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Melodious birds sing madrigals ;-
To shallow rivers, to whose falls—
Sim. No weapons, sir: There comes my master, master Shallow, and another gentleman from Frogmore, over the stile, this way.
Eva. Pray you give me my gown; or else keep it in your arms.
Enter PAGE, SHALLOW, and SLENDER.
Slen. Ah, sweet Anne Page!
Shal. What! the sword and the word ! do you study them both, master parson?
Page. And youthful still, in your doublet and hose, this raw rheumatic day?
Eva. There is reasons and causes for it.
Page. We are come to you to do a good office, master parson.
Eva. Fery well: What is it?
Page. Yonder is a most reverend gentleman, who, be like, having received wrong by some person, is at most odds with his own gravity and patience, that ever you saw.
Shal. I have lived fourscore years and upward; I never heard a man of his place, gravity, and learning, so wide of his own respect.
Eva. What is he?
Page. I think you know him; master doctor Caius the renowned French physician.
Eva. Got's will, and his passion of my heart! I had as lief you would tell me of a mess of porridge.
Eva. He has no more knowledge in Hibocrates and Galen, - and he is a knave besides; a cowardly knave, as you would desires to be acquainted withal.
parEra. Feronder is a pong by some it ever your " i never
Page. I warrant you, he's the man should fight with him. Slen. O, sweet Anne Page!
Shal. It appears so, by his weapons :—Keep them asunder; here comes doctor Caius.
Enter Host, Caius, and Rugby. Page. Nay, good master parson, keep in your weapon. Shal. So do you, good master doctor.
Host. Disarm them, and let them question; let them keep their limbs whole, and hack our English.
Caius. I pray you, let-a me speak a word vit your ear: Verefore vill you not meet a-me?
Eva. Pray you, use your patience: In good time.
Eva. Pray you, let us not be laughing-stogs to other men's humors; I desire you in friendship, and I will one way or other make you amends :- I will knog your urinals about your knave's cogscomb, for missing your meetings and appointments.
Caius. Diable ! - Jack Rugby, mine Host de Jarterre, - have I not stay for him to kill him ? have I not, at de place I did appoint ?
Eva. As I am a Christians soul, now, look you, this is the place appointed; I'll be judgment by mine host of the Garter.
Host. Peace, I say, Guallia and Gaul, French and Welsh, soul-curer and body-curer.
Caius. Ay, dat is very good! excellent! .
Host. Peace, I say; hear mine host of the Garter. Am I politic ? am I subtle ? am I a Machiavel ? Shall I lose my doctor? no; he gives me the potions, and the motions. Shall I lose my parson, my priest, my Sir Hugh ? no; he gives me the proverbs and the no-verbs. — Give me thy hand, terrestrial; so:— Give me thy hand, celestial; so. - Boys of art, I have deceived you both; I have directed you to wrong places : your hearts are mighty, your skins are whole, and let burnt sack be the issue. — Come, lay their swords to pawn: - Follow me, lad of peace; follow, follow, follow.
Shal. Trust me, a mad host:—Follow, gentlemen, follow. Slen. O, sweet Anne Page!
[Exeunt SHAL. SLEN. Page, and Host. Caius. Ha! do I perceive dat? have you make-a de sot of us? ha, ha!
Eva. This is well: he has made us his vlouting-stog. I desire you, that we may be friends; and let us knog our
prains together, to be revenge on this same scall, scurvy, cogging companion, the host of the Garter.
Caius. By gar, vit all my heart; he promise to bring me vere is Anne Page : by gar, he deceive me too. Eva. Well, I will smite his noddles : — Pray you, follow.
o keep you now you areye your !
SCENE II. The Street in Windsor.
Enter MISTRESS Page and ROBIN. Mrs. Page. Nay, keep your way, little gallant; you were wont to be a follower, but now you are a leader; Whether had you rather lead mine eyes, or eye your master's heels?
Rob. I had rather, forsooth, go before you like a man, than follow him like a dwarf. · Mrs. Page. O, you are a flattering boy; now, I see you'll be a courtier.
Enter FORD. Ford. Well met, mistress Page: Whither go you? Mrs. Page. Truly, sir, to see your wife: Is she at home?
Ford. Ay; and as idle as she may hang together, for want of company : I think, if your husbands were dead, you two would marry.
Mrs. Page. Be sure of that, — two other husbands. Ford. Where had you this pretty weather-cock ?
Mrs. Page. I cannot tell what the dickens his name is my husband had him of: What do you call your knight's name, sirrah ?
Rob. Sir John Falstaff. Ford. Sir John Falstaff! Mrs. Page. He, he; I can never hit on's name. There's such a league between my good man and he!—Is your wife at home, indeed ?
Ford. Indeed she is.
Mrs. Page. By your leave, sir;-I am sick, till I see her.
[Exeunt MRS. PAGE and ROBIN. Ford. Has Page any brains ? hath he any eyes? hath he any thinking? Sure, they sleep; he hath no use of them. Why, this boy will carry a letter twenty miles, as easy as a cannon will shoot point blank twelve score. He piecesout his wife's inclination; he gives her folly motion and advantage: and now she's going to my wife, and Falstaff's boy with her. A man may hear this shower sing in the
as that her praised forch, there I shali my cue, and mary aim.
more. We have liber, and this day will, father
wind !— and Falstaff's boy with her! - Good plots !- they
Caius, and Rugby.
Ford. Trust me, a good knot: I have good cheer at home; and, I pray you all, go with me.
Shal. I must excuse myself, master Ford.
Slen. And so must I, sir: we have appointed to dine with mistress Anne, and I would not break with her for more money than I'll speak off.
Shal. We have lingered about a match between Anne Page and my cousin Slender, and this day we shall have our answer.
Slen. I hope I have your good will, father Page.
Page. You have, master Slender; I stand wholly for you:- but my wife, master doctor, is for you altogether.
Caius. Ay, by gar; and de maid is love-a me; my nursh-a Quickly tell me so mush.
Host. What say you to young master Fenton ? he capers, he dances, he has eyes of youth, he writes verses, he speaks holyday, he smells April and May: he will carry't, he will carry't; 'tis in his buttons; he will carry't.
Page. Not by my consent, I promise you. The gentle man is of no having: he kept company with the wild Prince and Poins; he is of too high a region, he knows too much. No, he shall not knit a knot in his fortunes with the finger of my substance: if he take her, let him take her simply; the wealth I have waits on my consent, and my consent goes not that way.
Ford. I beseech you, heartily, some of you go home with me to dinner: besides your cheer, you shall have sport; I will show you a monster.- Master doctor, you shall go; -80 shall you, master Page; - and you, Sir Hugh.
Shal. Well, fare you well: — we shall have the freer wooing at master Page's. (Exeunt SHALLOW and SLENDER, Caius. Go home, John Rugby; I come anon.
[Exit RUGBY. VOL. I. – 11
, Host. Farewell, my hearts: I will to my honest knight Falstaff, and drink canary with him. [Exit Host.
Ford. [Aside. I think, I shall drink in pipe-wine first with him; I'll make him dance. Will you go, gentles ?
All. Have with you, to see this monster. [Ereunt.
SCENE III. A Room in Ford's House.
Enter Mrs. Ford and Mrs. PAGE.
Enter Servants with a basket.
Mrs. Ford. Marry, as I told you before, John and Robert, be ready here hard by in the brewhouse; and when I suddenly call you, come forth, and (without any pause, or staggering) take this basket on your shoulders : that done, trudge with it in all haste, and carry it among the whitsters in Datchet mead, and there empty it in the muddy ditch, close by the Thames's side.
Mrs. Page. You will do it?
Mrs. Ford. I have told them over and over; they lack no direction: Be gone, and come when you are called.
[Exeunt Servants. Mrs. Page. Here comes little Robin.
Enter Robin. Mrs. Ford. How now, my eyas-musket? what news with you ?
Rob. My master Sir John has come in at your back door, mistress Ford, and requests your company."
Mrs. Page. You little Jack-a-lent, have you been true to us?
Rob. Ay, I'll be sworn: My master knows not of your being here; and hath threatened to put me into everlasting liberty, if I tell you of it; for, he swears, he'll turn me away.
Mrs. Page. Thou art a good boy; this secrecy of thine shall be a tailor to thee, and shall make thee a new doublet and hose. — I'll go hide me.
Mrs. Ford. Do so:— Go tell thy master, I am alone. Mistress Page, remember you your cue. [Exit Robin.