trouts had been stirring, they for the forenoon. Looking round the might have been seen at a considerminister's dwelling, I found it was a able distance. The rocks here and snug and comfortable place, though the there sent forth clumps of hazel ; the ornaments were few. A stuffed blackbramble also spreading out its thorny

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arms, with their black and shining sation was passing, the servant-maid, fruit, was intermingled with the long who has been already mentioned, was broom, whose dry pods were heard struggling with a bottle of porter becracking and opening of their own ac- tween her knees, and Mr Gilmourton, cord, under the heat. The humming seeing that the cork resisted all her of insects pervaded the air, and where- strength, desired her to give it to Mr ever the soil was without verdure, it Glebersmouth, and let him try to draw appeared baked and yellow. But where it. He accordingly did so, and sucthere was grass, the wild bee was seen ceeded; but the bottle had been placed clambering heavily upon some solitary near the fire, and when it was opened, head of small white clover. It is in went off like a cannon. There being no places like these that the local inspi- vessel ready on the table, Mr Glebersration of Scottish poetry seems to work, mouth rose to give it to the servantand mother Earth there assails and im- maid, and drove her, covered with portunes the heart for some acknow- suds and froth, from the room. Only ledgment of natural affection. I would a small quantity was left for us to not willingly long submit to such in- drink; and, as Mr Gilmourton liked fluences ; but, while one must yield allusions to the law, I could not help a little to them on the spot, I thought saying, this was like a Cessio Bonorum, of the poet Burns, as a person educa- after prodigality, and that we, like ted entirely under the spell

. The spi- the creditors, must be contented with rit of such places took him up, and ani- what remained unspent. mated him; and this, mingled with Mr Gilmourton then called for a the passion of love, filled him with poe- dram, which, he said, he liked al

tical feeling. For awhile he was en- ways to see after dinner. Three kinds : tranced with kissings among the scents were produced, gin, brandy, and Highted birches; but, at last, the whole land whisky, besides a smoother li

ended in bad whisky. Such, I thought, queur, which had been composed by are the ways of the world. And then Mrs Gilmourton for her female visitors. returning along the same path by There being no ladies present, she which I had descended, I saw, at a wished me to taste the sweet dram. distance, a person beckoning to me, “ Na, na," said Mr Gilmourton, “gie

and found it was a summons to come him the gin.”-"Toot, gie him a fidi in to dinner.

dlestick," replied Mrs Gilmourton; On reaching the door, another “mind your ain end oʻthe table, and huge, red-haired servant lass appeared, let him judge for himsel." panting with haste; for she had been After dinner, Mr Snapflint asked,

seeking me over the fields in an op- what was the reason that the Laird | posite direction. And when I came of * * * * * * was cutting down

again into the parlour, Mr Gilmourton the fir planting that used to shelter said, “ You are lucky to have arrived his parks? Mr Gilmourton answerin gude time.” Dinner was soon placed ed, that the laird had many pecunion the table, and we drew round. Mrs ary claimants to satisfy, and that he Gilmourton said, “Wheesht ! Maister was glad, in the first place, to resort Glebersmouth is gunta gie us a grace. to any expedient for paying off some The young clergyman immediately persons who were threatening him with shut his eyes, and twisting open his personal diligence.-" Ay, trowth, mouth, said grace. We then sat down said Mrs Gilmourton," he maun scart to dinner, which was soup, and a leg first whar he finds the bitin' yuckiest, of roasted mutton, with a boiled fowl as they say.” and ham ; and afterwards a brace of After some more conversation, this muir-fowl was brought in; and Mrs outspoken old lady rose, and left us to Gilmourton said, “ Here is what Mr our punch; and the evening passed Snapflint handed into our pantry.” pleasantly, till we saw from the win. On which Mr Snapflint observed, “We dow that the sun was approaching tohave had an excellent dinner already, wards the horizon, and the longer and you should have kept the birds till shadows falling from the mountains. another day for yourselves, or other vi- The minister insisted, that before our sitors.” “Na, troth, no we,” replied departure we should take tea, which Mrs Gilmourton, “what's in our wame was to be prepared immediately. Till is no in our testament, and we'll soon then, he said, Mr Glebersmouth and be getting mair.” While this conver- I might go down and take a turn in

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